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  • area9103
    ... 1. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you re a conservative radio host. Then it s an illness and you need our prayers for your
    Message 1 of 2 , Mar 22, 2004
      --- In Slovak-World@yahoogroups.com, capt jack <captjack00@y...>
      wrote:
      >
      > Subject: A Historical View of Democracy
      > Things you have to believe to be a true Republican today:


      1. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless
      you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need
      our prayers for your recovery.


      2. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our
      highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.


      3. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your workers and
      moving their jobs to India.


      4. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but
      multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind
      without regulation.


      5. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and
      Hillary Clinton.


      6. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops
      in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.


      7. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday
      run for governor of California as a Republican.


      8. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.


      9. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time
      allies, then demand their cooperation and money.


      10.HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at
      heart.


      11.Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing
      health care to all Americans is socialism.


      12.Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but
      creationism should be taught in schools.


      13.It is okay that the Bush family has done $millions of business
      with the Bin Laden family.


      14.Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's
      daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him
      and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.


      15.A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable
      offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which
      thousands die is solid defense policy.


      16.Government should limit itself to the powers named in the
      Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the
      Internet.


      17.The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but
      George Bush's driving record is none of our business.


      18.You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John
      Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have a
      right to adopt.


      19.What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest,
      but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.


      20.Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but
      trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international
      harmony.
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