Re: [Slovak-World] Visiting your relatives and some other thoughts
There is a lot of wisdom in what you have written below. As both frequent
guests and hosts, it makes a lot of sense.
Jack and Chris Gergely
----- Original Message -----
From: "Vladimir Bohinc" <konekta@...>
To: "Slovak World" <Slovak-World@yahoogroups.com>
Sent: Wednesday, July 02, 2003 4:23 AM
Subject: [Slovak-World] Visiting your relatives and some other thoughts
> Dear SW,
> Serbs have a proverb ;" Svakog gosta za tri dana dosta."
> Translated it means "Every guest is welcome for three days".
> What is the truth behind this old saying?
> There are two types of visits; short and long.
> Characteristics of a short visit;
> - everybody is enthusiastic
> - everybody has a hang over
> - the food, that was prepared, may last that long
> - some people may not be sleeping in their own beds
> - it is about as much one can afford not going to regular work, in order
to take care of the visitor
> - it is about as much one can afford to finance without being sure, that
this was a good investment
> - it is about as long as one can stay in original underwear
> A longer visit
> - enthusiasm is gone and normal life steps in
> - one can not afford any more hang overs
> - a plan has to be made " What shall we do with them?"
> - guests begin to inspect the house and discover things, that were hidden
> - Guests want to wash their clothing. Who will do that? If the guests do
that, they may see the dirty underwear of the family, waiting there to be
washed. If the hosts are to do that they will see theirs. ( I experienced an
open offer of the host to wash the underwear of the guests!)
> - Hosts begin to wonder, what is in the suitcases of the guests. ( I
experienced this too. While the american lady was out for a church visit,
her luggage was inspected by the housewife. Interesingly, she wanted me to
be a witness, that she did not take anything)
> - one has to go back to normal work and there is nobody to take care of
the guest entertainment program
> - one thinks about whether to go to the police and report a guest or not.
Neighbors are watching this very closely.
> - if the guests are taking their own tours and come only to sleep, the
host gets a feeling of being used as a cheap hotel.
> - usually, there is a question about the mobility of the guests. Should we
give them our car or should one of us drive them around to places they want
to see and other people they want to meet. Maybe the host is not on a good
foot with some of those people or would not like to share "his American"
> - some people work and eat at the workplace. Who will cook for the
visitors and what.
> So, these are some considerations, that show, that some thought has to be
spent on these issues. A transition from a short visit to a longer one is
crucial. Some don't master it and then we have complaints afterwards.
> Being in a hotel and visiting relatives is a very safe option, but does
not really promote creation of tighter family ties.
> Finding the right blend is the art. This will be specific to any hosting
family, so no advices can be given here.
> With best regards,
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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