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Re: some questions for which i'm desperate for answers

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  • infiltrator15
    ... myself, the ... and ... animal! ... and a nice ... perhaps by an ... younger brother ... haranguing ... Frank that ... week. Part ... recognized ...
    Message 1 of 15 , Jul 4, 2002
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      --- In ShadowRealms@y..., MinaW0505@a... wrote:
      > That's good advice Tal ::winks:: I'm working on two books
      myself, the
      > largest thing I've ever had published before however are just poems
      and
      > magazine articles and I can tell you this is a hugely different
      animal!
      > Sometimes though, its best to explain that chip on the shoulder,
      and a nice
      > little memory flashback often works very well ... precipitated
      perhaps by an
      > event that triggers the temper. In the example you gave, the
      younger brother
      > resenting overbearing older siblings, perhaps something like ...
      >
      > Red rage clouded his eyes for a moment as he looked at the man
      haranguing
      > him with questions. It reminded him so much of his older brother
      Frank that
      > he had to clench his fist to keep from knocking the man into next
      week. Part
      > of him wanted to rain blows on him until not even the man's dog
      recognized
      > him, though inwardly he squirmed at bit at this ... recalling lazy
      summer
      > afternoons when his brothers would endlessly torment him, making
      him resent
      > them, that resentment growing and overtaking the natural sibling
      tagalong
      > worship until there was nothing left but that resentment between
      them. He
      > knew it wasn't this minor diplomat his anger lay with ... it was
      Frank,
      > Billy, and Hal who had given him swirlies and depantsed him in
      front of the
      > head cheerleader.
      > Either way, he was pissed.


      Mina, I hope I'm not expected to write like that at 14 ;). I enjoyed
      reading it. Thanks for the help.
    • infiltrator15
      Alyssa, I ve read both your messages. They ve been very encouraging, thank-you. Vic
      Message 2 of 15 , Jul 4, 2002
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        Alyssa, I've read both your messages. They've been very encouraging,
        thank-you.

        Vic
      • infiltrator15
        ... beginning writers ... secondary ... in that you ... I think I m one of those beginning writers =]. SO do I explain only parts of the world that are
        Message 3 of 15 , Jul 4, 2002
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          --- In ShadowRealms@y..., talpianna@a... wrote:
          > Right. What I was getting at is the tendency of
          beginning writers
          > (I know it well!) to over-explain. Once one has created an entire
          secondary
          > world, the hardest thing to do is to keep from putting everything
          in that you
          > have come up with, rather than keeping it offstage.

          I think I'm one of those beginning writers =]. SO do I explain only
          parts of the world that are important, and the things that are
          important, and make sure I don't go into detail about anything else?

          My protagonist is a mage. He knows magic (obviously) but I don't know
          whether to just say he can do something, or go in depth about how he
          does it and why he can do it.

          Thanks.

          Vic
        • talpianna@aol.com
          Vic-- Most of the stories I ve read that go into detail about how the magic works are stories about someone learning magic, like Ursula K. Le Guin s A Wizard
          Message 4 of 15 , Jul 4, 2002
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            Vic--

            Most of the stories I've read that go into detail about how the magic
            works are stories about someone learning magic, like Ursula K. Le Guin's A
            Wizard of Earthsea, Diana Wynne Jones's Cart and Cwidder, Diane Duane's So
            You Want to Be a Wizard and The Door into Fire and several of Mercedes
            Lackey's books. I suggest you think of your world-building as like the early
            animated films in which the background was a static backdrop while the
            characters moved. You don't need as much detail in the story as you do to
            create the story.

            My protagonist is a mage. He knows magic (obviously) but I don't know
            whether to just say he can do something, or go in depth about how he
            does it and why he can do it.

            If it's important to the story, show him doing it. There are wonderful
            descriptions of spellcasting in both the Duane books I mentioned. (Note: the
            main love relationship in Door into Fire is homosexual, so if that's going to
            bother you, don't read it.) If it isn't all that important, just mention or
            summarize, i.e., "Fastolf composed himself and, as he had been taught, ran
            through the various steps necessary for the Summoning: he centered himself,
            raised ketheric energy, lit the candles in the proper order as he chanted the
            words of the ancient spell he had found in the Mauve Book of Rowrbazzle, and
            made the ritual gestures with his athame."
            Then you go on in more detail about the appearance of the demon and Fastolf's
            interaction with it.

            If you later decide that you should have explained the earlier stuff
            better--well, that's what second drafts are for!

            tal


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          • William West
            My protagonist is a mage. He knows magic (obviously) but I don t know whether to just say he can do something, or go in depth about how he does it and why he
            Message 5 of 15 , Jul 4, 2002
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              My protagonist is a mage. He knows magic (obviously) but I don't know
              whether to just say he can do something, or go in depth about how he
              does it and why he can do it.

              Thanks.

              Vic

              Rather than give one long "explanation", trysomething like Anne did in the
              Blood - little tidbits about people when certain situations popped up. It
              makes the reader more interested and gets them to read more. I know I
              devoured every little bit of info given about Daemon. The way he was written
              (including the info about his abilities, power, etc.) kept me constantly
              wanting more. Wait a minute, what do I mean "kept"? I still want more! :)

              Angela
            • Ashredfern1@aol.com
              In a message dated 7/4/02 6:07:05 PM Central Daylight Time, ... As the man ran toward him, Xavior raised his staff, closing his eyes and whispering the words
              Message 6 of 15 , Jul 4, 2002
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                In a message dated 7/4/02 6:07:05 PM Central Daylight Time,
                infiltrator15@... writes:


                > My protagonist is a mage. He knows magic (obviously) but I don't know
                > whether to just say he can do something, or go in depth about how he
                > does it and why he can do it.
                >
                > Thanks.
                >
                > Maybe just show he can do it.
                'As the man ran toward him, Xavior raised his staff, closing his eyes and
                whispering the words that he had been taught so long ago. With the words blue
                light circled his body. He opened his eyes, the man was within feet of him.
                He pointed the staff and the man and whispered again. The blue light spung
                towards the man, pushing him away and knocking him unconscious.'

                Because in there you show (And it is better to show then tell, or so my
                teachers have said) what the attack is and that he has known it for a while.
                You don't have to go in depth saying teacher so and so taught it to him when
                he was __ years old.

                Alyssa

                ' "That's rather degrading, do I really look like I would go and sleep in
                some worm eaten wooden box?" ' - Chase Frost on sleeping in coffins.

                'Hello, my name is Lucifer, the light bringer. I have no last name. I am one
                of God's angels, or, at least I use to be. Before He tore off my wings and
                cast me down to this abyss of fire. This is my story.'

                '"I personally find it quite humorous that religious leaders think that the
                cross wards off evil vampires. What do they think happened? As soon as their
                religion started there was spontaneous generation and vampires suddenly came
                into existence? I think not." ' -Chase Frost on crosses.



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              • infiltrator15
                Thanks for the advice. Maybe next time I shouldn t click send so many times :S sorry for the three extra. Vic
                Message 7 of 15 , Jul 4, 2002
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                  Thanks for the advice.

                  Maybe next time I shouldn't click 'send' so many times :S sorry for
                  the three extra.

                  Vic
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