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What I do with each present, precious moment

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  • may_ub.happy2
    Dear Venerable Monks, I am a 52-year-old single man. I am a member of a Vihara that is in my community. Most of the monks at the Vihara are from Sri Lanka. I
    Message 1 of 1 , May 17, 2008
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      Dear Venerable Monks,

      I am a 52-year-old single man. I am a member of a Vihara that is in
      my community. Most of the monks at the Vihara are from Sri Lanka. I
      don't, very often, get to have private talks with the monks. I am
      also in a Sutta study group at the Vihara and have studied meditation
      with the monks. The end of suffering is something I cannot stop
      thinking about. I am a compassionate and generous person, but I
      would like to do so much more. I work full time and often do not
      have the energy each day to be doing for others. I am thinking about
      quitting my job in order to have time to show compassion and to help
      others lessen or end their suffering. When I think about my
      practice, I think that I could meditate more. I could spend more
      hours reading the Suttas. Most of all, I think that I should be
      giving more to others to help them find happiness. It is by being
      compassionate and giving that I find happiness,too. What I question
      now is my faith, my trust in my own ability to let go. My ability
      not to feel the loss of some luxuries and comforts that are all
      temporary. I feel that I should be pursuing a life of compassion
      with no fear. Yet, I am hesitant and have some worry. I do not
      want to waste my precious time that I should be giving to others just
      because I have anxieties, fears, concerns about the future. Yes, I
      know that meditation is to bring me to the present moment. But, I do
      not want to wait for the time when I have no fear. I will die. I
      know I am going to die. Before I die, I want to love and to give
      without attachment, but with my heart. Please, would you tell me
      what you think of this? How should I approach this, please. Thank
      you so very much for your example and your sacrifice for all of us.
      It seems odd that I am asking this question of monks who have given
      up so much. Thank you, Bruce of Arlington, Virginia
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