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396Re: Practicing generosity

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  • Bhikkhu Pesala
    Jul 14, 2003
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      This is a hard one to answer, which is why I have put off replying.
      After all, what do we monks know about the trials of marriage?

      I'm not surprised that your wife gets angry if you're secretive about
      your giving. Honesty is always the best policy. Have the courage to
      do good even in the face of opposition. You're duty to your parents
      is greater than your duty to your wife. If they are poor, you have to
      help them. However, you also have to live within your means. It is
      too easy to borrow money these days. Do not go down that road
      further than you must.

      In my experience the Sangha appreciate non-material support far
      more than material support. Most monks would rather you paid
      sincere respect to them and listened attentively to their teachings,
      than put $100 in the donation box. If they don't think like that, then
      maybe they are not worth supporting?

      Everybody wants love and respect more than money. Just keep
      practising patience and loving-kindness, and always be
      transparently honest. No real harm ever came from practising such
      virtues.

      I hope that helps.

      Bhikkhu Pesal
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