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"RASTER" was a 19 year old college student with a 3.7 GPA and a pre-med major who put a gun to his head at the break between semesters 3 & 4.
Nobody knew why -except for me. He'd talked about his "struggle" with me since 8th grade on. He was a guy who happened to love guys & didn't fit any of the "gay" stereotypes. He'd seen "gay" websites/pubs & told me he didn't feel right associating with that. I knew exactly how he felt. We both grew up in the same conservative small town & attended the same 'loving, hate-filled church'.
Ras had failed to make a distinction that I'd made. He thought God hated SameSex attractions.
I suspected that God actually hated acts that caused disease & death (I.E: AnalSex).
Ras had been lied to & believed the lies until the self-condemnation of his feelings broke him. He thought he was virtually alone with his feelings.
I suspected that lots of guys felt the same things because I'd been in bed with several of my classmates since puberty.
Ras thought that loving guys made him "GAY".
I thought "GAY" was a word that had outgrown mere attractions to embrace every form of decadence known to man. Ergo: I was NOT "gay" for loving men any more than being "pro-life" made me a Republican. "Gay" was a slang-term -the meaning of such derived by popular use. I was not into ArseSex nor GenderPhuck. Ergo: I was not "gay".
Raster took his secret to the grave. He left a mystery. I suspect that this mystery happens way too much.
So let me tell you the facts:
Guys have been loving on guys since recorded history (& ancient Greece left quite an artistic record). AnalSex (the hallmark of "gay-today") was illegal in those same cultures. It's what was specifically banned in Leviticus 20:13 & Romans 1 (not SameSex affection)!
Luv'n buddy good. ButtPhuck evil.
Society generally doesn't contemplate the distinctions. I hope you do. It's a matter of life or death; -Pride vs. Shame.
The G0YS men's movement knows these things.
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  • 101
  • Teens
  • Aug 14, 2008
  • English

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