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Re: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed

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  • Michael Mojher
    Dear Eleanor, Can you elaborate on who they say they are or not. Is Ladislav claiming to be a genealogy researcher? What? Michael Mojher ... From: Eleanor
    Message 1 of 10 , Jan 7, 2004
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      Dear Eleanor,
      Can you elaborate on "who they say they are or not." Is Ladislav
      claiming to be a genealogy researcher? What?
      Michael Mojher
      ----- Original Message -----
      From: "Eleanor Chobirko" <ellemarie15642@...>
      To: <SLOVAK-ROOTS@yahoogroups.com>
      Sent: Wednesday, January 07, 2004 5:36 AM
      Subject: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed


      > Dear listers,
      > I received the message below. I need your opinions on how to know if
      someone is who they say they are or not.
      > Eleanor
      > --------------------------------------------------------------------------
      ------------------------------------------------------
      >
      >
      > I`m from Slovakia. Are you from family of Cobirka or Chobirka?I know where
      is Svidnik and Korejovce and I have been there. Can I help you? Maybe you
      can help me. I found our family in USA called Cobirka or Chobirka.
      Ladislav from Slovakia
      >
      >
      >
      >
      >
      > ---------------------------------
      > Do you Yahoo!?
      > Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
      >
      > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
      >
      >
      > To unsubscribe from this group, go to
      http://www.yahoogroups.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS -or- send blank email to
      SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
      >
      > Yahoo! Groups Links
      >
      > To visit your group on the web, go to:
      > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS/
      >
      > To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
      > SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
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      >
    • Eleanor Chobirko
      Michael, I replied to the email from Ladislav asking him what his surname was and told him that our family was from Boksa, which is south of the two villages
      Message 2 of 10 , Jan 7, 2004
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        Michael,
        I replied to the email from Ladislav asking him what his surname was and told him
        that our family was from Boksa, which is south of the two villages or towns that he
        mentioned. I also asked him what town or village he was from.
        He did not say he was a researcher.
        He answered my reply with "what or where is a Boksa"
        He said his surname was Cobirka.
        He did not say where he was from in Slovaia.
        So, the point I was getting at - Is he Ladislav Cobirka or just trying to get
        information for some other reason than looking for family.
        Eleanor


        Michael Mojher <mgmojher@...> wrote:
        Dear Eleanor,
        Can you elaborate on "who they say they are or not." Is Ladislav
        claiming to be a genealogy researcher? What?
        Michael Mojher
        ----- Original Message -----
        From: "Eleanor Chobirko" <ellemarie15642@...>
        To: <SLOVAK-ROOTS@yahoogroups.com>
        Sent: Wednesday, January 07, 2004 5:36 AM
        Subject: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed


        > Dear listers,
        > I received the message below. I need your opinions on how to know if
        someone is who they say they are or not.
        > Eleanor
        > --------------------------------------------------------------------------
        ------------------------------------------------------
        >
        >
        > I`m from Slovakia. Are you from family of Cobirka or Chobirka?I know where
        is Svidnik and Korejovce and I have been there. Can I help you? Maybe you
        can help me. I found our family in USA called Cobirka or Chobirka.
        Ladislav from Slovakia





        ---------------------------------
        Do you Yahoo!?
        Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes

        [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
      • Michael Mojher
        Eleanor, It is always wise to be cautious. Since Ladislav has not made any suspicious requests I would continue the correspondence. He appears to have a
        Message 3 of 10 , Jan 7, 2004
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          Eleanor,
          It is always wise to be cautious. Since Ladislav has not made any
          suspicious requests I would continue the correspondence. He appears to have
          a legitimate interest since your surname is the same as the family he is
          looking for in the USA.
          Genealogy research by its nature requires you to trust that people are
          wanting or needing help. You have seen how this group, made up of strangers
          with a similar interest, are willing to help one another. There is a
          serendipity in helping, often by accident relatives make contact or are put
          in contact with one another.
          You would be fortunate if Ladislav proofs to be your connection in
          Slovakia who is willing to help. Having a "local" working for you can
          provide you with a big advantage.
          Should Ladislav make a request that you are not comfortable with you can
          terminate your communicating or present it to the group to see if it is an
          honest request.
          I say continue.
          Michael Mojher
          ----- Original Message -----
          From: "Eleanor Chobirko" <ellemarie15642@...>
          To: <SLOVAK-ROOTS@yahoogroups.com>
          Sent: Wednesday, January 07, 2004 2:23 PM
          Subject: Re: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed


          > Michael,
          > I replied to the email from Ladislav asking him what his surname was and
          told him
          > that our family was from Boksa, which is south of the two villages or
          towns that he
          > mentioned. I also asked him what town or village he was from.
          > He did not say he was a researcher.
          > He answered my reply with "what or where is a Boksa"
          > He said his surname was Cobirka.
          > He did not say where he was from in Slovaia.
          > So, the point I was getting at - Is he Ladislav Cobirka or just trying to
          get
          > information for some other reason than looking for family.
          > Eleanor
          >
          >
          > Michael Mojher <mgmojher@...> wrote:
          > Dear Eleanor,
          > Can you elaborate on "who they say they are or not." Is Ladislav
          > claiming to be a genealogy researcher? What?
          > Michael Mojher
          > ----- Original Message -----
          > From: "Eleanor Chobirko" <ellemarie15642@...>
          > To: <SLOVAK-ROOTS@yahoogroups.com>
          > Sent: Wednesday, January 07, 2004 5:36 AM
          > Subject: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed
          >
          >
          > > Dear listers,
          > > I received the message below. I need your opinions on how to know if
          > someone is who they say they are or not.
          > > Eleanor
          >
          > --------------------------------------------------------------------------
          > ------------------------------------------------------
          > >
          > >
          > > I`m from Slovakia. Are you from family of Cobirka or Chobirka?I know
          where
          > is Svidnik and Korejovce and I have been there. Can I help you? Maybe you
          > can help me. I found our family in USA called Cobirka or Chobirka.
          > Ladislav from Slovakia
          >
          >
          >
          >
          >
          > ---------------------------------
          > Do you Yahoo!?
          > Yahoo! Hotjobs: Enter the "Signing Bonus" Sweepstakes
          >
          > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
          >
          >
          > To unsubscribe from this group, go to
          http://www.yahoogroups.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS -or- send blank email to
          SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
          >
          > Yahoo! Groups Links
          >
          > To visit your group on the web, go to:
          > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS/
          >
          > To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
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          >
        • nhasior@aol.com
          Elinor, There are five people in the Slovak telephone book named Cobirka in Svidnik. One Cobirka came over in 1923 from Miroly, Czechoslovakia Have you found
          Message 4 of 10 , Jan 7, 2004
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            Elinor,
            There are five people in the Slovak telephone book named Cobirka in Svidnik.
            One Cobirka came over in 1923 from Miroly, Czechoslovakia
            Have you found anyone with this name in the United States??
            Ask Ladislaw where the Cobirka people are in the USA.
            I think he is trying to connect with family and I would continue to
            correspond with him a little at a time. his letter sounds genuine to me, but you have
            to trust your gut feelings at all times. Just take it slow. We are all
            strangers in the beginning. Good luck
            Noreen


            [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
          • Dollins
            ... suspicious requests I would continue the correspondence. He appears to have a legitimate interest since your surname is the same as the family he is
            Message 5 of 10 , Jan 8, 2004
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              > It is always wise to be cautious. Since Ladislav has not made any
              suspicious requests I would continue the correspondence. He appears to have
              a legitimate interest since your surname is the same as the family he is
              looking for in the USA.
              > Genealogy research by its nature requires you to trust that people are
              wanting or needing help . . . There is a serendipity in helping, often by
              accident relatives make contact or are put in contact with one another.

              Last fall I went back and forth with someone who contacted me about one of
              my surnames. His first email was "want photos?" (Talk about suspicious!) We
              kept writing for a couple of weeks and eventually discovered that we have
              the same great-grandparents. Now I have about fifty more cousins in Slovakia
              than I did a couple of months ago!

              Keep writing. You never know what might come of the correspondence!

              Anabeth
            • John M,
              ... I was lucky to find a student on the Net that lived close to my relatives in SK. Some of my relatives lived close to him in the same city and the others
              Message 6 of 10 , Jan 8, 2004
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                At 02:23 PM 1/7/2004 -0800, you wrote:
                >Michael,
                >I replied to the email from Ladislav asking him what his surname was and
                >told him
                >that our family was from Boksa, which is south of the two villages or
                >towns that he
                >mentioned. I also asked him what town or village he was from.
                >He did not say he was a researcher.
                >He answered my reply with "what or where is a Boksa"
                >He said his surname was Cobirka.
                >He did not say where he was from in Slovaia.
                >So, the point I was getting at - Is he Ladislav Cobirka or just trying to get
                >information for some other reason than looking for family.
                >Eleanor

                I was lucky to find a student on the Net that lived close to my relatives
                in SK. Some of my relatives lived close to him in the same city and the
                others lived in an ancestral village about 15 miles away. He contacted
                both sets and drove to my ancestral village to get information for
                me. That resulted in a trip to SK in 1999. It's worth the effort to
                maintain communication but, as has been stated by others, "with caution".

                I found a Pavla C^obirkov√° in Stropkov, which is about a mile east of
                Boksa. I believe cell phones are not listed and, since there are so many in
                use in SK, there shjould be more C^obirkas in the area.

                John M.
              • Bill Tarkulich
                Anabeth, You make a good point. With so much spam running amok, it s best to write an email subject carefully. I like to use surnames and place names to
                Message 7 of 10 , Jan 8, 2004
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                  Anabeth,
                  You make a good point. With so much spam running amok, it's best to write
                  an email subject carefully. I like to use surnames and place names to alert
                  people when they see a sender (me) that they don't know.

                  I spend a lot of time "cold-calling" people in my genealogical work, both by
                  email, phone and letter. A well placed letter of introduction is always in
                  order. When someone like this writes to you, ask him/her all the same
                  questions you might want to write in a letter of introduction.

                  The first thing I try to do is prove they are serious in their intent. Many
                  people throw out a bunch of names and see what will stick. Very lazy
                  approach - they get out what they put in, very little. It has been my
                  experience that people who are dead serious about their researcher (those
                  are the people you want to talk to) will be willing to share lots of
                  information.

                  Some questions you should ask:
                  Where village are your ancestors from? Where do you live now?
                  Have you written to the family in the US? Where are they? What are their
                  names?
                  Have you written a family tree? Can I see it? What are your surnames?
                  Have you looked at village records for family?
                  Do you know people of my surname? Who?
                  What can you tell me about the village?


                  I think it's entirely safe to tell him/her:
                  My immigrant ancestor NAME was born about 18xx in and came to the US in
                  19yy. His spouse's name was... He had brothers/sisters/parents named etc.
                  Have you heard of these names?

                  This inquisition should not only demonstrate knowledge, but willingness to
                  share, and seriousness of intent. Follow this with a series of measured
                  exchanges and see just how helpful s/he is. The overwhelming number of
                  people in the SR are incredibly sincere and generous. You also have the
                  great pond called the Atlantic Ocean between the two of you. I used to
                  worry at first that they would show up at my doorstep someday. That just
                  simply isn't going to happen.

                  I am in the enviable position of just having opened up "pandora's box" of
                  immigrants from the village of Ulic and environs. I have located where a
                  large number of them settled and am in the process of matching up American
                  with Slovak national families. I have people in Ulic who are looking and
                  people in America looking. Even being familiar with the village, you still
                  have to approach each introduction with kid gloves. Not only to show I am
                  serious, but also to measure how interested the receiving end is. I need
                  not tell you how many of our relatives are NOT interested in genealogy!

                  Good Luck and tell us how you make out.

                  ______________
                  Bill Tarkulich




                  -----Original Message-----
                  From: Dollins [mailto:axd2@...]
                  Sent: Thursday, January 08, 2004 8:48 AM
                  To: SLOVAK-ROOTS@yahoogroups.com
                  Subject: Re: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed


                  > It is always wise to be cautious. Since Ladislav has not made any
                  suspicious requests I would continue the correspondence. He appears to have
                  a legitimate interest since your surname is the same as the family he is
                  looking for in the USA.
                  > Genealogy research by its nature requires you to trust that people
                  > are
                  wanting or needing help . . . There is a serendipity in helping, often by
                  accident relatives make contact or are put in contact with one another.

                  Last fall I went back and forth with someone who contacted me about one of
                  my surnames. His first email was "want photos?" (Talk about suspicious!) We
                  kept writing for a couple of weeks and eventually discovered that we have
                  the same great-grandparents. Now I have about fifty more cousins in Slovakia
                  than I did a couple of months ago!

                  Keep writing. You never know what might come of the correspondence!

                  Anabeth



                  To unsubscribe from this group, go to
                  http://www.yahoogroups.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS -or- send blank email to
                  SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

                  Yahoo! Groups Links

                  To visit your group on the web, go to:
                  http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS/

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                • Vladimir Bohinc
                  Since cold calling is my job I would like to add a couple of words too. There is an interesting difference between the US and Slovakia. If I call a person in
                  Message 8 of 10 , Jan 8, 2004
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                    Since "cold calling" is my job I would like to add a couple of words too.
                    There is an interesting difference between the US and Slovakia.
                    If I call a person in Slovakia, their first thought is " this must be about
                    inheritance or some money".
                    If I call a person in US, their first thought is " he wants something from
                    me, he will show up at the door,I do not want to be involved in any
                    immigration related problems"
                    Of course, I simplify, but these are main common denominators.
                    Since 9/11, one additional factor came into play; terrorists. Now, everybody
                    can also be a potential terrorist or their supporter. Now, since the big
                    brother is watching everything already, any contact with a "suspicious"
                    person can be dangerous. This is the thinking on the US side.
                    I must admit, I do not know the right words to express my deepest
                    disappointment over this issue.
                    If this will continue, it will be the end of good relations among people.
                    If a person has "fear", be it legitimate or "implanted" by propaganda, then
                    the sick imagination has no limits any more. Imagination about what bad
                    could happen to one and how mean somebody else could be is then predominant
                    and always present. (Be on alert)Such thinking can not be a basis for any
                    friendly, and sure not honest relationship.
                    The problem with cold calling is, that it is very , very, difficult to make
                    it look different than a spam.
                    Since legitimate and illegitimate spammers are more or less all trained in a
                    way, they know all the tricks, how to approach a person and how to generate
                    interest.
                    Since our researcher is after the same goal, he has to present his case in a
                    way, that should generate interest on the other side. If it looks like a
                    spam, he is branded as spammer, if it doesn't, he is suspicious.
                    The suspicion hysteria, that not so long ago was at home here, is now
                    overseas. I can say only one thing; it ruins everything. Forget the
                    friendship, forget love. All fake.
                    Is this what we want?
                    Since presenting a case in a right way is very difficult, non english
                    speakers have a big problem.
                    They do not know even how to express themselves correctly. If they try
                    harder, it is even more suspicious. ( Study the Nigerian scam)
                    On the other hand, a slovak person, being called, just can not beleive, that
                    there is not some money /property involved. For them, it is impossible to
                    believe, that there could be something else, not to mention family love. All
                    such cathegories have been killed by the former system which taught
                    suspicion and alertness as a duty of every citizen. Love could be present
                    only among the inner circle of the family. If you have not been identified
                    as one belonging to it, you are out and thus suspicious.
                    Internet and e-mails allow many things. In a way, they allow contacts that
                    were not possible before.
                    On the other hand, they also allow persons to hide their identity.
                    If you want to build a good relationship, do not hide behind acronyms. Write
                    your full name and test the contact with the snail mail as soon as possible.
                    If you are affraid of identity theft, give up genealogy.
                    For someone to steal your identity, I imagine, you would have to be rich, at
                    least worthwile.
                    Such fears remind me of an old woman, who is affraid to be raped.
                    When I receive mails from persons with whom I would like to establish a good
                    contact, and see, they are hesitating and evasive, I call them by phone and
                    settle the matter.
                    Since genealogy is about names, dates and places, at least with the dates,
                    you do not have to be picky.
                    You do not have to give away the full date. A year is enough. The same you
                    should expect from your counterparts. I am talking about living persons. The
                    rest is no secret.
                    Who is a son of whom is known to more than only family members, so it is
                    public. ( at least your neighbors know that) Most of the marriages are in
                    public and so are the funerals.
                    ( Once a Registrar would not tell me, when somebody died. I said, I will go
                    to the cemetery and find this out. Go, she said. I went and found.)
                    ===========
                    Back to e-mails;
                    I don't feel good, when I receive a mail from unknown person, that starts
                    with "Hi" and ends with "John"
                    This feeling has proven correct in most times.
                    Sending mails without addressing the person and without signature is an
                    insult.
                    Well then, enough of this very early morning poetry.
                    With best wishes,
                    Vladimir Bohinc




                    ----- Original Message -----
                    From: "Bill Tarkulich" <bill@...>
                    To: <SLOVAK-ROOTS@yahoogroups.com>
                    Sent: Friday, January 09, 2004 2:19 AM
                    Subject: RE: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed


                    > Anabeth,
                    > You make a good point. With so much spam running amok, it's best to write
                    > an email subject carefully. I like to use surnames and place names to
                    alert
                    > people when they see a sender (me) that they don't know.
                    >
                    > I spend a lot of time "cold-calling" people in my genealogical work, both
                    by
                    > email, phone and letter. A well placed letter of introduction is always
                    in
                    > order. When someone like this writes to you, ask him/her all the same
                    > questions you might want to write in a letter of introduction.
                    >
                    > The first thing I try to do is prove they are serious in their intent.
                    Many
                    > people throw out a bunch of names and see what will stick. Very lazy
                    > approach - they get out what they put in, very little. It has been my
                    > experience that people who are dead serious about their researcher (those
                    > are the people you want to talk to) will be willing to share lots of
                    > information.
                    >
                    > Some questions you should ask:
                    > Where village are your ancestors from? Where do you live now?
                    > Have you written to the family in the US? Where are they? What are their
                    > names?
                    > Have you written a family tree? Can I see it? What are your surnames?
                    > Have you looked at village records for family?
                    > Do you know people of my surname? Who?
                    > What can you tell me about the village?
                    >
                    >
                    > I think it's entirely safe to tell him/her:
                    > My immigrant ancestor NAME was born about 18xx in and came to the US in
                    > 19yy. His spouse's name was... He had brothers/sisters/parents named etc.
                    > Have you heard of these names?
                    >
                    > This inquisition should not only demonstrate knowledge, but willingness to
                    > share, and seriousness of intent. Follow this with a series of measured
                    > exchanges and see just how helpful s/he is. The overwhelming number of
                    > people in the SR are incredibly sincere and generous. You also have the
                    > great pond called the Atlantic Ocean between the two of you. I used to
                    > worry at first that they would show up at my doorstep someday. That just
                    > simply isn't going to happen.
                    >
                    > I am in the enviable position of just having opened up "pandora's box" of
                    > immigrants from the village of Ulic and environs. I have located where a
                    > large number of them settled and am in the process of matching up American
                    > with Slovak national families. I have people in Ulic who are looking and
                    > people in America looking. Even being familiar with the village, you
                    still
                    > have to approach each introduction with kid gloves. Not only to show I am
                    > serious, but also to measure how interested the receiving end is. I need
                    > not tell you how many of our relatives are NOT interested in genealogy!
                    >
                    > Good Luck and tell us how you make out.
                    >
                    > ______________
                    > Bill Tarkulich
                    >
                    >
                    >
                    >
                    > -----Original Message-----
                    > From: Dollins [mailto:axd2@...]
                    > Sent: Thursday, January 08, 2004 8:48 AM
                    > To: SLOVAK-ROOTS@yahoogroups.com
                    > Subject: Re: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed
                    >
                    >
                    > > It is always wise to be cautious. Since Ladislav has not made any
                    > suspicious requests I would continue the correspondence. He appears to
                    have
                    > a legitimate interest since your surname is the same as the family he is
                    > looking for in the USA.
                    > > Genealogy research by its nature requires you to trust that people
                    > > are
                    > wanting or needing help . . . There is a serendipity in helping, often
                    by
                    > accident relatives make contact or are put in contact with one another.
                    >
                    > Last fall I went back and forth with someone who contacted me about one of
                    > my surnames. His first email was "want photos?" (Talk about suspicious!)
                    We
                    > kept writing for a couple of weeks and eventually discovered that we have
                    > the same great-grandparents. Now I have about fifty more cousins in
                    Slovakia
                    > than I did a couple of months ago!
                    >
                    > Keep writing. You never know what might come of the correspondence!
                    >
                    > Anabeth
                    >
                    >
                    >
                    > To unsubscribe from this group, go to
                    > http://www.yahoogroups.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS -or- send blank email to
                    > SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
                    >
                    > Yahoo! Groups Links
                    >
                    > To visit your group on the web, go to:
                    > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS/
                    >
                    > To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
                    > SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
                    >
                    > Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to:
                    http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
                    >
                    >
                    >
                    >
                    > To unsubscribe from this group, go to
                    http://www.yahoogroups.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS -or- send blank email to
                    SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
                    >
                    >
                    > Yahoo! Groups Links
                    >
                    > To visit your group on the web, go to:
                    > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SLOVAK-ROOTS/
                    >
                    > To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
                    > SLOVAK-ROOTS-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
                    >
                    > Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to:
                    > http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
                    >
                    >
                    >
                    > __________ Informacia od NOD32 1.593 (20040105) __________
                    >
                    > Tato sprava bola preverena antivirusovym systemom NOD32.
                    > http://www.eset.sk
                    >
                    >
                  • nhasior@aol.com
                    Vladimir, You are up at 4:00am!!!!!! You are earlybird. Yes, terrorism is sad. Lost opportunities will be the result if we let terrorism control us.
                    Message 9 of 10 , Jan 9, 2004
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                      Vladimir,
                      You are up at 4:00am!!!!!! You are earlybird. Yes, terrorism is sad. Lost
                      opportunities will be the result if we let terrorism control us.

                      Regarding "cold meeting" people in other countries, when I went to south of
                      Poland in 2000, I had a car rental and was driving around in the village of my
                      grandfather looking for "lost relatives". (You could not get any more "lost"
                      than I was.)
                      I asked people about the family, and, of course since I was pronouncing my
                      family surname "wrong".. no one knew what I was talking about. Then I wrote
                      the name on a piece of paper and got the response "aha". They knew of the
                      family. So, they pointed which way to go and off I went. Soon I found myself at
                      the elementary school (actually the one and only school) and parked the car
                      outside the gate. Withing five minutes, the teachers and students were looking
                      out the window. A minute or two after that, the head teacher came out and
                      wanted to know what I was doing there. I thought that they were suspicious of
                      me. Maybe they were. Rightly so. I explained myself (Lord only knows how, did
                      not speak any Polish at that point) and soon a girl of about 18 came out and
                      opened the passenger door and just got in. she pointed ahead and said
                      "prosto" and straight ahead we went. I was amazed. this was it. "prosto". No
                      questions and no time for suspicion.
                      We drove a few miles through some of the most beautiful farmland and hills.
                      The perimeter of this village was a thick forest. In the background to the
                      south, always the Tatra mountains. It was late April and the land was coming
                      alive.
                      How beautiful. I started asking myself "why would anyone leave this place"
                      but soon reminded myself of the poverty in the 1900 timeframe.
                      To make a long story short, we soon were going from house to house, people
                      were getting in and out of my car and pointing "prosto". (straight ahead) I was
                      nervous and maybe they were also. But this was why I came and I decided that
                      one way or the other I would find the cemetary of my ancesters. Either as a
                      visitor or as one of the newest additions. This was my one chance to find
                      family. And these people were willing to help.
                      The 18 year old girl turned out to be the daughter of the head teacher of the
                      school. The people who got in and out of the car and gave so freely of
                      their time soon turned into friends that I correspond with to this day and value
                      their generosity. The teacher and her daughter are friends to this day also.
                      Their kindness eventually led me to find my second cousin. His grandfather
                      and my grandfather were brothers. The wonderful connection!! Unfortunately,
                      the connection was made 15 minutes after I left the village was heading back
                      to Krakow to catch a plane to go back to New York. So I did not actually meet
                      my cousin Ryzard in person, but I did meet his Dad, my cousin Wojchiech, who
                      was in his kitchen and just held out his blessed 84 year old arms and said
                      "Witam Kuzyna". Welcome cousin. He knew the connection already long before I
                      did.
                      We write to each other, my cousin's children are learning English at school.
                      Eleanor, this is why I recommend that you 'trust your gut feelings" my gut
                      feelings let me trust some of the best people I ever met. However, elsewhere
                      on this trip in 2000, my gut feeling told me to turn around and leave the area
                      as soon as possible. I did .
                      I wish you the best of luck and the happiest of travels. You may be starting
                      one of the best friendships with Ladislaw. By the way, in the 1998 telephone
                      book, there is a Cobirka in the city of Poprad also.
                      best wishes,
                      Noreen



                      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
                    • Bill Tarkulich
                      Only a very few people take genealogy work very seriously (like you.) Others casually post a message and then forget about it. A common strategy is the
                      Message 10 of 10 , Jan 27, 2004
                      • 0 Attachment
                        Only a very few people take genealogy work very seriously (like you.) Others casually post a message and then forget about it. A common strategy is the "dartboard method": throw a dart and see if it sticks anywhere. If it doesn't stick immediately they lose interest (an unfortunate American characteristic) That's too bad, since you put a lot of good work into it.

                        My approach has been to teach the person how to fish, not to do the fishing for him/her. I will provide leads, resources, opinions, etc., but it is up to the individual to put effort into the search. This stuff is not brain surgery, but it does require a methodical approach and persistence.

                        For the person who demonstrates effort, I will provide a bit more participation.

                        Don't give up trying to help people, just make sure they demonstrate to you their willingness to go the full mile.


                        >
                        > From: Eleanor Chobirko <ellemarie15642@...>
                        > Date: 2004/01/27 Tue AM 05:52:00 CST
                        > To: slovak-roots@yahoogroups.com
                        > Subject: [S-R] Your expert opinions needed
                        >
                        > Dear list members,
                        >
                        > I want to thank everyone who responded to my message,
                        >
                        > "Your expert opinions needed."
                        >
                        > I followed everyones advice and asked a few questions and gave
                        >
                        > some info and replied back to him. I did not hear from him for
                        >
                        > a good while. I resent the message, not knowing if he got the
                        >
                        > first one. He immediately replied saying that he was too busy.
                        >
                        > One of the question that I had asked was "What town or village
                        >
                        > are you from?" In his reply saying that he was busy, he didn't
                        >
                        > give an answer to this question. I have not heard from him since.
                        >
                        > Eleanor
                        >
                        >
                        >
                        >
                        >
                        > ---------------------------------
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