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september 15 bout recap

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  • zombielicious@comcast.net
    Sorry for the delay--vacation, national, and computer issues! By Statisfyer and Zombie Licious As football fans celebrated the kickoff to the gridiron season,
    Message 1 of 1 , Oct 3, 2007
      Sorry for the delay--vacation, national, and computer issues! 
      By Statisfyer and Zombie Licious

      As football fans celebrated the kickoff to the gridiron season, baseball fans counted down to the playoffs, and basketball and hockey fans started to think about season tickets, an early autumn chill filled the air in the Delaware Valley, and roller derby fans packed the Sportsplex in Feasterville, PA to see the Philthy Britches take on the Heavy Metal Hookers.  This highly anticipated bout could have easily gone either way, and both teams were wary of their opponents going into the evening's action, but - to the dismay of the amassed sea of green a nd black Hookers devotees - the Britches took the game by a margin of 85 to 54.  The bout featured incredible defense and strategy from the women in green, as they held the usually-explosive Britches offense to its lowest output since the team�s first bout in April of 2006.  Not to be outdone, the Britches answered with hard hitting and solid pack work of their own, and in turn limited their opposition to 5 points fewer than they allowed the last time the teams went head-to-head.  With just two full-length sessions all night, lead status had a major impact upon the pace of the game: short jams with one or fewer scoring passes that were punctuated by preemptive defensive calls made it clear from early on that neither team was going to get within striking distance of the century mark.


      The first jam of the bout pitted the teams' co-captains against one another as the Hookers' Robin Drugstores faced off against the Britches' Mo Pain.  Perhaps a good luck omen for Mo, her father was given the Birthday-honor of blowing the opening whistle.  She gave him something to be proud of as he returned to his seat between jams: she called off the action just 41 seconds after his whistle with 3 points in her favor, and denied Drugstores so much as a chance at a scoring pass.  Time after time, the Hookers have seen the Britches' convert a small early-game success into an insurmountable lead.  Knowing she had to answer quickly, Wendy Whiplash made sure to offset her team's first-jam trouble by turning the tables on Britches jammer Gloria Grindem with a 3-0 run of her own - in spite of the fact that it was Gloria, not Wendy, who had been designated lead jammer.  Violet Temper put on the star in the third jam and celebrated her birthday by starting a 4-jam, 17-point scoring run for the Britches, during which the team captured lead jammer status each time.  Following Violet's 4-point performance, Mo Pain was able to lap Hookers' jammer Euro Thrash for an extra point, further demonstrating the defensive teamwork for which the Britches are known.  In the seventh jam, the Hookers sent Mandawar to the line against Violent Temper.  Though she was without a teammate in the pivot slot to start the jam, Mandawar was named lead jammer, scored 4 points to Violet's 1 and quickly called off the jam after exactly a minute to put an end to the Britches' run. After taking a jam off, she returned to the jammer line and put up the same numbers against Mo Pain - only this time it was the Britches without a pivot, due to a Tripping major that sent Gloria Grindem to the penalty box in the previous jam.  In the eleventh jam, Mandawar not only earned lead, she also lapped Gloria Grindem in her first scoring pass to gain another unanswered 5 points for the Hookers. Mandawar's 13 points in 3 jams did a great deal to close the gap for the Hookers, and made Britches fans uneasy as their favorite team's early lead dwindled to 7 points, but the Britches captains would not allow this margin narrow any further.  Mo Pain jammed next against Hookers' captain Ivana Rock, to earn 4 and hold Ivana scoreless.  In the final jam of the first period, Violet Temper gained lead jammer status and pocketed 5 points in one scoring pass to end the first period with the score at 33 to 17 in favor of the Britches.


      The second period started with the each team sending out its best first-period performer: Mandawar took the line against Mo Pain, but this time it was Mo who would dictate the outcome while Manda struggled to clear the pack and was eventually sent off the track to watch the action from the penalty box: meanwhile, Mo was able to circle around for a game-high three scoring passes and skated off the track after two minutes with a 10-0 performance in her favor.  Mandawar returned from the box midway through the following jam, but fared little better at the hands of Violet Temper, who called off the action and gave her team a 5-0 boost.  Ivana Rock gained the Hookers lead jammer advantage in the third jam, but and was able to increase her team's score by only one point over Mo Pain before calling off the jam.  Likewise, Robin Drugstores earned lead jammer status for the Hookers in the fourth jam, but was only able to convert it into two points before calling - but Violet Temper had already scored another 5 points.  The following 2 jams saw the Britches scoreless, while the Hookers scored 5 points in 2 jams.  Wendy Whiplash and Violet Temper squared off on the jammer line in the seventh jam of the second period.  Wendy was able to get 4 points before ending the jam and preventing any improvement on the scoreboard for the Britches.  Dara Licks took to the jammer line against Mandawar in the eighth jam and although she was declared lead jammer, Mandawar was able to score 5 points to Dara's 3 before Dara called it off as both jammers were in their second scoring pass of that jam.  The Britches shut out the Hookers in the next 2 jams with another 6 points and a pair of lead jammer declarations resulting in short jams.  The last jam of the period saw Mo Pain against Robin Drugstores.  Mo gained lead jammer status, but Robin put up better numbers with 3 points to Mo's 2.  After 40 minutes of derby action, the score stood at 64 for the Britches and 37 for the Hookers.


      The third period saw Mo Pain start for the Britches and Wendy Whiplash for the Hookers.  This time it was the Hookers' jammer who took the title of lead jammer and called it off after fifty-one seconds and both teams gaining a single point.  The next jam saw another tied outcome, only it was a score of zero to zero for Violet Temper and Mandawar with lead jammer, Violet Temper, calling it after fifty-four seconds of jam time.  Mo Pain jammed every other jam for the next eight jams, each time earning four points each time out and earning lead jammer three of th ose four jams.  The Hookers had a notable jam in the fifth when they sent Mick Jabber, who seldom wears the star, to the line and she scored three points for her team.  Another highlight of the third period for the Hookers was in the twelfth and next to last jam when Robin Drugstores gained lead jammer status, but kept the jam alive shutting out Gloria Grindem with a score of 8to 0 in two full minutes that had Hookers' fans on their feet.  After a scoreless final jam of the evening, the Philthy Britches were the winners over the Heavy Metal Hookers by a score of 85 to 54.


      High scorers for the Philthy Britches were Mo Pain with 52 points in fourteen jams and Violet Temper with 28 points in thirteen jams.  High scoring Heavy Metal Hookers were Mandawar with 19 points in ten jams, Robin Drugstores with 14 points in six jams, and Wendy Whiplash with 13 points in nine jams.  Ivana Rock continued to dominate the defense for the Hookers and was credited with twelve blocks, while Euro Thrash, Mick Jabber, and Robin Drugstores were all noted for having seven blocks apiece.  The Britches were credited with more assists than blocks.  Dara Licks was the Britch who left the most marks on the stat sheet with seven blocks and three assists.


      Penalties seemed to hurt the Hookers slightly in the second period. They were already skating with a roster that was shorter than the Britches by two players, and the team sent skaters to the penalty box eleven times in that period, while the Britches sent skaters to the box only four times.  Both the first and third period were closer in penalty assessment, although the Hookers lost Drop Dead Red in the third period: she was ejected due to an accumulation of penalties (21 minors, 3 majors) with six minutes to go in the bout.


      The Philly Roller Girls' next bout is Saturday, October 20th: the event is an all-team double header, and will be the last action prior to the 2007 Season Championship bout on Saturday, November 10th.

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