#3684 - Tuesday, October 13, 2009 - Editor: Jerry Katz
- #3684 - Tuesday, October 13, 2009 - Editor: Jerry Katz
The Nonduality Highlights - http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NDhighlightsonce you lose the ego/fear .you are a wanderer in this flesh and will be placed in situations/around people where the emcee must be flexible .the rule is there is no rules .just go with the flow or dont but its all irrelevant to discuss cuz there will be no end to it or there will be or .-SayanAbout SayanBegan DJing in '97. Got hustled for a pair of used Technic 1200's with all sorts of problems in some LA alley by this shady dude who looks like one of the lil' homie figurines. Started off spinning underground hip hop then gradually move into the club scene in 2004 in the LA area. Moved up to the Bay in 2005 and continued doing clubs here.Non-duality as illustrated by RumiGah dar talab-e vasl, moshavash baasheem
Gaah az ta'ab-e hejr, dar aatash baasheem
Chon az man-o to, een man-o to paak shavad
Angah man-o to, bee man-o to, khosh baasheemAt times we seem disturbed on the path of union.
At times we scorch in the fire of the pain of separation.
When this illusion of you-and-I disappears from me-and-you
Then me-and-you, without the veil of you-and-I, will live in bliss(Blessings to Leslie-Ann Thomas for this . . .)
Posted by Sam Noel Pearce at 4:03 PM
A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to interview Pema Chodron, the author of When Things Fall Apart, in a retreat cabin in Crestone, Colorado. The purpose of the interview was to create a question and answer session to be included in an upcoming Sounds True program by Pema entitled Unconditional Confidence: Instructions for Meeting Any Experience with Trust and Courage.
The very first question I asked Pema was How do you define this term, unconditional confidence, and is it really possible to be confident in every situation? Her response stunned me. She said, Unconditional confidence really means unconditional gentleness, and yes, we can train so that we are gentle with ourselves in the face of whatever is happening.
When Pema gave this answer, I exited in a certain kind of way. Everything turned white; it was similar to a blackout, but it was a white-out. The experience was brief, and I kept listening and moving along with the interview, but at the same time something had hit a deep nerve in me, and I wasnt quite sure what the nerve was. It was as if her answer slapped me in the face.
Since the interview, I have been investigating internally the connection between gentleness towards myself and confidence in the world. The first thing I have seen is how many times a day I say something to myself that is ungenerous and even mean. I am sure this has been going on for, well, a lifetime, but the truth is I had never seen it so clearly before. Usually the commentary is about something minor: Why werent you more articulate during that conference call?, Why did you say such and such to that person?, and on and on. But sometimes this inner commentator takes on bigger issues, in a more aggressive way. You will never be able to open your heart fully because it hurts too much, or You are not a real businessperson because you react instead of plan, or other such indictments.
During the interview, I asked Pema what to do in these kinds of instances, times when we are just not gentle with ourselves. Her instruction was to interrupt the self-talk any way you can. I took the question further: what if interrupting this inner voice just doesnt work? What if the situation feels impossible, and this mean voice is persistent, like a radio you cant turn off? Her response was very direct and clear: drop the storyline and feel the underlying energy.
I have found this technique to be extremely effective (when I can remember to do it!). Dropping the storyline is like a thunderclap. A gap is created and what remains is pure energy.
At a certain point, this energy finds a direction. It moves. A friend of mine who is a psychiatrist once said to me something he learned through the therapeutic exchange, Even if you say something you regret, what really matters is what you say next. It is all about what you do next.
And this is what I have discovered about the connection between gentleness to myself and confidence in the world. When I am gentle towards myself, I take the next action that is needed in the situation; gentleness allows me to be resourceful and responsive. If I know I can count on being kind to myself, then I can risk failure. I can step into a new challenge, knowing that no matter how the situation turns out, I will be able to extend again and again. These days, I am consciously cultivating this kind of unconditional gentleness towards myself because this is exactly the kind of confidence I need.