#3416 - Sunday, January 18, 2009
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Nonduality Highlights: Issue #3416, Sunday, January 18, 2009
Adya at Omega 2007
Adya reads a letter written to him by "me." That's who signed it. Since is it from "me" I guess I have permission to read it.
I will try to keep this clear and concise. I came to this retreat half-attached to you as an identity and I am going home with myself.
I realize now why all the great masters and saints allowed a brief immersion in the teachings then banished them out into the world. The teaching is simple, it is basic, it is fundamental.
The mind can play out infinite examples of questions, sermons, but in the end the root is the same. This is not something we can intellectualize. It must be our direct experience.
Then I hear your voice in my head; "What a great good fortune."
Because without this understanding I would have become attached to the teachings, the teacher, and wasted a lot of time and money pursuing the finger. (laughter)
I have been on quite a journey this week, seeing how belief is a hot coal, sensing that deeply but this morning I stumbled upon something even deeper, I AM SURRENDER.
As the sounds come; cicadas, the drip from our dorm shower, the flush of the toilet, the thought in the mind, the pain in the hip, all of it happens spontaneously with "me-surrender."
There is no choice; it is happening. Then the mind kicks in and says but "wait, what about me. Don't I have a say in all of this?"
And surrender sees that thought with the same degree of acceptance and presence as the sound of the conch for meals.
I am that Awareness. The big fear was, when I go home; how to be in the world, deal with my husband and kids but now I see the awareness just is and it doesn't matter whether I sit in silence in meditation or play patty cake with my daughters,
I am surrender.
Thank you, Adya.
- Adyashanti, at Omega 2007, Disk 15, posted to The_Now2
It's a wild ride over here. From one moment to the next, I die into Love's arms, content and serene. I disappear into the nothing, joyously, willingly, laying it all down, and so far, in the next moment I'm reborn. I surrender it all, everything I ever thought I was, or wished I would someday be, everything I have ever wanted, everything I have defended against or resisted. To heck with all that other stuff, I'll take the love. And then, if called for, I'll gladly give that up as well. It's done. Game over. "Ollie, ollie, oxen free. Come out, come out, wherever you are."
I feel like a Leprechaun who became bored with hiding his pot of gold. Now I skip through the countryside, tossing out my love-trinkets to anyone I find. "Here, want some? Take all you want. I have way more than I could ever use. There's an unending supply. Every time I reach into the bucket... there's more! Here, take some home with you."
"She" comes into my heart and fills me to the brim, spilling her endless love everywhere; and then, the next day, the love is still there. The peace hasn't gone anywhere. Maybe a little bit evaporates, I'm not sure. It doesn't seem so. But then she comes into my heart again, and resets the bar. On a scale of 1-10, from here, I can't even see what used to be my 10.
The prodigal son has returned home, and where he thought he might find wrath over his disrespectful departure, he finds nothing but love, and joy, and a celebration over his homecoming. His every wish is fulfilled, and he wishes only for what is. "Oh, this is what God had in mind. Silly me. I had some other story about what should be. I've been such a fool." It seems that my love is no longer dependent on projected images or the content of a story.
I'm done for. I surrender. You got me. I give. Take me. I'm yours. Do as you wish with me. Take anything you want from me. Having become nothing, I have become everything. In surrendering myself, I have become invincible. What an incredible paradox. I am fearless, knowing that no harm could possibly come my way...
- frankspeare (Frank Carson Boyd), posted to The_Now2
Nukunu on surrender:
... and a cover version of Gnarls Barkley's song "Crazy":