2NDS - Digest #2
- Jun 4, 1999From the NondualitySalon, June 3, 1999
<< There is enough literature on the issue of jivan mukta to construct a
reliable picture of a fully realized one. Swami Sivananda gave a few of
those pictures. You can't stop thinking - only temporarily suspend thinking,
unless you're fully realized :)
I have stopped trying to stop thinking.
Instead I keep noticing what I am thinking IN.
I am thinking in limitless silence.
I am seeing thoughts rise and fall, and the seeing and the seen are
in limitless silence.
The thoughts, the seeing, the seen are rising from limitless silence.
And the previous boundaries of what is thought and what is seen
are melting away
in this silent, inner laughing.
How do you identify yourself?
If not "form" then person, woman, mother, daughter, smart person, waco?
If it has qualities in comparison to others, it is form.
If it has boundaries - this is me, this is not me, it is form.
If it has birth and death and changes, it is form.
Sometimes I wonder if I am understanding something quite abstract from
everyday thought in the simple observation of watching my dog jump onto the
couch this morning, a hidden analogy, so strange and so exciting, like
being tickled delightfully, but then thought enters and something
enchanting slips away.
My experience of a profound loveact, was that while losing myself, i found
THAT. Since, a sense of wellbeing and joy spreading my body is
everpresent. Somehow sexual energy was released from the downflow, from
being sexual and is now - lifesustaining energy. Which doesn't mean i
don't enjoy sex anymore, on the contrary, there is a knack of losing
myself which makes the loveact into the sweetest meditation.
I've never thought about my longing in terms of romantic or even sexual.
But i think you are right. It is the longing for union, fullfillment.
There are limits, and the limits are form, whatever shape. Having come
to one limit, one knows all limits. What's then left to attract is the
Mind could be called a receiver of thoughts (they are not "created") and it
is already equipped with an excellent steerable antenna called
onepointedness. In order to avoid errors in copying and to receive even the
weakest of signals, you can only lower the receiver's noise-figure :)
When I was in the waiter business in Los Angeles I waited on many stars,
and I found it real cool, but what I didn't like about it is that I
found myself thinking, 'Gee, I'm waiting on so-and-so,' and then I'd
forget to bring the Nicoise salad to the regular guy at table number 12.
I found that when I was trying to do what had to be done, the famous
people were a distraction and mentally upsetting. Eventually I learned
to not let it bother me.
Waitering in a very busy restaurant that catered to a cross section of
humanity is a very tough training ground for strengthening the mind, if
you can do it without drinking, smoking, gambling or caffeine. I spent
about 8 years in that stressful training ground, every second I was
there I made a conscious effort to attend to consciousness. That was my
real job there.
So when I left waitering after some 8 years, it was a cinch to keep
attending to consciousness once the stress was gone. Nondual perception
just fell into place. It was easy.
So my point, Tim, is that I understand the feeling of 'tension' you had,
and to remind you that we have to hear Thaddeus Golas' words: No
resistance. They're very hard to hear.
Also from Jerry:
The teacher is almost always going to tell you the
opposite of what you want to hear. It's a method. It's a way of throwing
you off balance, of pushing you into the void. That's his job.
Thanks Gill for that beautiful gem of a translation of Rumi's ghazal number
1419 by Nader Khalili. Will forward................Harsha
From: "Gillian Eardley" <gilleardley@...>
I WAS READY TO TELL
the story of my life
but the ripple of tears
and the agony of my heart
wouldn't let me
i began to stutter
saying a word here and there
and all along i felt
as tender as a crystal
ready to be shattered
in this stormy sea
we call life
all the big ships
board by board
how can i survive
riding a lonely
with no oars
and no arms
my boat did finally break
by the waves
and i broke free
as i tied myself
to a single board
though the panic is gone
i am now offended
why should i be so helpless
rising with one wave
and falling with the next
i don't know
if i am
while i exist
but i know for sure
when i am
i am not
when i am not
then i am
now how can i be
coming to life again
since in this world
i have many times
like my own imagination
been born again
that is why
after a long agonizing life
as a hunter
i finally let go and got
hunted down and became free
~Rumi, ghazal number 1419,
translated April 17, 1991,
by Nader Khalili
Marcia fowarded this quote from
"All men's miseries derive from not being able to sit quietly in a room
<< Didn't appear 'on the scene' as a 'blank' either. >>
Yes. I think we often assume the purity of consciousness as Self is solely
the blankness of absolute, Brahman. In these days of increasing awakening we
discover that even as forms with qualities the quality-less reality of
ourselves has been here as us all along.
Judi offers a Hafiz poem:
Come to my house late at night -
Do not be shy.
Hafiz will be barefoot and dancing
I will be
In such a grand and generous mood!
Come to my door at any hour,
Even if your eyes
Are frightened by my light.
My heart and arms are open
And need no rest -
They will always welcome you.
Come in my dear,
From the harsh world
That has rained elements of stone
Upon your tender face.
Should receive a toast from us
Bring all the bottles of wine you own
To this divine table - the earth
If your cellar is empty,
This whole Universe
Could drink forever
Let's dine tonite with exquisite music.
I might even hire angels
To play - just for you.
Hidden beneath your feet
Is a Luminous Stage
Where we are meant to rehearse
Our Eternal Dance!
And what price is the price of my Divine Instruction?
What could I ask of you?
All I could ever want
You have the priceless company
Who can Kiss God,
That you have the priceless gift
Of becoming a servant to the Friend!
Come to my window, dear world -
Why ever be shy?
Look inside my playful Verse,
For Hafiz is Barefoot and Dancing
And in such a Grand and Generous -
In such a Fantastic Mood.
Comments on the Hafiz poem....
It made me cry.
> From: Xanma@...And from Harsha.....
> Judi, this Hafiz poem wiped me out. Thanks. Xan
>Come to my house late at night -* Hafiz will be barefoot and dancing
>Do not be shy.
Hey guys. Hafiz just called. Forget the invitation
to his house tonight. He is soaking his feet in hot
water. Tired from the all the wild dancing.
Stepped on his cat accidentally. Kinda cranky and not
in a generous mood (the cat and Hafiz both).
Most of you could express this far better, I just
want to say that there is a group consciousness, a
presence here which is more than the sum of its parts.. There are way, way
too many posts to actually reply to
a fraction of those I would like to..
but while reading them, there is always a response in my heart. I'd be more
likely to say that this list is only 10% what is written here, and the
other 90% is happening in silence.
> From: Xanma@...[...]
>That sounds like a profound teaching in nondualism. Communicating with
> The "Kinship" book tells the story of a dog who lead his
> dog-sitter on walks
> to give him certain views and consequent experiences. Also of telepathic
> communication with ants. Of an intimate connection with an
> ordinary fly who
> somehow managed to live much longer than the few usual days.
> Great stories!
animals symbolizes communicating with the "sleeping part" of oneself and
because there is only Self, no message is irrelevant and it is an active way
of waking up. So instead of joking about Self having an endless monologue,
one could say every message is two-way communication until one finally can
draw the big circle on the Venn-diagram that encloses all beings and only
then, silence is absolute communication :)
> I guess you've heard of Findhorn and the telepathic and energicNever heard of that one - the moles always told me they were constructing a
> that went on with vegetables in the garden - growing better than usual in
> poor soil conditions - as well as with moles and other garden
> pests. Once
> the idea of separation is confronted and abandoned, limits to
> fall away.
golf-course and the cauliflower stood in the way :)
I remember a day recently when my son was telling me a long involved
something and my attention was drifting.
I decided that instead of trying to listen when I didn't want to I would
just be present to him. For a few
seconds that just felt better. Then suddenly the universe opened up for me
and I saw my thoughts as little wriggling movements in a very small space
within it. I think I'll do that just being present to a person more often.
Even the attributeless can be given attributes by the human mind (when that
happens, the mind is worshipping or envisioning "personal God," in a sense,
so giving imaginary attributes to the attribute-less is not so silly as one
might first suspect. In fact, it can ultimately be an aid to realizing
that which has no attributes.
I'm thinking now of the sort of loneliness of being surrounded by a
population who knows nothing of awakening or communion in stillness. I know
my task is to continue absorbing my awareness in silence until I am constant
in seeing only mySelf no matter where I look. A work in progress.