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MEFA Reviews for Tuesday, September 2, 2008

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  • annmarwalk
    Title: Fatherhood · Author: annmarwalk · Genres: Humor: Drabbles · ID: 547 Reviewer: Nancy Brooke · 2008-09-02 15:24:18 This is a wonderful portrait, all
    Message 1 of 1 , Sep 2, 2008
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      Title: Fatherhood · Author: annmarwalk · Genres: Humor: Drabbles · ID: 547
      Reviewer: Nancy Brooke · 2008-09-02 15:24:18
      This is a wonderful portrait, all the more so for its brevity. The use
      of this very intriguing moment, particularly since you choose to place
      it so early in the story and before fanon convention, you give your
      Imrahil a chance to be posessive and loving father, sensible
      statesman, and forward-thinking strategist. Where many writers are
      hampered by limits, you make this drabble bring out the best in your
      story.

      Title: Fit for a King · Author: Imhiriel · Times: Fourth Age and
      Beyond: Fixed-Length Ficlets · ID: 217
      Reviewer: Nancy Brooke · 2008-09-02 15:26:50
      What a lovely little vignette this is! I really enjoyed the image of
      the three men leaning on the fence, sucking straw like everyday
      cowhands, but more than this you give us their comeraderie, and a bit
      of mearas culture to boot. Very nice.

      Title: Seven Stones and Seven Stars and One White Tree · Author:
      shirebound · Races: Other Beings · ID: 121
      Reviewer: Marta · 2008-09-02 16:12:12
      This series of vignettes gives a refreshingly original portrait of
      some of the canonical scenes. The POV was well-established and
      affectively utilized, and added some depth to canon scenes I thought I
      knew everything about that there was to know. Writing from the POV of
      non-sentient characters is always a challenge, and I had my breath
      taken away by just how natural it seemed in these three pieces.

      Title: Dirty Jobs · Author: Pearl Took · Genres: Humor: Shire · ID: 232
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 18:42:08
      i found this to be an absolute genuis idea. yes i can imagine an
      entrepenuear going out and using this idea to make a million dollar
      business of selling people the concept and then waiting to see how
      long it takes them to realize that only so many people can get rich
      selling the idea, some of them will only get rich practicing the
      idea.and of course if you are busy eight to fourteen hours a day
      practicing then you really would not need the tweve million dollar
      mansion, and twenty four carat gold flatware and the mithril serving
      dishes. let alone the trips to milan and paris to pick out the latest
      haute couttier. yes this is something i can see pippin wrapping his
      astute little brain around and making a dead run at his goal. the fact
      that he surpasses his mark is not even out of the question. here is a
      leader that leads from the front of the pack, he isn't going to sit
      back and make someone else carry his load. i think you do a marvelous
      job with the back biting and snickers. when paladin hears them he
      knows but one way to deal with them, go to the source. you give father
      and son a wonderful platform on which to perform and you write a
      wonderful, thoughtful, provoking story about them growing and shaping
      each other. once more you are the master of your craft.

      Title: I Ain't Got Nobody · Author: Ignoble Bard · Genres: Humor:
      Valar & Maiar · ID: 568
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 19:02:15
      [ain't no body got me] my best line and technically it doesn't count.
      i'm not real fond of the style of write a songline write a chunk of
      story, another line, next chunk. but this is one of those little
      stories that you find yourself humming even days after you read it. i
      always knew that the fantasy graceful, enduring, and everlasting elf
      was FANTASY but i think i've met thet klutz somewhere recently. oh
      yeah moved the curtain in the bathroom this morning. must talk to my
      namo it may be time for some refresher art courses if this is what i
      get after owwies. i want what your namo shares. well....maybe not all
      five courses, if thats what it takes to be drop dead gorgegous i may
      have to pass on some of the wonders, not build for that kind of thing
      and way out of shape to try. i do wonder is there a backstory of the
      machine somewhere, sometime. ps you hurried down to the patent office
      and sheltered the ride, didn't you? if not you could lose a bundle
      when they start building them at the amusement parks. there are people
      who could use a good jolt in the nose/ but thats a whole nother
      storyline / i really think if people would read it straight through
      and suspend judgements until the end, you could have a big <b>big</b>,
      BIG hit on your hands this is too cute for words .....hmm know any
      good artist?

      Title: The Blessing · Author: Golden/Pearl Took CoAuthors · Genres:
      Longer Works · ID: 511
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 19:27:09
      here is a wonderfully complex story, that deals with "real lfe" after
      being troll smashed.this is not the first piece that i have read about
      what injuries would realistically happen from a squishing. it is far
      and away the most thorough though. golden and pearl took explore the
      issuses one by one and explain them to outsiders and suffers alike. i
      think that they may have given themselves to much time to deal with
      one before another one crops up but it is a pleasure read not a
      medical guide. the issues that they let come to light are more
      truthful maybe then if they let their healers tell everyone every
      horror that they might have to deal with. its like the disclaimer
      before surgery, is it really reasonable to expect your doctor to
      detail all the potential outcomes; not once have i heard the doctor
      say and i could drop dead of a heart attack or stroke, leaving you on
      the table wide open and half finished. and yes if you tell some one
      there may be mice in the kitchen you can bet that they'll see movement
      out of the corners of their eyes. golden and pearl took take a much
      more hobbity step in giving the story time to develop and move and
      twist and turn, they realize that long term care of chronic
      conditions, lead to troubles of its own and i appaud them for their
      handling of the subject. like serinde and phantom pain i think that
      this maybe something you have to live with to truly understand. good
      luck, ladies.(geussing, if i'm wrong; sorry sir)

      Title: The Six-Fingered Glove Mystery · Author: shirebound · Genres:
      Mystery · ID: 522
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 19:50:25
      the first time i read this i laughed and laughed and laughed. how many
      b movies and tv series, let alone the great "one-armed man hunt" have
      you just ruined; they will never be haunting again cause now i know
      the horrible truth. how shocking, revolting ( but not disgusting) and
      down right bizarre your mind's lint trap must be. you find the cutest
      ways to keep the little hobbits active and entertained out of momma's
      way for the afternoon. i don't believe you have ever posted anything
      that i haven't enjoyed and i hope that the trend will continue for
      many seasons of the sun. without giving the plot away, i believe its
      safe to say that they could have spend many years, checking out every
      crowd and searched the length and breath (wrong word but it sounds
      likre this one) of middle earth to find the mysterious stranger. what
      an epic thriller you could have filmed. WHO was that gloved one? WHAT
      was the gloved ones intentions, good or evil? to what lengths will he
      go to get his glove back? i don't imagine that tolkien would have much
      to add to this but how about peter max the eighties artist could you
      not envision artwork with a six fingered glove and psuecodelic swirls
      leading out to potential solutions, went back to check something else
      out and was reminded you do make a point of fingered glove, that does
      ratchet it up a bit more; is there a reason you do not specify which
      sided it was. i mean left handed compliment and all aside that if you
      are being politically correct and not poking at left handed people i
      may want to cut back on some rheotiric? sorry got a little into this one.

      Title: One Step More - The Heroism of Frodo Baggins · Author:
      ConnieMarie · Genres: Non-Fiction: Character Studies · ID: 395
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 20:11:43
      i hope you understand the fact that you made it here to be voted on
      says something about your work (even more if you are not self
      nominated). this is a caterogy that i have little or no contact with.
      i worried that i would be out of my depths. while some of your
      competeters were more aloof and nearly unreadable your work shows that
      not only do you walk the walk you talk the talk. perhaps we should
      start calling this a new genre of hero. you have action heroes, you
      have anti-heros, why don't we call frodo the anthem hero. he doesn't
      need to fight the fight, he needs to avoid the fight, it isn't that he
      doesn't care about what happens to the world (my view of anti-), its
      that he cares too much about too many. he wants every note, every
      syllable to be perfect and clear so that everyone gets to live a
      simple life, without land disputes and turf wars. sure occasionally
      you need to clarify a boundary but mostly we just see hobbits farming
      the land and tending their flocks. you write a detailed and logical
      paper that while not every earning you millions should make you
      friends of billions. you give your opinion and you never say this is
      the only way it should be just that its the way you see it. realizing
      that noone else ever stands in your shoes the way you do may help you
      to become rich and famous in what ever course you plot for your life.
      good luck and keep looking through your glasses the rose colored ones
      are over rated.

      Title: Yrch Song · Author: Phyncke · Genres: Poetry · ID: 564
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 20:32:20
      when i started this project, i made a couple of rules for myself: read
      outside the box, keep an open mind, only write reviews of ten points.

      well after this one and maybe a few others, we're going to rewirte the
      rules of nancy: except tor wips, read everything- you just never know.
      try to find a mind eraser on the next trip to the store, and go back
      later and give a few small shots of applause.

      i am fussy about what i think is poetry, there i said it outloud. now
      will you find something to take this image out of my head.

      there is this BIG, ugly, not too hairy yrch in a cheerleading skirt,
      jumping up and down waving his/her popmpoms and singing your song as
      in the background the troupe of yrchs practice building pyramids and
      knocking them down. of course they are building the pyramids with
      pretty elves and using giant dwarf axes to bring them down.

      now i ask you is this a nice thing to do to your reading public? where
      am i to tuck the glee club in at night, the balrogs are under the bed,
      the water thing-y took over the john. there's screaming hobbits in the
      closets afraid somenone is going to out them. i just don't know where
      else to turn for imaginary advise, how could you do this to me? i want
      your mothers e mail address im going to tell her what you did.

      Title: Spiced Wine On A Snowy Day · Author: Nieriel Raina · Races:
      Elves: Other Fixed-Length Ficlets · ID: 558
      Reviewer: Nancy Brooke · 2008-09-02 20:46:50
      This is a nice moment of peace. I like the way the conversation flows
      so naturally, instead of sticking to one subject.

      Title: Birthday Present · Author: Aranel Took · Genres: Drama: General
      Fixed-Length Ficlets · ID: 441
      Reviewer: Nancy Brooke · 2008-09-02 20:50:23
      Spoilers!
      This is a lovely idea, that what Pippin would want most from his
      Cousin Bilbo would not be a clock work toy from Dale, or even a
      trinket of dragon gold, but a story of adventure. Nicely done.

      Title: 25 Rethe, S.R. 1422: The Three Travellers Remember · Author:
      Dreamflower · Genres: Poetry: Drama · ID: 679
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 20:53:07
      up until i got invited to play here, i thought drabbles and hiaku were
      the biggest challenge to face, OMG!! this is poetry as art as true
      art. i can see this type of poetry written in frodo's best hand,
      stretched and mounted as a wedding or anniversary present. the visual
      appeal the texture of the writing the symetery and presentation. all
      just jump off the page and beg to be given a voice. this is something
      that if you held readings like i'm hearing about where people all
      gather up live and using the mystery of computers read the lotr
      outloud to each other. (need to refind that post and check into the
      possiblites) you would have standing room ony. dreamflower i don't
      know how you do it, you are so prolific as a writer and yet you seem
      to find the time to keep track of all the important dates in middle
      earth time and give each one a small salute as they pass. i have to
      believe that you have a really thick detail oriented dayplanner placed
      somewhere in your brain and that its open and accessable constantly.
      you must have a first class education also because you have so much
      knowledge and never come off as high-faluting either. if you weren't a
      rhodes scholar maybe you were or are a rogue scholar, scooping up
      little facts and tucking them securely away for later disposal.

      Title: Reflections in the Smoke · Author: Raksha the Demon · Times:
      Late Third Age: General Fixed-Length Ficlets · ID: 294
      Reviewer: Nancy Brooke · 2008-09-02 20:53:28
      Spoilers!
      What an interesting idea, to examine a moment when Galdalf/Olorin
      would first feel his task was done, and that the future was open.

      I like that the wind, the natural world of Eru, seems to speak to him
      and call him home.

      Title: Your Father Loves You · Author: Raksha the Demon · Races: Men:
      Pre-Ring War Fixed-Length Ficlets · ID: 424
      Reviewer: Nancy Brooke · 2008-09-02 20:58:36
      This is an incisive portrait, encompassing Denethor's tendency to
      regret, fear, and despair measured in eventualities even as he loves
      and is grateful.

      Title: The Captain's New Clothes · Author: Raksha the Demon · Genres:
      Humor: Other Fixed-Length Ficlets · ID: 421
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 21:08:47
      i wrote this really great wickedly witty review marked it final,
      pushed the save button and my carrier went off line for the long
      weekend.LOST, ITS LOST FOREVER. so to tryand recap. this is the story
      with that wonderful pitcure in the beginning. and i got to tell you
      that was the sell i bought that pitcure and could hardly wait to hear
      how it happened. even though the next entry had a pitcure where i
      could almost see aragorn's wzzzzzy this one was the clencher. i did
      find your choice of donor questionable, she is a woman of taste and
      discernment and i think has seen enough warriors to know that what is
      classy on the parade ground isn't necessarily practical in the field.
      but i did notice something while writing the first review(sob)
      (sniffle) that i wonder if you noticed. the guy in the background is
      in the same type of leggings, ps and look at his face not a thrilled
      camper. i understand his troops position on helping him out, you
      shouldn't upset rich older woman who give you goodies and especially
      if you aren't the one paying the piper. i think based on the beauty of
      this story you owe it to the world to go back to that calender and see
      if there are any more stories hidding out there, its a tough job but
      you have proven yourself more than capable of delivering the goodies.
      not as good as the first one but you get the idea: i liked your story!!!!

      Title: The Gardener Speaks · Author: Armariel · Genres: Poetry:
      Hobbits · ID: 428
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 21:24:14
      as i admitted to the other poetry author and the essay writer that i
      reviewed, this is maybe not my comfort zone. so if this sounds a
      little stilted its me not your work. pardons, please. in order to grow
      people need to reach out and try something different once in a while
      and once in those whiles you find something that makes you want to
      reach out even further. you have touched a chord in my emotions that i
      would like to explore more, thank you for presenting an idea that i
      like in a way that i might not have tried to use. this is a moving
      piece that explores the underpinings of frodo and sam, and let's it be
      just frodo and sam not egos and sex and competing and all those
      things. this is sam relating to this person who is currently the only
      person in his world (look around folks they are all alone out here) in
      a way that is completely and solely his. not his fathers not the
      shires not even the worldly view. this is a private moment that i feel
      priveledged to get to view. i can now think a little more samlike when
      i view the world, i have seen things from apoint of view that matters
      in ways that maybe mine doesn't because i am a selfish clod not a
      loving caring hobbit, but i can reach for it thanks to you giving me a
      road map. i hope ou find this as enlighting and experience as i have
      and i'm referring to the grand pitcure of mefa not eh medicore ravings
      of a nutcase. good luck.

      Title: Rebirth · Author: Aranel Took · Genres: Poetry: Late Third Age
      · ID: 471
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 21:42:16
      boy, i thought drabbles were hard to vote for; do you realize that to
      give you the fullest vote i can i need about thirty three and a third
      characters for every sylable you wrote? be prepared to be buried. i
      guess the first thing to say is if you relocated you could have had
      sam's help in the task you choose to highlight,(oh yeah, ps and all
      that i don't like the spoilers button either.) as it is you better be
      an elf cause other wise you may run out ot time. the rest of us have
      limited numbers of years to wait for these things to occur. of course
      where you are you maybe able to get an ent or two interested every
      little bit, but i understand that their actual attention span is not
      all that long just their speech patterns make it seem like it's going
      to take forever. (but catty thought,)

      truth: what you have written, in the way you have written it is so
      clear and pretty that i wish half of the world could take lessons, say
      what you mean say it quietly and soft spoken and see how many people
      end up hearing the echos of the thoughts bouncing around the universe.
      beautifully done. good luck and pleasant dreams for more inspiration.
      i will try to keep an eye on your site and learn more wonders of the
      world as the years progress, if you don't mind a lurker. promise no
      stalking.

      Title: Midnight · Author: EdorasLass · Genres: Romance · ID: 18
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 22:00:18
      i have an issue with you slash is male an male sexual connations. this
      is not slash if you had not specifically said theodred, no one could
      have assumed that. there is nothing that is thoughtspoken that is
      inherintly male. this could be a quite moment with some unkown shield
      maiden. (yeah right) okay so i buy the whole boromir wasn't dedicated
      to wooing the girls thing but i think to often people see the word
      slash and automatically cringe. this is a peice that should could and
      i think does call for main stream acceptance and reward. you have
      writen a moment in time that captures two people at their most joined
      outside of a sexual stimulation. i don't think theodred is thinking
      okay now wake him up and bang away i think that you show him wanting
      to give this moment of peace and rest to a frind that has been badly
      used and abused by the world lately. he is not thinking of himself or
      rewards or future glory, in fact in many ways he is not even thinking
      h is just easedropping on memories that happen to have visual cues
      that he is looking at, kind of like picking up a scrapbook while you
      sit on the couch waiting for the OTHER to finish dressing for the
      night on the town, you may not really be thinking at all its just busy
      hand and mind syndrome caatching up with you. and notice thoe's
      practicing no hands style right now. try that at sword practice!!!!

      Title: Call of the Wild · Author: annmarwalk · Genres: Romance:
      Drabbles · ID: 94
      Reviewer: nancylea · 2008-09-02 23:28:43
      Spoilers!
      well here i go again, babbling on a drabble, trying to give you a ten
      when you gave less than one hundred and one. see already i have gotten
      better, write everything out no abbreviations and no symbols whan i
      can make them words. i think your narrator is vastly overlooked in the
      writing communities and you make me eager to get to know more about
      her, maybe not as much as princess di but when she died i promised not
      to encourage papparazi by supporting their work. now i've found fanfic
      if it aint already written, write it as you go.

      your work is a treat to the eyes, this is very like i see theoden, a
      wild thing standing in full majesty and displayng his natural charm
      and abilites without apology or artifice. he needs to be idolized and
      deserves a queen of his own kind. not some civilized playmate. i can
      see him as that legendary twelve point buck. nothing anyone expects to
      see but if you do everyone thinks you maybe helping further the
      legend. in the least words do some people create the brightest pitcure
      i hate clicking that button but i have given your story away i fear. i
      had some quandries over your choice of animals to use but this is a
      specialized crowd and should be able to brush up on older names for
      species that appear fairly frequnetly in our masterpiece.
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