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Hello, I'm the newbie

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  • Katherine
    I am the new member and have always had a leaning towards the East. My husband is an excommunicated Catholic. He did not pay the RCC enough $$ to annul his
    Message 1 of 6 , Dec 31, 2008
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      I am the "new member" and have always had a leaning towards the East.
      My husband is an excommunicated Catholic. He did not pay the RCC
      enough $$ to annul his marriage. And of all things, he married me in
      a LCMS. He has always said that he was going to hell for marrying me
      (with a prior marriage) and him not being annulled.

      I have joined an ELCA church. I have had him to my ELCA church and he
      has said the message is better than what he was "brainwashed" whit
      regarding the RCC. I was hoping there might be a happy medium for him
      and I to worship at/with.

      Any suggestions?
      Katherine
    • randall hay
      My wife (nondenominational background) and I (Lutheran background) both did well when we became Orthodox. There is plenty reverence, none of the RC medieval
      Message 2 of 6 , Jan 1, 2009
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        My wife (nondenominational background) and I (Lutheran background) both did well when we became Orthodox. There is plenty reverence, none of the RC medieval errors, and a definite piety to guide us along.
        Kids too (at the time they were 8 and 10).... there is much for children. They can venerate icons, get blessed bread, commune etc. (Babies and children, since they are believers, are welcome to commune with everyone else.) Our 1-year old grandaughter bows when the priest censes in her direction.

        ---Anyhow, Orthodoxy never fell into the error of one-marriage-only-only-only-and-annulment, which so often has political dimensions and amounts to a de facto divorce. The church does everything it can to prevent divorce, of course, but people are people, we are all fallen sinners and can't force our spouses against their free will to stay happily married to us. The ancient Orthodox canons do allow for it.

        There are no ramifications at all for those who divorced before they became Orthodox (the only exception I can think of is when the man wants to be a priest, in certain archdioceses only.) There are no ramifications because Orthodoxy is in one sense a new world, a wondrous one full of paradisal possibilities, quite different in a inner way from other churches.

        I would suggest attending a local parish to see. For your first visit all you need to do is find a pew (or stand if you prefer). It takes a long time to learn what to do at various parts of the service, and everybody knows that, so all you need to worry about is observing prayerfully.

        In Christ,

        Subdeacon Randall












        ________________________________
        From: Katherine <kitanna59@...>
        To: LutheransLookingEast@yahoogroups.com
        Sent: Wednesday, December 31, 2008 7:23:28 PM
        Subject: [LutheransLookingEast] Hello, I'm the newbie


        I am the "new member" and have always had a leaning towards the East.
        My husband is an excommunicated Catholic. He did not pay the RCC
        enough $$ to annul his marriage. And of all things, he married me in
        a LCMS. He has always said that he was going to hell for marrying me
        (with a prior marriage) and him not being annulled.

        I have joined an ELCA church. I have had him to my ELCA church and he
        has said the message is better than what he was "brainwashed" whit
        regarding the RCC. I was hoping there might be a happy medium for him
        and I to worship at/with.

        Any suggestions?
        Katherine



        [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
      • Christopher Orr
        It sounds as if your husband is still quite bitter about his experience in the Catholic church. May the Lord help him heal and forgive. It has been my
        Message 3 of 6 , Jan 2, 2009
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          It sounds as if your husband is still quite bitter about his experience in
          the Catholic church. May the Lord help him heal and forgive.

          It has been my experience that one has to come to terms with one's past
          church/religion before being able to truly convert to Orthodoxy. Since much
          of the bitterness may stem from the RCC's teaching on divorce, perhaps the
          Orthodox Church's understanding that divorce and remarriage are allowed out
          of pastoral concern may be a help to him in forgiving Rome for a yoke that
          was too heavy for him to bear. Perhaps it will seem too similar to Rome to
          him, perhaps he is angry at God. God is always calling, always present,
          always seeking to heal, but sometimes we aren't ready for it, we don't yet
          want it; sometimes we can't not yet forgive. Pray for him, don't push or
          cajole him to join you. Just love him. One need not speak to preach.

          It has also been my experience that converting to Orthodoxy as a compromise
          does not 'take'. You should only convert if you find Orthodoxy to be the
          Church where resides the fullness of the Truth Himself, Jesus Christ.

          Both of you have and are going through experiences that have opened up to
          you the possibility of joining a church other than your own. This is not
          yet conversion. It is an opportunity to pray, to consider, to worship, to
          rethink your basic assumptions about God, about how we come to know Him and
          what he wants from us, what he wants to give to us. Take the opportunity.
          Take your time. Make no committments to each other or God, yet.

          For instance, it is often the case that western Christians see God as
          vengeful and demanding pain, suffering, blood. A Protestant may focus on
          forgiveness, but the fact that God even demanded Christ's death can sit in
          the back of our heads: is that what God is really like? someone that can't
          just forgive but who needs payment? The Roman Catholic understanding that
          salvation is not yet sure, that we have some part to play, etc. adds to this
          fear of a bloodthirsty God for whom I am not holy enough. These are
          assumptions about God and what He wants, how he works. It may be time to
          reconsider them. As an example, Orthodoxy would definitively not say that
          your husband is going to hell for remarrying - you or anyone.

          I agree with Randy: find a few local Orthodox parishes to visit. You and/or
          your husband should speak with the priest(s). Take it slow, take it easy,
          look around; while all Orthodox churches are Orthodox, finding a church is
          like finding a home, or finding a spouse - you need one that feels right to
          you, where you trust and love the people you share your lives with.

          Here is a parish locator - just type in your city or ZIP:

          http://orthodoxyinamerica.org/lr_v10/locator.php

          It's what I use when I travel.

          Christopher



          On Wed, Dec 31, 2008 at 7:23 PM, Katherine <kitanna59@...> wrote:

          > I am the "new member" and have always had a leaning towards the East.
          > My husband is an excommunicated Catholic. He did not pay the RCC
          > enough $$ to annul his marriage. And of all things, he married me in
          > a LCMS. He has always said that he was going to hell for marrying me
          > (with a prior marriage) and him not being annulled.
          >
          > I have joined an ELCA church. I have had him to my ELCA church and he
          > has said the message is better than what he was "brainwashed" whit
          > regarding the RCC. I was hoping there might be a happy medium for him
          > and I to worship at/with.
          >
          > Any suggestions?
          > Katherine
          >
          >
          >


          [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
        • phos_hilarion@hotmail.com
          Hi Katherine! I m glad to meet someone new on LLE. I ve found them to be a very helpful group and I hope you make good use of them. The blessings of our
          Message 4 of 6 , Jan 8, 2009
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            Hi Katherine! I'm glad to meet someone new on LLE. I've found them to be a very helpful group and I hope you make good use of them. The blessings of our Sweetest Lord Jesus to you and your husband.

            Love in Christ,
            phos

            To: LutheransLookingEast@yahoogroups.com
            From: kitanna59@...
            Date: Thu, 1 Jan 2009 00:23:28 +0000
            Subject: [LutheransLookingEast] Hello, I'm the newbie




















            I am the "new member" and have always had a leaning towards the East.

            My husband is an excommunicated Catholic. He did not pay the RCC

            enough $$ to annul his marriage. And of all things, he married me in

            a LCMS. He has always said that he was going to hell for marrying me

            (with a prior marriage) and him not being annulled.



            I have joined an ELCA church. I have had him to my ELCA church and he

            has said the message is better than what he was "brainwashed" whit

            regarding the RCC. I was hoping there might be a happy medium for him

            and I to worship at/with.



            Any suggestions?

            Katherine



















            _________________________________________________________________
            Windows Live�: Keep your life in sync.
            http://windowslive.com/howitworks?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_t1_allup_howitworks_012009

            [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
          • Dave @¿@¬
            Howdy Katherine! Since I am single I must plead ignorance. What I would suggest would be that you explore and discuss the alternatives TOGETHER. I followed the
            Message 5 of 6 , Jan 20, 2009
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              Howdy Katherine!

              Since I am single I must plead ignorance.

              What I would suggest would be that you explore and discuss the
              alternatives TOGETHER.

              I followed the path from LCMS to ELCA to a seeker to Orthodoxy.
              Orthodoxy seemed to be able to accomodate me as a seeker rather than
              forcing me to fit myself into "the doctrinal box."

              Dave

              --- In LutheransLookingEast@yahoogroups.com, "Katherine"
              <kitanna59@...> wrote:
              >
              > I am the "new member" and have always had a leaning towards the
              East.
              > My husband is an excommunicated Catholic. He did not pay the RCC
              > enough $$ to annul his marriage. And of all things, he married me
              in
              > a LCMS. He has always said that he was going to hell for marrying
              me
              > (with a prior marriage) and him not being annulled.
              >
              > I have joined an ELCA church. I have had him to my ELCA church
              and he
              > has said the message is better than what he was "brainwashed" whit
              > regarding the RCC. I was hoping there might be a happy medium for
              him
              > and I to worship at/with.
              >
              > Any suggestions?
              > Katherine
              >
            • Katherine
              ... Hello Dave, You put your thoughts down so simple! It s like the bell rang as I read your words! Being in East TN, my choices are far and few...there is a
              Message 6 of 6 , Jan 20, 2009
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                --- In LutheransLookingEast@yahoogroups.com, Dave @¿@¬ <dnaess@...>
                wrote:
                >
                > Howdy Katherine!
                >
                > Since I am single I must plead ignorance.
                >
                > What I would suggest would be that you explore and discuss the
                > alternatives TOGETHER.
                >
                > I followed the path from LCMS to ELCA to a seeker to Orthodoxy.
                > Orthodoxy seemed to be able to accomodate me as a seeker rather than
                > forcing me to fit myself into "the doctrinal box."
                >
                > Dave
                Hello Dave,
                You put your thoughts down so simple! It's like the bell rang as I
                read your words! Being in East TN, my choices are far and few...there
                is a Southern Baptist church almost on every corner....but, I have no
                desire for that...So, I'll take your words of wisdom to heart!

                Right now my husband is running the sound system every 3rd Sunday at
                my ELCA church....and recently he has been commenting positively about
                the words spoken...Maybe God is working on him?

                Again, I thank you for your advice....
                Katherine
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