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Humour - Lexiphiles

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  • Josney Silva
    Some classics in here ... Lexiphiles (lovers of words…you know—you can tune a piano, but you can t tuna fish or… I wondered why the baseball was getting
    Message 1 of 2 , Feb 1, 2011
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      Some classics in here
      ...

      Lexiphiles (lovers of words…you know—you can tune a piano, but you can't
      tuna fish or… I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit
      me….etc.

      To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

      When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

      A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

      When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A.

      The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky
      ground.

      The batteries were given out free of charge.

      A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

      A will is a dead giveaway.

      If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

      With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

      Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.

      You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

      Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.

      A boiled egg is hard to beat.

      When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

      Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a
      rest.

      Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all
      right now.

      If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

      A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

      In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count
      that votes.

      When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds

      The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

      He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

      Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

      When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

      Acupuncture: a jab well done.

      __._,_._
      Josney
      ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
      "Life moves pretty fast; if you don't stop and look around once in a while, you're gonna miss it" - 
      Ferris Bueller 



    • Susana Canelo
      ROFL. Thanks Susana ... De: Josney Silva Asunto: [LAMI.US] Humour - Lexiphiles Para: Fecha: martes, 1 de febrero de 2011, 22:59  
      Message 2 of 2 , Feb 2, 2011
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        ROFL.

        Thanks
        Susana

        --- El mar 1-feb-11, Josney Silva <josney.faryj@...> escribió:

        De: Josney Silva <josney.faryj@...>
        Asunto: [LAMI.US] Humour - Lexiphiles
        Para:
        Fecha: martes, 1 de febrero de 2011, 22:59

         


        Some classics in here
        ...

        Lexiphiles (lovers of words…you know—you can tune a piano, but you can't
        tuna fish or… I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit
        me….etc.

        To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

        When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

        A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

        When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A.

        The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky
        ground.

        The batteries were given out free of charge.

        A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

        A will is a dead giveaway.

        If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

        With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

        Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.

        You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

        Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.

        A boiled egg is hard to beat.

        When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

        Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a
        rest.

        Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all
        right now.

        If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

        A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

        In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count
        that votes.

        When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds

        The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

        He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

        Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

        When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

        Acupuncture: a jab well done.

        __._,_._
        Josney
        ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
        "Life moves pretty fast; if you don't stop and look around once in a while, you're gonna miss it" - 
        Ferris Bueller 




         
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