Loading ...
Sorry, an error occurred while loading the content.
 

Re: [LINUX_Newbies] Linux Airlines

Expand Messages
  • skylinux
    ... Hash: SHA1 ... THX alot, I love it. Export = Save = Keep Skylinux - --- Florida Shooters Network http://pub49.ezboard.com/bfloridashootersnetwork - ----
    Message 1 of 6 , Oct 2, 2001
      -----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
      Hash: SHA1

      On Tue, 2 Oct 2001, Jim Purcell wrote:

      > I had to share this from a comparison to various OSs to airlines:
      >
      > Jim
      >
      > Linux Air
      > .....

      THX alot, I love it.
      Export => Save => Keep

      Skylinux
      - ---
      Florida Shooters Network
      http://pub49.ezboard.com/bfloridashootersnetwork
      - ----
      Support Linux Games
      http://www.lokigames.com/
      - ---
      (o_
      (o_ (o_ //\
      (/)_ (\)_ V_/_
      |~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|
      | Beware of the Penguin|
      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
      12:30pm up 2:06, 5 users, load average: 2.16, 2.47, 2.40
      -----BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE-----
      Version: GnuPG v1.0.6 (GNU/Linux)
      Comment: For info see http://www.gnupg.org

      iD8DBQE7uexU313jvLUYQ4gRAq/+AJ9gOmagPPlp9BY/v/ShYlvxMcf36wCg44UO
      HLoUx5BgnzJTPAYksKCdtSw=
      =Ymcv
      -----END PGP SIGNATURE-----
    • Jim Purcell
      More Funnies: This time it s error messages: Jim Classic Error Messages: * USER ERROR: replace user and press any key to continue. * Virus detected! P)our
      Message 2 of 6 , Oct 2, 2001
        More Funnies: This time it's error messages:

        Jim
        Classic Error Messages:

        * USER ERROR: replace user and press any key to continue.
        * Virus detected! P)our chicken soup on motherboard?
        * Backup not found! A)bort, R)etry or P)anic?
        * A)bort, R)etry, I)nfluence with large hammer.
        * Bad command or file name. Go stand in the corner.
        * DYNAMIC LINKING ERROR: Your mistake is now everywhere.
      • Jim Purcell
        Edw, ... Here it is: Jim ... Linux Air Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their own airline. They build the planes, ticket
        Message 3 of 6 , Oct 2, 2001
          Edw,

          > Love to see the entire comparison!

          Here it is:

          Jim
          ------------
          Linux Air
          Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their
          own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runways
          themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
          ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When you
          board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy of
          the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very
          comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a single problem,
          the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other
          airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is "You had to do what
          with the seat?"

          UNIX Airways
          Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport.
          They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece,
          arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be building.

          Air DOS
          Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let
          the plane coast until it hits the ground again. They the push again, jump
          on again, and so on...

          Mac Airlines
          All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look and
          act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are
          gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and
          everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just
          shut up.

          Windows Air
          The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage
          check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the
          air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

          WindowsNT Air
          Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and takes
          out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.
        • huntsouth@mindspring.com
          Another look at Linux Air: Disgruntled employees of One World Air (known as OW!) along with many from small, regional carriers like MAC (My! Airplane Company)
          Message 4 of 6 , Oct 3, 2001
            Another look at Linux Air:

            Disgruntled employees of One World Air (known as OW!) along with
            many from small, regional carriers like MAC (My! Airplane Company)
            , UNIX (Unknown National Interstate Express), and others decide to
            start their own airline.

            They divide into many different groups and start building runways,
            ticket counters, and planes.
            When they open for business, the tickets cost very little and you
            can even print your own. This is so much less expenxive than the
            other airline. And you can even use them at other airports, which
            the other airline won't allow.

            When you arrive at the airport, you find 27 ticket
            counters that all seem to be the same. The agents are helpful, or
            not, at random, but all kindly direct you to the runways where you
            find a group milling around a pile of airplane parts and a
            plane-HOWTO that weighs 247 lbs. Reading it is time consuming since
            each step is described in minute detail, giving the history of the
            part, how it was made, when it was made, who thought of it, what
            they were doing when they thought of it, what it was made of, where
            that stuff came from, how it was mined, smelted, forged, shaped, cut
            and finished and it's probable, but not certain, relationship to all
            the other parts. After several days, you finally have something
            that looks like a plane. There is no charge for gas. Another
            kindly agent tells you you can take off any time.

            You are unsure about this since there seem to be 11 runways all
            going in different directions and quite a few piles of wreckage
            where planes have crashed (into the ground or into each other is
            unclear-your plane even looks suspicious, having two different wings
            and a jet engine on one side and a turbo-prop on the other.) You
            finally take off and make it into the air. You hardly notice this
            since you are busy assembling the interior of the plane. The seats
            are infinitely adjustable but it isn't until well into the flight
            that you finally get yours to the point where you can even sit down.
            As you open your in-flight meal, you are told that it is now your
            turn to go help fly the plane. There seems to be some uncertainty
            as to destination, partly because not all the passengers want to go
            to the smae place and partly because there was no compass installed
            when the plane was assembled.

            When you finally land (nobody wanted to push the "killall " button),
            you bump into a friend who went to the airport the same day. "How
            was your vacation?" you ask. "Fine" he says, "I got here a week ago
            and we've seen all the sights. You really should spend some time
            here."
            You would stay except that if the return trip takes as long as it
            took to get here, you will have used up all your vacation time for
            next year. On the otherhand, if your buddy's return trip takes as
            long as your journey, he'll get fired for showing up a week late!

            With apologies to the original writer. Written in Kword on Redhat7.1
            'cause my Windows airplane exploded in mid-air!

            Tom

            --- In LINUX_Newbies@y..., Jim Purcell <jpurcell@w...> wrote:
            > I had to share this from a comparison to various OSs to airlines:
            >
            > Jim
            >
            > Linux Air
            > Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to
            start their
            > own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the
            runways
            > themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing
            the
            > ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself.
            When you
            > board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a
            copy of
            > the seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is
            very
            > comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without a
            single problem,
            > the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the
            other
            > airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is "You had
            to do what
            > with the seat?"
          Your message has been successfully submitted and would be delivered to recipients shortly.