- We have all been there! It is a vicious cycle but remember that you have the strength to say NO. First of all, ask the L-RD for 4giveness and DON'T be too hard on URself. It's the adversary the ACCUSER of the brethren that would keep telling you how no good you are, to give up, ' I'm going to do it again so what the hell' attitude. ANYTHING to keep you in a defeated frame of mind. The adversary KNOWS what buttons to push to keep you from serving the Kingdom of Heaven (G-d). Ask yourself."Do I masturbate because I am bored?" "Lonely?" I know that you are married so is your wife satisfying your needs? Are you satisfying HER needs? One of the negative effects of porn and j--ing off is that the person in the porn is a fantasy, not a real person, per se. Those images are graven and recorded in your mind and then you 'peter' out (forgive the pun) with your wife or want to do something kinky to get it up. I know that it's difficult to pray and read the Word at times, but think about something that you're good at (sport/ability/skill/talent or even walking!) and think how it was difficult at first but the more you did it, the easier it got. When you were a baby you fell many times but you learned to walk, right? Now you walk without any effort. Find a brother in the group or in your church that you can pray with and to whom be accountable. I have found godly men in his group."Behold, G-d is my salvation [in Hebrew the word is Y'shua, Jesus' name]. I will trust and not be afraid" Isaiah 12"We are MORE than CONQUERORS..."Rms.8:37. The Greek word for 'conquerors'' means HYPERconquerors. Get grounded in the WORD and start believing and agreeing what G-d says about you, not what the accuser says about you. You have given the loser a free pass to kick you, so start agreeing what the WORD says about you, my friend.