KIDS' STUFF - VOLUME 19
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HUMOR FROM THE VALLEY
February 1, 2009
"A cheerful disposition is good for your health . . ."
Proverbs 17:22 (Message Translation)
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"I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have
hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to
"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little
children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore,
whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the
kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes a little child like this in
my name welcomes me." Matthew 18:3-5
"Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the
kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Matthew 19:14
So often, God has used some triumph or mistake we made as parents to
give us a deeper revelation of our relationship with Him. In a
moment of parental pride, He gave us a vision of some small act of
service we had done and the pride He'd felt at our first, feeble
attempts to follow Him. And in some moment of parental frustration,
when we felt like screaming, He gave us an equally sharp picture of
something we had done that made Him feel much the same frustration
toward us. Not only did He use each event to show us more about His
role as our heavenly Father, but He used them to show us more about
our role as His children.
As a way of celebrating that role and remembering our countless
blessings, we occasionally do an edition of "Humor from the Valley"
that focuses entirely on children. We call these editions "Kid's
Stuff." Mainly they're filled with humorous stories, but
occasionally we also include more serious stories sent in by our
contributors in celebration of children. We hope you will enjoy
reading this edition as much as we enjoyed putting it together. We
pray the articles will remind you of the way you used to be and the
heavenly Father who longs for you to be that way again.
I remain His way less than perfect child,
sheltered under His wing and overwhelmed by His love,
WELCOME TO THE NEIGHBORHOOD
(Received Pastor Tim's CleanLaugh)
We had spent the day moving from our farmhouse into our new house in
town. Early the next morning, a Saturday, our 3 ½ year-old ran into
our bedroom to wake us up. I dressed him and told him to play in the
yard and to quit bothering us.
About 20 minutes later, he came running back. "Mommy, Mommy," he
exclaimed, "everybody has doorbells - and they all work."
WHY DO YOU DRESS FUNNY ?
(Received from Net 153 Sunday Funnies)
A priest was walking along the corridor of the parochial school near
the preschool wing when a group of little ones was trotting by on the
way to the cafeteria. One youngster of 3 or 4 stopped and looked at
him in his clerical clothes and asked, "Why do you dress funny?"
The priest responded, "I'm a priest and this was the uniform priests
Then the boy pointed to the priest's plastic collar tab and
asked, "Do you have an owie?"
The priest was perplexed then realized that to the kid the collar tab
looked like a bandage. So the priest took it out and handed it to the
boy to show him. On the back of the tab were raised letters giving
the name of the manufacturer. The little guy felt the letters, and
the priest asked, "Do you know what those words say?"
"Yes I do," said the lad, well too young to read. Peering intently at
the letters he said, "Kills ticks and fleas up to six months!"
(Received from Horace Hooper)
Terri asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their
favorite bible stories. She was puzzled by Kyle's picture, which
showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it
was meant to represent. "The flight to Egypt," said Kyle.
"I see . . . And that must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus," Ms.
Terri said. "But who's the fourth person?"
"Oh, that's Pontius - the Pilot!"
The Sunday School Teacher asks, "Now, Johnny, tell me frankly do you
say prayers before eating?"
"No sir," Little Johnny replies, "I don't have to, my mom is a good
GIVE ME A MINUTE
(Received from GCFL)
A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while
they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's
artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently,
she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from the drawing the girl
replied, "They will in a minute."
(Received from Heart Prints - Author Unknown)
Sally walked out of the Children's Hospital for the last time after
spending most of the last 6 months there. She sat the bag with
Jimmy's things in it on the seat beside of her in the car. The drive
home was hard and it was even harder to go into an empty house. She
took the bag to Jimmy's room and started placing the model cars and
things back exactly where he always kept them. She laid down across
his bed and cried herself to sleep holding his pillow. Sally woke up
about midnight and laying beside her on the bed, was a letter folded
up. She opened the letter, it said:
I know your going to miss me, but don't think that I will ever forget
you or stop loving you because I'm not around. I'll think of you
every day Mom and I'll love you even more each day. Someday we will
see each other again. If you want to adopt a little boy so you won't
be so lonely, he can have my room and my old stuff to play with. If
you decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn't like the same
things as us boys do, so you will have to buy her dolls and stuff
Don't be sad when you think about me, this is really a great place.
Grandma and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around
some, but it will take a long time to see everything here. The angels
are so friendly, I love to watch them fly. Jesus doesn't look like
any of the pictures I saw of Him, but I knew it was Him as soon as I
saw Him. Jesus took me to see GOD! And guess what Mom? I got to sit
on GOD'S knee and talk to Him like I was somebody important.
I told GOD that I wanted to write you a letter and tell you Good-bye
and everything, but I knew that wasn't allowed. God handed me some
paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter with. I think
Gabriel is the name of the angel that is going to drop this letter
off to you. God said for me to give you the answer to one of the
questions you asked Him about "Where was He when I needed him?" God
said, "The same place He was when Jesus was on the cross and needed
Him. He was right there, as He always is with all His children."
Oh, by the way Mom, nobody else can see what is written on this paper
but you. To everyone else, it looks like a blank piece of paper. I
have to give God His pen back now, he has some more names to write in
the Book of Life. Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for
Supper. I'm sure the food will be great.
I almost forgot to let you know - Now I don't hurt anymore, the
cancer is all gone. I'm glad because I couldn't stand that pain
anymore and God couldn't stand to see me suffer the pain either, so
He sent The Angel of Mercy to get me. The Angel said I was Special
God & Jesus & Me".
DON'T WAKE HIM UP
(Received from Horace S. Hooper - Author Unknown)
A man was giving his testimony at one of those old Salvation Army
open air street meetings. As he was testifying, a heckler yelled
out, "Why don't you shut up and sit down? You're just dreaming."
Immediately that heckler felt a tug on his coat. He looked down to
see a little girl, who said. "Sir, may I speak to you? That man who
is talking up there is my daddy. Daddy used to be a drunkard. He
used to spend all of the money he made on whiskey. My mother was very
sad and would cry most of the time. Sometimes when my daddy came
home, he would hit my mother. I didn't have shoes or a nice dress to
wear to school. But look at my shoes. And see this pretty dress? My
daddy bought these for me. And see my mother over there? She's the
one with the bright smile on her face. She's happy now. She sings
even when she's doing the ironing." Then the little girl
said . . . "Mister, if my daddy is dreaming, please don't wake him
Copyright © 1998 - 2009 by Stephen J. Hall - Weekly letters of
encouragement to Christians written by Stephen J. Hall unless
otherwise indicated. Notes from the Valley and Humor from the Valley
are meant to brighten your day and encourage you along the way. If
you are blessed by them, please feel free to make copies and pass
them along to others. If you have something you'd like to contribute
to a future edition, or any questions or comments, please contact us
"Surely God does not reject a blameless man or strengthen the hands
of evildoers. He will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your
lips with shouts of joy." Job 8:20-21 (NIV)