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In the beginning,

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  • myqel1960@aol.com
    In the beginning, God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, with green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would
    Message 1 of 1 , Jan 16, 2005
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      In the beginning, God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and
      spinach, with green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman
      would live long and healthy lives.

      Then, using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and
      Krispy Kreme. And Satan said: "You want hot fudge with that?" And Man said:
      "Yes!" And Woman said: "I'll have one, too . . with sprinkles." And lo they
      gained 10 pounds.

      And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that
      Man found so fair.

      And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane,
      and combined them. And Woman went from size 2 to size 14.

      So God said: "Try my fresh green garden salad." And Satan presented crumbled
      Bleu Cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman
      unfastened their belts following the repast.

      God then said: "I have sent you heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil
      in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep-fried coconut
      shrimp, butter-dipped lobster chunks, and chicken-fried steak so big it
      needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol went through the roof.

      Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming
      with potassium and good nutrition. Then Satan peeled off the healthful
      skin, sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them in
      animal fats adding copious quantities of salt. And Man packed on more pounds.

      God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose
      those extra pounds. And Satan introduced cable TV with remote control so Man
      would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and
      cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretchy lycra jogging
      suits.

      God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and
      still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and the
      99-cent double cheeseburger. Then Satan said: "You want fries with that?" And
      Man replied: "Yes! And super size 'em!" And Satan said: " It is good."

      And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.

      God sighed . . then created quadruple by-pass surgery.
       
      Satan chuckled and created HMO's.




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