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Fwd: 'Virgin' Mary Loses Custody.

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  • Freya
    Message 1 of 1 , Jan 1, 2008
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      >'Virgin' Mary Loses Custody of Baby Jesus. Jerusalem Morals Court
      >Sends Week-old Boy to Egyptian Foster Home. Illiterate 15-year-
      >old 'Virgin' Mother Unfit Parent, Rabbis Rule. Mary Ordered to
      >Cleave to Carpenter Husband Joseph, Have Legit Kids, Hope for Jesus's
      >Return at Puberty.
      >
      >Jerusalem, Jan. 2nd.--A verdict in 'The People vs. Mary' case was
      >handed down in Morals Court yesterday, placing week-old baby Jesus in
      >custody of an Egyptian astrologer and his wife who are licensed
      >foster parents.
      >
      >The couple, who have as many as fifty foster children of all
      >ethnicities in care at their expansive Nile plantation at any one
      >time, will school the Hebrew boy in many ancient sciences, including
      >COBOL, that his parents of record, the so-called 'Virgin Mary' and
      >her sleepover the Living Breath of the Holy Spirit, cannot provide.
      >
      >The Living Breath of the Holy Spirit itself has historically
      >abandoned its young female companions to their fates, with the recent
      >Bethlehem incident no exception to this distressing practice.
      >
      >Nationwide, Jewish moms who might not have been particularly
      >protective of their nubile daughters recently formed the group 'Moms
      >Against Spirit Inception' and began distributing literature to girls
      >over ten years of age urging that they 'Just say No!' to G-d.
      >
      >Results of that campaign have been gratifying, with the troubling
      >exception of the illiterate shepherd girl Mary, who only a week ago
      >stated that her manger-born son Jesus was the result of her sleepily
      >yielding to pleas from the Living Breath of the Holy Spirit to become
      >the earthly vessel of a 'Saviour' of mankind.
      >
      >'If I knew then what I know now,' said Mary following yesterday's
      >court order, 'I would Just say No! to any bedside Holy Spirit and
      >call on my father to beat the crap out the intruder.'
      >
      >In the opinion of many longtime Jewish Moms, a valuable lesson
      >learned, too late.
      >
      >Mary's week-old son Jesus appeared happy with the court's order, but
      >offered no comment other that a bubbly 'Skwurrchhh' when his feet
      >were tickled.
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