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RE: [Exex-gay] Grumpy Old Gays

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  • gbmaninuk@yahoo.com
    I am gay in my 40 s and not grumpy or bitter about being gay except the fact that I regret not coming out a lot sooner in my life. I am concerned, afraid
    Message 1 of 13 , Oct 1, 2005
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      I am gay in my 40's and not grumpy or bitter about being gay except the fact that I regret not coming out a lot sooner in my life.       I am concerned, afraid and sometimes confused about how to complete my coming out process and also concerend and worried about my partners struggles with his coming out process but i  am not sad and bitter..
       
       
      Perhaps if society and the church stop making it such a struggle Gay men and women  would not have the anguish to deal durring the coming out process..     
       
       
       
       


      Legal Alien <legalAlienInDC@...> wrote:

      This is a little unfair I think - who says the young guys have the monopoly on being upbeat and positive?  Whos to say the young guys arent all bitter and twisted too?  By the nature of things, people that seek these groups out will be people in need and hopefully benefit and move on.  The danger of course is that the group just becomes an excuse for constant venting and feeling sorry for yourself.

      Anyhow, I'm going to be 40 this year and looking forward at some point in the future to my first gay relationship since accepting my sexuality - thats positive I think :).

      On a different note, I didnt say anything when Anthony asked about the news, but I'm beginning to feel overwhelmed by the amount thats posted.  I do delete it, but it seems that every day there are at least two lenghty news items.  Just my personal opinion.

      On another different note, I love Australia too.  I screwed up my chance to be a resident there, but would love another opportunity.  Pray for me or find me a decent aussie bloke :).

      Cheers,

      Alan the pom....or the limey depending on your perspective :)



      ========================================
      Message Received: Oct 01 2005, 03:25 AM
      From: "Andrew" <acj1968@...>
      To: Exex-gay@yahoogroups.com
      Cc:
      Subject: [Exex-gay] Grumpy Old Gays

      <html><body>


      <tt>
      Being a fringe dweller in the group I'm wondering if there are any <BR>
      members between 18 and 35.<BR>
      <BR>
      An observation - it appears many gays (especially the guys)are <BR>
      carrying a shit load of baggage and have done so for way too many <BR>
      years.<BR>
      <BR>
      There are also a few older gay guys that post and still can't get on <BR>
      with their lives.<BR>
      <BR>
      Is it true that gay men can look forward to growing old, alone, <BR>
      bitter, grumpy and pathetic? Does anyone buy this lie still?<BR>
      <BR>
      I would have thought that at some point you have to grow up <BR>
      emotionally and let go allowing one self to thrive.<BR>
      <BR>
      It would be great to see some posts from a few younger members and <BR>
      get their thinking out in the open.<BR>
      <BR>
      On a good note - Australia remains one of the greatest and most <BR>
      beautiful nations on the planet :-)<BR>
      <BR>
      AJ<BR>
      <BR>
      <BR>
      <BR>
      </tt>


          
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    • edwardxderwent
      to appreciate the point of these verses - you really need to read all to see the contrast between what australians once called home (england) and the emerging
      Message 2 of 13 , Oct 1, 2005
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        to appreciate the point of these verses - you really need to read
        all to see the contrast between what australians once called home
        (england) and the emerging idea of an australian'identity'....

        and, a footnote on meckellar ****


        MY COUNTRY

        The love of field and coppice,
        Of green and shaded lanes,
        Of ordered woods and gardens
        Is running in your veins;
        Strong love of grey-blue distance
        Brown streams and soft dim skies -
        I know but cannot share it,
        My love is otherwise.

        I love a sunburnt country,
        A land of sweeping plains,
        Of rugged mountain ranges,
        Of droughts and flooding rains.
        I love her far horizons,
        I love her jewel-sea,
        Her beauty and her terror-
        This wide brown land for me.

        The stark white ring-barked forests,
        All tragic to the moon,
        The saphire misted mountains,
        The hot gold hush of noon,
        Green tangle of the brushes
        Where lithe lianas coil,
        And orchids deck the tree-tops,
        And ferns the warm dark soil.

        Core of my heart, my country!
        Her pitiless blue sky,
        When sick at heart around us
        We watch the cattle die -
        But then the grey clouds gather,
        And we can bless again
        The drumming of an army,
        The steady soaking rain.

        Core of my heart, my country!
        Land of the rainbow gold,
        For flood and fire and famine
        She pays us back threefold.
        Over the thirsty paddocks
        Watch, after many days,
        The filmy veil of greenness
        That thickens as we gaze

        An opal hearted country,
        A wilful, lavish land-
        All you who have not loved her,
        You will not understand -
        Though earth holds many splendours,
        Wherever I may die,
        I know to what brown country
        My homing thoughts will fly.

        ----------------------------------------------------

        ***DOROTHY MACKELLAR

        Dorothy Mackellar was born in Sydney, NSW into a prosperous and
        notable family. She received a private education before attending
        Sydney university. After her studies Mackellar travelled widely in
        Australia and abroad. 'My Country', which she wrote at the age of
        nineteen, was published in 1908, It appeared in the London Spectator
        entitled 'Core of My Heart'. The poem was revised for her first book
        of poetry The Closed Door (1911). Although she has written three
        other works of poetry and three novels, The Little Blue Devil (1914)
        and Two's Company (1914) in collaboration with Ruth Bedford and
        Outlaw's Luck (1913) as sole author, it is 'My Country' that springs
        to the mind of most Australians when Dorothea Mackellar's name is
        mentioned. She ceased to write in the 1920's due to constant ill-
        health but was patron, and involved the organisation, of the English
        Association for several years. Mackellar passed away in 1968 and was
        the recipient of an OBE in 1968 for her service to the
        Commonwealth.
      • Yowee The Jew
        Thank you for that, I loved it. ... Spectator ... book ... (1914) ... springs ... English ... was
        Message 3 of 13 , Oct 1, 2005
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          Thank you for that, I loved it.

          --- In Exex-gay@yahoogroups.com, "edwardxderwent"
          <edwardxderwent@y...> wrote:
          >
          >
          > to appreciate the point of these verses - you really need to read
          > all to see the contrast between what australians once called home
          > (england) and the emerging idea of an australian'identity'....
          >
          > and, a footnote on meckellar ****
          >
          >
          > MY COUNTRY
          >
          > The love of field and coppice,
          > Of green and shaded lanes,
          > Of ordered woods and gardens
          > Is running in your veins;
          > Strong love of grey-blue distance
          > Brown streams and soft dim skies -
          > I know but cannot share it,
          > My love is otherwise.
          >
          > I love a sunburnt country,
          > A land of sweeping plains,
          > Of rugged mountain ranges,
          > Of droughts and flooding rains.
          > I love her far horizons,
          > I love her jewel-sea,
          > Her beauty and her terror-
          > This wide brown land for me.
          >
          > The stark white ring-barked forests,
          > All tragic to the moon,
          > The saphire misted mountains,
          > The hot gold hush of noon,
          > Green tangle of the brushes
          > Where lithe lianas coil,
          > And orchids deck the tree-tops,
          > And ferns the warm dark soil.
          >
          > Core of my heart, my country!
          > Her pitiless blue sky,
          > When sick at heart around us
          > We watch the cattle die -
          > But then the grey clouds gather,
          > And we can bless again
          > The drumming of an army,
          > The steady soaking rain.
          >
          > Core of my heart, my country!
          > Land of the rainbow gold,
          > For flood and fire and famine
          > She pays us back threefold.
          > Over the thirsty paddocks
          > Watch, after many days,
          > The filmy veil of greenness
          > That thickens as we gaze
          >
          > An opal hearted country,
          > A wilful, lavish land-
          > All you who have not loved her,
          > You will not understand -
          > Though earth holds many splendours,
          > Wherever I may die,
          > I know to what brown country
          > My homing thoughts will fly.
          >
          > ----------------------------------------------------
          >
          > ***DOROTHY MACKELLAR
          >
          > Dorothy Mackellar was born in Sydney, NSW into a prosperous and
          > notable family. She received a private education before attending
          > Sydney university. After her studies Mackellar travelled widely in
          > Australia and abroad. 'My Country', which she wrote at the age of
          > nineteen, was published in 1908, It appeared in the London
          Spectator
          > entitled 'Core of My Heart'. The poem was revised for her first
          book
          > of poetry The Closed Door (1911). Although she has written three
          > other works of poetry and three novels, The Little Blue Devil
          (1914)
          > and Two's Company (1914) in collaboration with Ruth Bedford and
          > Outlaw's Luck (1913) as sole author, it is 'My Country' that
          springs
          > to the mind of most Australians when Dorothea Mackellar's name is
          > mentioned. She ceased to write in the 1920's due to constant ill-
          > health but was patron, and involved the organisation, of the
          English
          > Association for several years. Mackellar passed away in 1968 and
          was
          > the recipient of an OBE in 1968 for her service to the
          > Commonwealth.
        • edwardxderwent
          ... Thank you for that, I loved it. thnx for saying so yowee - i can t read some lines without a lump in my throat.. i beg everyones indulgence (especially my
          Message 4 of 13 , Oct 1, 2005
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            --- In Exex-gay@yahoogroups.com, "Yowee The Jew" <hivyo@y...> wrote:

            Thank you for that, I loved it.

            thnx for saying so yowee - i can't read some lines without a lump in
            my throat..

            i beg everyones indulgence (especially my canadian mate in taiwan,
            with whom i share so much) and say something more..


            in so many simple words mackellar caught the feelings of europeans
            living in this land - i explained it that way, as the experience of
            the original inhabitants, who have been treated so shabbily by white
            aussies, may be altogether different...


            ---------------------------------------------------------



            > --- In Exex-gay@yahoogroups.com, "edwardxderwent"
            > <edwardxderwent@y...> wrote:
            > >
            > >
            > > to appreciate the point of these verses - you really need to
            read
            > > all to see the contrast between what australians once called
            home
            > > (england) and the emerging idea of an australian'identity'....
            > >
            > > and, a footnote on meckellar ****
            > >
            > >
            > > MY COUNTRY
            > >
            > > The love of field and coppice,
            > > Of green and shaded lanes,
            > > Of ordered woods and gardens
            > > Is running in your veins;
            > > Strong love of grey-blue distance
            > > Brown streams and soft dim skies -
            > > I know but cannot share it,
            > > My love is otherwise.
            > >
            > > I love a sunburnt country,
            > > A land of sweeping plains,
            > > Of rugged mountain ranges,
            > > Of droughts and flooding rains.
            > > I love her far horizons,
            > > I love her jewel-sea,
            > > Her beauty and her terror-
            > > This wide brown land for me.
            > >
            > > The stark white ring-barked forests,
            > > All tragic to the moon,
            > > The saphire misted mountains,
            > > The hot gold hush of noon,
            > > Green tangle of the brushes
            > > Where lithe lianas coil,
            > > And orchids deck the tree-tops,
            > > And ferns the warm dark soil.
            > >
            > > Core of my heart, my country!
            > > Her pitiless blue sky,
            > > When sick at heart around us
            > > We watch the cattle die -
            > > But then the grey clouds gather,
            > > And we can bless again
            > > The drumming of an army,
            > > The steady soaking rain.
            > >
            > > Core of my heart, my country!
            > > Land of the rainbow gold,
            > > For flood and fire and famine
            > > She pays us back threefold.
            > > Over the thirsty paddocks
            > > Watch, after many days,
            > > The filmy veil of greenness
            > > That thickens as we gaze
            > >
            > > An opal hearted country,
            > > A wilful, lavish land-
            > > All you who have not loved her,
            > > You will not understand -
            > > Though earth holds many splendours,
            > > Wherever I may die,
            > > I know to what brown country
            > > My homing thoughts will fly.
            > >
            > > ----------------------------------------------------
            > >
            > > ***DOROTHY MACKELLAR
            > >
            > > Dorothy Mackellar was born in Sydney, NSW into a prosperous and
            > > notable family. She received a private education before
            attending
            > > Sydney university. After her studies Mackellar travelled widely
            in
            > > Australia and abroad. 'My Country', which she wrote at the age
            of
            > > nineteen, was published in 1908, It appeared in the London
            > Spectator
            > > entitled 'Core of My Heart'. The poem was revised for her first
            > book
            > > of poetry The Closed Door (1911). Although she has written three
            > > other works of poetry and three novels, The Little Blue Devil
            > (1914)
            > > and Two's Company (1914) in collaboration with Ruth Bedford and
            > > Outlaw's Luck (1913) as sole author, it is 'My Country' that
            > springs
            > > to the mind of most Australians when Dorothea Mackellar's name
            is
            > > mentioned. She ceased to write in the 1920's due to constant ill-
            > > health but was patron, and involved the organisation, of the
            > English
            > > Association for several years. Mackellar passed away in 1968 and
            > was
            > > the recipient of an OBE in 1968 for her service to the
            > > Commonwealth.
          • edwardxderwent
            kendall was earlier than mackellar - born at milton on the south coast of nsw about 1830... but you can see the emerging aussie identity in some of his
            Message 5 of 13 , Oct 1, 2005
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              kendall was earlier than mackellar - born at milton on the south
              coast of nsw about 1830... but you can see the emerging aussie
              identity in some of his writings also ...

              i believe these verses were written near gosford - just north of
              sydney, where beautiful mountain gullies run down to a sea-side
              plain..

              stop your car at the side of the road and you will hear the typical
              tink ... tink.. the bell like call of the bellbirds.. (who are not
              a particularly nice bird - who drive out other birds from an area
              they colonise ... )



              By channels of coolness the echoes are calling,
              And down the dim gorges I hear the creek falling;
              It lives in the mountains, where moss and the sedges
              Touch with their beauty the banks and the ledges;
              Through brakes of the cedar and sycamore bowers
              Struggles the light that is love to the flowers.
              And, softer than slumber, and sweeter than singing,
              The notes of the bellbirds are running and ringing.

              The silver-voiced bellbirds, the darlings of daytime,
              They sing in September their songs of the Maytime
              When shadows wax strong, and the thunderbolts hurtle,
              They hide with their fear in the leaves of the myrtle:
              When rain and the sunbeams shine mingled together
              They start up like fairies that follow fair fair weather,
              And straightway the hues of their feathers unfolden
              Are the green and the purple, the blue and the golden.

              October, the maiden of bright yellow tresses,
              Loiters for love in these cool wildernesses;
              Loiters knee-deep in the grasses to listen,
              Where dripping rocks gleam and the and the leafy pools glisten
              Then is the time when the water-moons splendid
              Break with their gold, and are scattered or blended
              Over the creeks, till the woodlands have warning
              Of songs of the bellbird and wings of the morning.

              Welcome as waters unkissed by the summers
              Are the voices of Bellbirds to thirsty far-comers
              When fiery December sets foot in the forest,
              And the need of the wayfarer presses the sorest,
              Pent in the ridges for ever and ever,
              The bellbirds direct him to spring to the river,
              With rings and with ripple, like runnels whose torrents
              Are toned by the pebbles and leaves in the current.

              Often I sit, looking back to a childhood
              Mixd with the sights and the sounds of the wildwood,
              Longing for power and the sweetness to fashion
              Lyrics with beats like the heartbeats of passion -
              Songs interwoven of lights and of laughters
              Borrowed from bellbirds in far forest rafters;
              So I might keep in the cities and alleys
              The beauty and strength of the deep mountain valleys,
              Charming to slumber the pain of my losses
              With glimpses of creeks and a vision of mosses.
            • William Zelensky
              Tank you for this reminder of why I love Australia. Even though I am now living in Canada I still love Australia my second home. I wish one could change
              Message 6 of 13 , Oct 5, 2005
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                Tank you for this reminder of why I love Australia. Even though I am now living in Canada I still love Australia my second home. I wish one could change countries easier.
                 
                William

                edwardxderwent <edwardxderwent@...> wrote:


                to appreciate the point of these  verses - you really need to read
                all to see the contrast between what australians once called home
                (england) and the emerging idea of an australian'identity'....

                and, a footnote on meckellar ****


                MY COUNTRY

                The love of field and coppice,
                Of green and shaded lanes,
                Of ordered woods and gardens
                Is running in your veins;
                Strong love of grey-blue distance
                Brown streams and soft dim skies -
                I know but cannot share it,
                My love is otherwise.

                I love a sunburnt country,
                A land of sweeping plains,
                Of rugged mountain ranges,
                Of droughts and flooding rains.
                I love her far horizons,
                I love her jewel-sea,
                Her beauty and her terror-
                This wide brown land for me.

                The stark white ring-barked forests,
                All tragic to the moon,
                The saphire misted mountains,
                The hot gold hush of noon,
                Green tangle of the brushes
                Where lithe lianas coil,
                And orchids deck the tree-tops,
                And ferns the warm dark soil.

                Core of my heart, my country!
                Her pitiless blue sky,
                When sick at heart around us
                We watch the cattle die -
                But then the grey clouds gather,
                And we can bless again
                The drumming of an army,
                The steady soaking rain.

                Core of my heart, my country!
                Land of the rainbow gold,
                For flood and fire and famine
                She pays us back threefold.
                Over the thirsty paddocks
                Watch, after many days,
                The filmy veil of greenness
                That thickens as we gaze

                An opal hearted country,
                A wilful, lavish land-
                All you who have not loved her,
                You will not understand -
                Though earth holds many splendours,
                Wherever I may die,
                I know to what brown country
                My homing thoughts will fly.

                ----------------------------------------------------

                ***DOROTHY MACKELLAR

                Dorothy Mackellar was born in Sydney, NSW into a prosperous and
                notable family. She received a private education before attending
                Sydney university. After her studies Mackellar travelled widely in
                Australia and abroad. 'My Country', which she wrote at the age of
                nineteen, was published in 1908, It appeared in the London Spectator
                entitled 'Core of My Heart'. The poem was revised for her first book
                of poetry The Closed Door (1911). Although she has written three
                other works of poetry and three novels, The Little Blue Devil (1914)
                and Two's Company (1914) in collaboration with Ruth Bedford and
                Outlaw's Luck (1913) as sole author, it is 'My Country' that springs
                to the mind of most Australians when Dorothea Mackellar's name is
                mentioned. She ceased to write in the 1920's due to constant ill-
                health but was patron, and involved the organisation, of the English
                Association for several years. Mackellar passed away in 1968 and was
                the recipient of an OBE in 1968 for her service to the
                Commonwealth. 








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              • edwardxderwent
                ... wrote: Tank you for this reminder of why I love Australia. Even though I am now living in Canada I still love Australia my second home. I wish one could
                Message 7 of 13 , Oct 6, 2005
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                  --- In Exex-gay@yahoogroups.com, William Zelensky totallyseeking@y...>
                  wrote:

                  Tank you for this reminder of why I love Australia. Even though I am
                  now living in Canada I still love Australia my second home. I wish one
                  could change countries easier.


                  may i ask william if you have fully investigated the immigration
                  options open to you.. ??

                  this site may help you:

                  http://www.glitf.org.au/

                  glitf helps aussies bring their GLBT partners to australia, but there
                  is a lot of info available as some use independent migration as an
                  option.

                  there is also a link to the immigration departments web site.

                  hop you can win !!


                  hugs


                  kenni
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