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5206Re: exit interviews

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  • mishmisha9
    Feb 17, 2010
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      I don't see any need for any of us to be attacking one another.
      This site is for discussing the cult eckankar . . . insults directed at
      members of ESA are distracting readers from the purposeful discussions
      and intent of the forum. It creates an unfriendly atmosphere and can
      discourage others from posting. Can we stop this fuss, please!

      I've read the posts . . . I don't need re-directed to any of them
      to re-emphasize or rehash your complaints. Let's move on.

      Mish

      --- In EckankarSurvivorsAnonymous@yahoogroups.com, "Zoey" <zzoey75@...> wrote:
      >
      > Postecon, If you will please direct me to the Operating Manual, the one which dictates what an ex-eckist sounds like, I will be glad to read it. Apparantly, there is some manual with which I am unaware. Talk about your cult behavior.
      >
      > Johnathan half read my email, then jumped my case about how I should leave eckankar. But, Dear, I left eckankar many moons ago. Furthermore, Johnathan made assumptions about my friend, which are ridiculous and out-of-line. He is, definitely not, psychic.
      >
      > The only question I posed was this: Has anyone ever heard of eckankar doing "exit interviews"?
      >
      > My friend did as I did; she left eckankar under her own steam, in her own style. And if you and johnathan can't handle the fact that you were not consulted on the matter - oh well. Life sure does suck when people do their own thinking, doesn't it?
      >
      > Now get off it. This has gone on too long as it is.
      >
      > zoey
      >
      > --- In EckankarSurvivorsAnonymous@yahoogroups.com, "postekcon" <postekcon@> wrote:
      > >
      > > Zoey, you sound like an ekultist is disguise here?
      > > Why ask questions or raise issues on ESA forum, then start shouting down response because you don't like pertinent answers?
      > > -Postekcon
      > >
      > >
      > > --- In EckankarSurvivorsAnonymous@yahoogroups.com, "Zoey" <zzoey75@> wrote:
      > > >
      > > > Did your tenure in eckankar teach you nothing, johnathan? Must each of us consult your protocol book prior to leaving the cult?
      > > >
      > > > My friend chose not to do a 'disappearing act'. She chose to tell her eck clergy of choice her reasons for leaving. She had her reasons for choosing this particular ESA; namely, they were on friendly terms, and, she feels, he will tell the others.
      > > >
      > > > How do you presume to know her motives? Who are you to dictate how she handles her departure? Please.
      > > >
      > > > At any rate, my initial post invited comments concerning "exit interviews", which I have not heard of.
      > > >
      > > > zoey
      > > >
      > > > --- In EckankarSurvivorsAnonymous@yahoogroups.com, "jonathanjohns96" <jonathanjohns96@> wrote:
      > > > >
      > > > > Zoey,
      > > > >
      > > > > I'm really confused by your initial post. First you say
      > > > >
      > > > > "A friend called me today to tell me that she had quit Eckankar."
      > > > >
      > > > > Then you say
      > > > >
      > > > > "She phoned an ESA that she was comfortable with, and briefly said that it wasn't for her any more."
      > > > >
      > > > > I then stated that if your friend quit she should not be contacting Eckists to get some kind of approval from them. Where do I get the idea that she wanted approval? You specifically stated "She phoned an ESA she felt COMFORTABLE with." (my emphasis). So once again, if she quit, why is she contacting Eckankar at all? She should be getting on with her own life. And second question "Why is she specifically contacting an ESA that she feels COMFORTABLE with?" I don't get it. It sounds to me like she really hasn't quit Eckankar at all.
      > > > >
      > > > > You also said:
      > > > >
      > > > > "She quit in the manner that was most reasonable for her. She WANTED the local group, as well as the Corp, to know her reasons for leaving - and knew this loud-mouthed ESA would be the best megaphone she could find. The ESA's approbation never entered the issue."
      > > > >
      > > > > Why would she even care what Eckankar thinks? Tell her to grow up. Or tell her to join a message board and speak out. She's clueless if she thinks that Eckankar really cares why she left. Not only that, it is none of their business if she already left.
      > > > >
      > > > > Also, you change your story again from your first post to your second post. In your first post, you say that in talking to the ESA "she briefly said that it [Eckankar] wasn't for her any more [sic]." Then in your second post you say that she "knew this loud-mouthed ESA would be the best megaphone she could find." It seems like you changed your story because first you say that she told the ESA next to nothing, then you say that she wanted a loud-mouthed megaphone. "Why would she want a loud-mouthed megaphone if she told her next to nothing about why she left Eckankar? Again, the fact that she is telling her reasons (sob story) to a loud-mouthed megaphone Eckist is telling me that she wants attention or pity from Eckankar because she feels that they wronged her. Seeking attention from the entity that abused you is giving all of your power to them. Tell her that she is giving all of her power to Eckankar. She needs to consolidate her power within herself. And the best way to do that is simply to ignore Eckankar.
      > > > >
      > > > > And, Zoey, maybe if you would make a post containing more than three sentences, and explain exactly what happened, I would have a much easier time figuring out what you are talking about. And I would have an easier time making a sensible comment. And I wouldn't have to use my "psychic powers" to figure out what you are talking about.
      > > > >
      > > > > So now I am going to address everyone except you Zoey. If you are presently a member of Eckabkar, and are contemplating leaving Eckankar, just leave. Don't agree to any "exit interview" because you don't owe Eckankar anything. To give you an analogy, if you are in an abusive relationship and then you quit, then you're done. And its now time to take care of yourself, not be concerned about the other person, i.e., the abuser. If you are the person who can remain friends with people who you knew in Eckankar, then go ahead and do that. Otherwise, just move on.
      > > > >
      > > > > Jonathan
      > > > >
      > > > >
      > > > > --- In EckankarSurvivorsAnonymous@yahoogroups.com, "Zoey" <zzoey75@> wrote:
      > > > > >
      > > > > > Thanks for this input, jonathan. Not knowing you, I will assume that you mean well. I will also assume that you have experience which dictates your views. This may be of some assistance to someone who is, currently, planning to leave eckankar.
      > > > > >
      > > > > > However, it can serve me very little, considering the fact that I left eckankar long ago. And it can hardly serve my friend, considering the fact that she already quit, as I mentioned.
      > > > > >
      > > > > > She quit in the manner that was most reasonable for her. She WANTED the local group, as well as the Corp, to know her reasons for leaving - and knew this loud-mouthed ESA would be the best megaphone she could find. The ESA's approbation never entered the issue.
      > > > > >
      > > > > > Keep your day job, jonathan. You'll never make a living as a psychic.
      > > > > >
      > > > > > zoey
      > > > > >
      > > > > >
      > > > > >
      > > > > > --- In EckankarSurvivorsAnonymous@yahoogroups.com, "jonathanjohns96" <jonathanjohns96@> wrote:
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > > Zoey,
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > > First of all, phoning an ESA to inform them that you want to quit is a very bad idea because all you are doing is giving them an opening to convince you that you shouldn't quit. Also, it almost sounds to me that she wants the ESA to support her decision. If a person is truly quitting Eckankar, you don't worry about what anyone in Eckankar thinks. It's your decision; it's your life. This may sound cold-hearted to some people, but it is the only way to deal with an organization which has been controlling your thinking, and indeed your whole life. It's your life now, and you can't allow Eckankar to continue running it.
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > > If a person wants to quit Eckankar, they should send a letter to the main office informing them of that, they will send you a letter back which asks you to sign a form verifying that you really want to quit. You sign that form, then send it back. Then Eckankar will send you a verification letter. Then contact the person running the Eck center to inform them that you have resigned from Eckankar. The preferred order is mail, email, then phone.
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > > If you are an initiator, ESA, or have keys to the Eck center, that naturally complicates things.
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > > I would not agree to an exit interview. It seems to me that it is just a guise for them to use subtle mind control techniques to convince you to not resign from Eckankar.
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > > Jonathan
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > >
      > > > > > > --- In EckankarSurvivorsAnonymous@yahoogroups.com, "Zoey" <zzoey75@> wrote:
      > > > > > > >
      > > > > > > > A friend called me today to tell me that she had quit eckankar. She phoned an ESA that she was comfortable with, and briefly said that it wasn't for her any more.
      > > > > > > >
      > > > > > > > An hour later the RESA phoned her, and said he wanted to schedule an "exit interview". She thinks that is pretty common now.
      > > > > > > >
      > > > > > > > I never heard of it.
      > > > > > > >
      > > > > > > > zoey
      > > > > > > >
      > > > > > >
      > > > > >
      > > > >
      > > >
      > >
      >
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