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C2CN Newsletter--Art of Making Offers That Get Accepted

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  • John Agno
    Here is your Coach to Coach Network (C2CN) Newsletter: Coaching Connections Open Doors Blinded by Perception Letter to the Editor Sponsor Announcement The Art
    Message 1 of 1 , Apr 3, 2003
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      Here is your Coach to Coach Network (C2CN) Newsletter:
      Coaching Connections
      Open Doors
      Blinded by Perception
      Letter to the Editor
      Sponsor Announcement
      The Art of Making Offers That Get Accepted
      Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) Frequencies
      A Stamp Collector

      This infomediary newsletter is brought to you by the HRD Press/Training House ( www.TrainingHouse.com), Institute for Life Coach Training (www.LifeCoachTraining.com), Human Synergistics International (www.HumanSyn.com), B-Coach Systems, LLC (www.B-Coach.com) and Coaching Matters (www.CoachingMatters.com). If you enjoy and learn from this newsletter's content, please let these sponsors know that you appreciate their contribution to your success. To subscribe, go to www.Coach2Coach.info

      Coaching Connections
      April 14th

      ICF Virtual Community, Region 1 presents: “Loving What Is:  Four Questions That Can Change Your Life.”  Byron Katie, visionary and author of the book by the same title, developed this technique after a 10-year spiral of depression and despair.  “The Work” is a powerful new method of self-realization.  Learn about this revolutionary process of inquiry (perfect for coaches), which has many applications.  www.thework.org.  All coaches welcome.  Monday, April 14, 6:30-8:00 pm ET.  No pre-registration.  Just call 646-519-5883, pin 0555#

      April 17th

      ICF Virtual Community Region 2 presents, Executive Coaching with Backbone & Heart 

      Mary Beth O'Neill, Leadership Consultant and Executive Coach
      Mary Beth focuses on encouraging individual initiative and leadership from a systemic
      perspective to achieve clearly defined business results. Her specialty is effectively linking people processes to business outcomes. Join us to learn how she gets breakthrough results with backbone and heart. All coaches welcome.
      Thursday, April 17th, 2003  11:30am-1pm Pacific -- 2:30-4pm Eastern
      Bridge:  646-519-5883   pin 0155 #

      August 22-24

      We invite you to experience the 2003 International Coach Federation Australasia Conference to be held at the Star City Hotel, August 22-24, 2003 in Sydney, Australia. Join us in celebrating our theme "Coaching - Partnering for Success - Building Excellence".

      The theme has been chosen to embrace the vital roles, and the importance of the relationship formed, when coaches partner with their clients. This partnership leads clients to a place of success, understanding and acceptance. Coaching is recognized as a key service that will continue to grow and evolve, especially in the light of our ever-changing world.

      This conference is designed to assist coaches on their evolutionary journey.

      The second ICF Australasia Conference promises to be an energetic, inspiring and valuable experience for all. With a programme that will be valuable to new and established coaches alike, the stage has been set for all to come together in the spirit of learning, sharing and growing.

      We will be announcing very soon, our special early bird rates, so don't miss out on the latest information. Let us keep you up to date with all the conference activity, speakers and the commencement of online registration by completing the form at

      Lexie Palmer, Conference Manager,  icfa@...

      Open Doors
      Dr. Bob Rausch, DrBob@... , business coach and
      stress is the culprit of business:

      The worse kind of stress comes from situations and people
      we can do nothing about.  I have found that those people who
      experience the greatest amount of stress are those who
      know a better way of getting things done, but just can't
      seem to get people to move in that direction. I also
      believe that those who have the potential for the greatest
      amount of stress are, who I call, the "120 per centers."
      Everything they do they give all they have.  The difficulty
      comes when we believe everyone else "should" do the
      same. This past week I listened to one of these "120
      per centers" express his anger and I thought it was a
      super example for us all.

      Mel is a "120%" person and exceptional at his job. He told
      me he left work one day feeling completely frustrated and
      that he had enough. As he pulled into his driveway he
      pushed his remote to open the garage door - it didn't
      budge - he pushed it again, and it still didn't open. He
      said in that moment he thought he would back up his
      truck, hit the accelerator, and just ram it right though the
      garage door. I think we would all agree that Mel was at
      the end of his "stress rope." Out of his experience came
      a very good lesson for us all - "When the door doesn't open,
      crashing through it is not an option!"

      Energy Performance Tip:

      Here's something I learned from one of my mentors - "Do all
      you can and leave the rest to God."  We lose a lot of energy
      if we concern ourselves with those who don't see or understand
      the direction we are taking.  Accepting that people and situations
      will seem, at times, to be a barrier to our success is important.
      Giving energy to those people or those situations is a waste of
      time and energy.  Some doors just won't open. Ramming
      them may create something we will regret.  Pick your
      target, make it clear and concise, and drive your energy
      toward that. Crashing the door is a worthless target.  It
      becomes an "energy diversion" and, if you're not careful,
      you will be crashing doors all day long, everyday.  Those
      doors will present themselves as people or situations.  The
      question to ask: "Is this something that's going to help me
      accomplish my goal or is it a closed door?"

      To discover your own personal stress & well-being levels,
      take an online self assessment by going to:

      Blinded by Perception
      Each of us thinks we know how the world works rather than just perceiving how the world works.

      Ask an East Asian and a Westerner to decide which two--of a panda, a monkey and a banana--go together.  A Japanese man selects the monkey and the banana; A Briton, the panda and the monkey.

      The cognitive differences start with basic sensory perception.  As the monkey-panda example shows, Westerners typically see categories (animals) where Asians typically see relationships (monkeys eat bananas).  Such differences in thinking can trip up business and political relationships.

      "Westerners and Asians literally see different worlds," says Professor Richard E. Nisbett of the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, in his new book, The Geography of Thought: How Asians and Westerners Think Differently...and Why.  "Westerners pay attention to the focal object, while Asians attend more broadly--to the overall surroundings and to the relations between the object and the field."

      Westerners prefer abstract universal principles; East Asians seek rules appropriate to a situation.  Because of their heightened perception of surroundings, East Asians attribute causality less to actors than to context.

      Cognitive differences likely originate in child rearing and social practices, but are far from hard-wired: Asians living in the West and Westerners in Asia often find that their cognitive style goes native. 

      The more cultural diversity and, hence, thinking styles in an organization or community, the likelier it is to see problems clearly and solve them.

      ---The Wall Street Journal, March 28, 2003

      Are you committed to diversity and an awareness of cultural differences?  To test for your perceptions of diversity and cultural awareness, complete a low cost online self assessment at

      Letter to the Editor
      Subject: Re: Blinded by perception

      I agree with general premise, however research indicates (The Blank Slate,
      Pinker) that the debate between nature and nurture is alive and well.

      In fact, or at least what I perceive as facts based on research, there is
      significant hard-wiring of perception, just look at S and N based functions,
      we didn't get those through nurture!<G>

      As we learn more about the brain and the embodied mind, there is more and
      more revealed about our modus operandi and more explanations of what's
      hard-wired and what's not and my view, is just the opposite, that nurture
      has a lot less to do with things than does nature...at least in most cases,
      there are extreme cases to cause both opinions, however when people are
      raised by their genetic family, where genetics appear in nature and
      nurture...nature wins.

      Doesn't mean we can't change, just likely that we won't basically over
      time...and then of course, why should we.

      All the other stuff about meaning is emergent and if affected by nurture and
      therefore we have to look at components of meaning-making and not just the
      emergent meaning to identify perceptive issues

      Just some thoughts

      Mike Jay, coach@... , B-Coach Systems, LLC

      Sponsor Announcement

      Please Spread the Word!...A small intimate conference like they use to be

      The Denver Coaching Symposium 

      The Denver Coaching Symposium is coming this July 31-August 2 to Denver , Colorado . Three intellectually stimulating days will fill your brain with new thoughts and ideas about your Life Coaching career. You’ll network with your peers, learn new concepts and get tips and tricks to build your practice. And even better, you’ll do all of that in scenic Denver . What a great escape from your everyday life. Visit www.coachingsymposium.com to discover all you’ll need to know to set your plans.

      Sponsored by the Institute For Life Coach Training   www.lifecoachtraining.com  Patrick Williams MCC, President

      The Art of Making Offers That Get Accepted
      by Jackie Sloane, MCC, Executive Coach, jackiesloane@...
      A colleague and I once approached an organization we thought we could help. We were invited to present to the board of this group, leaders of the top companies in the industry.  We had never met most of these people.  We were told we had ten minutes.  Ten?  We were used to having an hour or two.  We asked for more time, but our contact held firm.  On the day of the presentation, we stuck to the guidelines, provided detailed handouts and took a couple of questions.  About three hours later, we received a call.  We were hired.

      Mastering the art of making offers that get accepted can have enormous impact on your success as an internal or external coach or consultant ­ as well as your ability to make a difference in more lives.  My firm got this organization¹s attention in our presentation because they were astonished by how well we understood their concerns. As I learned from one of my first coaches, the better you are at positioning yourself as an expert on someone¹s concerns, the closer you are to being seen as having the expertise to address them. Making offers that get accepted is about listening, and asking the questions that elicit vital information. (In the story above, we didn¹t leave this step out; we were just creative in how we did it.) Whether speaking to individuals or decision-makers at large organizations, in my experience, these guidelines will enhance your success:
      … Never make an offer until you are absolutely clear what your client¹s concerns are.  Most people make offers too soon. Have you ever made an offer too soon?  What happens?  People shut down.  They may feel pushed, that you are not listening, or that you are only focused on your agenda.
      … A concern has an emotional element ­ it is a problem or a deeply felt goal of extreme importance to the client. The better you are at eliciting the real concerns of your client, the more you will be seen as someone who can address them.
      … To become absolutely clear what the client¹s concerns are, summarize what you are hearing and confirm. Ask what other concerns the client may have.  (As you know, the real concern may not be revealed initially.)  
      … Ask how important this concern is.  What is the potential cost if this concern is not addressed now?
      … Determine whether the client is interested in your assistance. At each step of this process, seek permission to continue.
      … Clarify success measures.  How will you and the client know success has been achieved?
      … When you are absolutely certain of your client¹s concerns, how the client measures a successful result, clear you can support her with this, and that there is real interest in your support, you are ready to make very specific, compelling offer.
      … When making this offer in writing, specify the concerns, the goals and the measurable outcomes you have agreed upon.

      Making offers in this way can develop an intimacy that is very powerful.   I was fortunate to learn these guidelines early in my coaching career from two exceptional coaches, and have shared this with many others over the years.

      Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) Frequencies
      How common is your Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) type within the  U.S. population?
      For tables on the Estimated Frequencies of the MBTI types in the United States Population, go to:

      A Stamp Collector
      A stamp collector walks into a bar and says to the female bartender, "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life."

      She tells him, "Listen buddy, philately will get you nowhere."

      John G. Agno, Newsletter Editor
      Certified Executive and Business Coach
      mailto:info@...  734.426.2000 
      Visit http://www.CoachedtoSuccess.com for daily insights to personal and business life delivered to your desktop every day of the year.
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