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  • danielle wilson
    Greetings everyone!! I sit here this morning in my usual routine scanning my messages listening to my children debate what cereal is better, I live in southern
    Message 1 of 7 , Aug 1 8:28 AM
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      Greetings everyone!!
       
      I sit here this morning in my usual routine scanning my messages listening to my children debate what cereal is better, I live in southern california and it is overcast (which I love) at the moment. I only belong to a few boards, this is a new thing for me I am not a computer person but I have given it a shot. I have to say I love reading ideas and thoughts of others and how this can invoke our own ideas. Last weekend I visited my grandfather who lives in another state and a very, very small town.  Of course what a shock. There is a deaf child who lives on his street, I thought if that child lived where I live what oppertunities he would have. So watching the locals and seeing their lives I left thinking I can understand how being someone here who thinks outside of the box would have to leave or just become numb. Again, seeing all the things around me how blessed I am all the choices I have, stores, friends, freedoms to really be who I want to be. So I belong to another board more metaphyisics baised and there was a debate while I was gone on buddhism and enlightenment. I also live close to this community of people and work with in the lines. So personally knowing some of these people, this debate was heated and down right nasty, not to mention these are not people who have really and truely studied buddhism. I never get involved with this type of situation, but it must have been my trip and coming home seeing this, so I responded short and to the point. I used my compassion but I also used my mind. My intent came from a healing stand point but I have a difficult time with the directness. I have studied warriorship and I am wondering has anyone else and do they feel the same? Do you find it difficult with compassion and directness. I love the warriorship, I am going through a difficult custody situation my children have been harmed and I have no problem drawing my sword for them but with my peers it seems different. Any thoughts?
       
      Namaste,
      Danielle


      See the all-new, redesigned Yahoo.com. Check it out.
    • nancy lemke
      hi danielle, anger and drawing a sword can come easy if we let it. i am also guilty of it sometimes. i try, my darnest, to stop first and think about what i
      Message 2 of 7 , Aug 1 1:37 PM
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        hi danielle, anger and drawing a sword can come easy if we let it. i
        am also guilty of it sometimes. i try, my darnest, to stop first
        and think about what i am about to do. then i somehow can realize
        that it isn't worth it and it isn't what buddhism is all about. then
        i can retreat and find compassion. i used to be a ready fighter as
        i also have been thru some rough times and still am having physical
        rough times even right now. it is easy to be defensive and not
        compassionate...but worth the effort to be compassionate. namaste,
        nan

        --- In Buddhism_101@yahoogroups.com, danielle wilson
        <hairteazer2002@...> wrote:
        >
        > Greetings everyone!!
        >
        > I sit here this morning in my usual routine scanning my messages
        listening to my children debate what cereal is better, I live in
        southern california and it is overcast (which I love) at the moment.
        I only belong to a few boards, this is a new thing for me I am not a
        computer person but I have given it a shot. I have to say I love
        reading ideas and thoughts of others and how this can invoke our own
        ideas. Last weekend I visited my grandfather who lives in another
        state and a very, very small town. Of course what a shock. There is
        a deaf child who lives on his street, I thought if that child lived
        where I live what oppertunities he would have. So watching the
        locals and seeing their lives I left thinking I can understand how
        being someone here who thinks outside of the box would have to leave
        or just become numb. Again, seeing all the things around me how
        blessed I am all the choices I have, stores, friends, freedoms to
        really be who I want to be. So I belong to another
        > board more metaphyisics baised and there was a debate while I was
        gone on buddhism and enlightenment. I also live close to this
        community of people and work with in the lines. So personally
        knowing some of these people, this debate was heated and down right
        nasty, not to mention these are not people who have really and
        truely studied buddhism. I never get involved with this type of
        situation, but it must have been my trip and coming home seeing
        this, so I responded short and to the point. I used my compassion
        but I also used my mind. My intent came from a healing stand point
        but I have a difficult time with the directness. I have studied
        warriorship and I am wondering has anyone else and do they feel the
        same? Do you find it difficult with compassion and directness. I
        love the warriorship, I am going through a difficult custody
        situation my children have been harmed and I have no problem drawing
        my sword for them but with my peers it seems different. Any thoughts?
        >
        > Namaste,
        > Danielle
        >
        >
        > ---------------------------------
        > See the all-new, redesigned Yahoo.com. Check it out.
        >
      • danielle wilson
        Hey Nancy, What I find interesting is before I would avoid things like this. But now I find I speak my truth and I do feel I ask where is this coming from, is
        Message 3 of 7 , Aug 1 6:27 PM
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          Hey Nancy,
           
          What I find interesting is before I would avoid things like this. But now I find I speak my truth and I do feel I ask where is this coming from, is this right speach, or even any of my bussiness. But I am also speaking of shambahla training a lineage of buddhism. Before I would be terrified to be dealing with what I am dealing with my children, although standing up for them is by far easier. There are times to speak direct and I struggle with that. So I am wondering what is the attachment?

          nancy lemke <richardlemke@...> wrote:

          hi danielle, anger and drawing a sword can come easy if we let it. i
          am also guilty of it sometimes. i try, my darnest, to stop first
          and think about what i am about to do. then i somehow can realize
          that it isn't worth it and it isn't what buddhism is all about. then
          i can retreat and find compassion. i used to be a ready fighter as
          i also have been thru some rough times and still am having physical
          rough times even right now. it is easy to be defensive and not
          compassionate. ..but worth the effort to be compassionate. namaste,
          nan

          --- In Buddhism_101@ yahoogroups. com, danielle wilson
          <hairteazer2002@ ...> wrote:
          >
          > Greetings everyone!!
          >
          > I sit here this morning in my usual routine scanning my messages
          listening to my children debate what cereal is better, I live in
          southern california and it is overcast (which I love) at the moment.
          I only belong to a few boards, this is a new thing for me I am not a
          computer person but I have given it a shot. I have to say I love
          reading ideas and thoughts of others and how this can invoke our own
          ideas. Last weekend I visited my grandfather who lives in another
          state and a very, very small town. Of course what a shock. There is
          a deaf child who lives on his street, I thought if that child lived
          where I live what oppertunities he would have. So watching the
          locals and seeing their lives I left thinking I can understand how
          being someone here who thinks outside of the box would have to leave
          or just become numb. Again, seeing all the things around me how
          blessed I am all the choices I have, stores, friends, freedoms to
          really be who I want to be. So I belong to another
          > board more metaphyisics baised and there was a debate while I was
          gone on buddhism and enlightenment. I also live close to this
          community of people and work with in the lines. So personally
          knowing some of these people, this debate was heated and down right
          nasty, not to mention these are not people who have really and
          truely studied buddhism. I never get involved with this type of
          situation, but it must have been my trip and coming home seeing
          this, so I responded short and to the point. I used my compassion
          but I also used my mind. My intent came from a healing stand point
          but I have a difficult time with the directness. I have studied
          warriorship and I am wondering has anyone else and do they feel the
          same? Do you find it difficult with compassion and directness. I
          love the warriorship, I am going through a difficult custody
          situation my children have been harmed and I have no problem drawing
          my sword for them but with my peers it seems different. Any thoughts?
          >
          > Namaste,
          > Danielle
          >
          >
          > ------------ --------- --------- ---
          > See the all-new, redesigned Yahoo.com. Check it out.
          >



          Yahoo! Music Unlimited - Access over 1 million songs. Try it free.

        • nancy lemke
          no attachment,,,i would call it getting older and wiser. as we age we realize that we can speak our mind and very clearly too. it is all in how you speak not
          Message 4 of 7 , Aug 2 12:32 AM
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            no attachment,,,i would call it getting older and wiser. as we age
            we realize that we can speak our mind and very clearly too. it is
            all in how you speak not what you say. it's in the genes too. i am
            just like my mom when it comes to being candid. when i was in real
            estate i was known for my being candid but i had to learn to be more
            diplomatic. but, as i get older i have learned to think before i act
            or speak. nancy

            --- In Buddhism_101@yahoogroups.com, danielle wilson
            <hairteazer2002@...> wrote:
            >
            > Hey Nancy,
            >
            > What I find interesting is before I would avoid things like
            this. But now I find I speak my truth and I do feel I ask where is
            this coming from, is this right speach, or even any of my bussiness.
            But I am also speaking of shambahla training a lineage of buddhism.
            Before I would be terrified to be dealing with what I am dealing
            with my children, although standing up for them is by far easier.
            There are times to speak direct and I struggle with that. So I am
            wondering what is the attachment?
            >
            > nancy lemke <richardlemke@...> wrote:
            >
            > hi danielle, anger and drawing a sword can come easy if we let it.
            i
            > am also guilty of it sometimes. i try, my darnest, to stop first
            > and think about what i am about to do. then i somehow can realize
            > that it isn't worth it and it isn't what buddhism is all about.
            then
            > i can retreat and find compassion. i used to be a ready fighter as
            > i also have been thru some rough times and still am having
            physical
            > rough times even right now. it is easy to be defensive and not
            > compassionate...but worth the effort to be compassionate. namaste,
            > nan
            >
            > --- In Buddhism_101@yahoogroups.com, danielle wilson
            > <hairteazer2002@> wrote:
            > >
            > > Greetings everyone!!
            > >
            > > I sit here this morning in my usual routine scanning my messages
            > listening to my children debate what cereal is better, I live in
            > southern california and it is overcast (which I love) at the
            moment.
            > I only belong to a few boards, this is a new thing for me I am not
            a
            > computer person but I have given it a shot. I have to say I love
            > reading ideas and thoughts of others and how this can invoke our
            own
            > ideas. Last weekend I visited my grandfather who lives in another
            > state and a very, very small town. Of course what a shock. There
            is
            > a deaf child who lives on his street, I thought if that child
            lived
            > where I live what oppertunities he would have. So watching the
            > locals and seeing their lives I left thinking I can understand how
            > being someone here who thinks outside of the box would have to
            leave
            > or just become numb. Again, seeing all the things around me how
            > blessed I am all the choices I have, stores, friends, freedoms to
            > really be who I want to be. So I belong to another
            > > board more metaphyisics baised and there was a debate while I
            was
            > gone on buddhism and enlightenment. I also live close to this
            > community of people and work with in the lines. So personally
            > knowing some of these people, this debate was heated and down
            right
            > nasty, not to mention these are not people who have really and
            > truely studied buddhism. I never get involved with this type of
            > situation, but it must have been my trip and coming home seeing
            > this, so I responded short and to the point. I used my compassion
            > but I also used my mind. My intent came from a healing stand point
            > but I have a difficult time with the directness. I have studied
            > warriorship and I am wondering has anyone else and do they feel
            the
            > same? Do you find it difficult with compassion and directness. I
            > love the warriorship, I am going through a difficult custody
            > situation my children have been harmed and I have no problem
            drawing
            > my sword for them but with my peers it seems different. Any
            thoughts?
            > >
            > > Namaste,
            > > Danielle
            > >
            > >
            > > ---------------------------------
            > > See the all-new, redesigned Yahoo.com. Check it out.
            > >
            >
            >
            >
            >
            >
            >
            > ---------------------------------
            > Yahoo! Music Unlimited - Access over 1 million songs.Try it free.
            >
          • danielle wilson
            Thanks Nancy!! nancy lemke wrote: no attachment,,,i would call it getting older and wiser. as we age we realize that we can speak
            Message 5 of 7 , Aug 2 7:21 AM
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              Thanks Nancy!!


              nancy lemke <richardlemke@...> wrote:

              no attachment,,,i would call it getting older and wiser. as we age
              we realize that we can speak our mind and very clearly too. it is
              all in how you speak not what you say. it's in the genes too. i am
              just like my mom when it comes to being candid. when i was in real
              estate i was known for my being candid but i had to learn to be more
              diplomatic. but, as i get older i have learned to think before i act
              or speak. nancy

              --- In Buddhism_101@yahoogroups.com, danielle wilson
              <hairteazer2002@...> wrote:
              >
              > Hey Nancy,
              >
              > What I find interesting is before I would avoid things like
              this. But now I find I speak my truth and I do feel I ask where is
              this coming from, is this right speach, or even any of my bussiness.
              But I am also speaking of shambahla training a lineage of buddhism.
              Before I would be terrified to be dealing with what I am dealing
              with my children, although standing up for them is by far easier.
              There are times to speak direct and I struggle with that. So I am
              wondering what is the attachment?
              >
              > nancy lemke <richardlemke@...> wrote:
              >
              > hi danielle, anger and drawing a sword can come easy if we let it.
              i
              > am also guilty of it sometimes. i try, my darnest, to stop first
              > and think about what i am about to do. then i somehow can realize
              > that it isn't worth it and it isn't what buddhism is all about.
              then
              > i can retreat and find compassion. i used to be a ready fighter as
              > i also have been thru some rough times and still am having
              physical
              > rough times even right now. it is easy to be defensive and not
              > compassionate...but worth the effort to be compassionate. namaste,
              > nan
              >
              > --- In Buddhism_101@yahoogroups.com, danielle wilson
              > <hairteazer2002@> wrote:
              > >
              > > Greetings everyone!!
              > >
              > > I sit here this morning in my usual routine scanning my messages
              > listening to my children debate what cereal is better, I live in
              > southern california and it is overcast (which I love) at the
              moment.
              > I only belong to a few boards, this is a new thing for me I am not
              a
              > computer person but I have given it a shot. I have to say I love
              > reading ideas and thoughts of others and how this can invoke our
              own
              > ideas. Last weekend I visited my grandfather who lives in another
              > state and a very, very small town. Of course what a shock. There
              is
              > a deaf child who lives on his street, I thought if that child
              lived
              > where I live what oppertunities he would have. So watching the
              > locals and seeing their lives I left thinking I can understand how
              > being someone here who thinks outside of the box would have to
              leave
              > or just become numb. Again, seeing all the things around me how
              > blessed I am all the choices I have, stores, friends, freedoms to
              > really be who I want to be. So I belong to another
              > > board more metaphyisics baised and there was a debate while I
              was
              > gone on buddhism and enlightenment. I also live close to this
              > community of people and work with in the lines. So personally
              > knowing some of these people, this debate was heated and down
              right
              > nasty, not to mention these are not people who have really and
              > truely studied buddhism. I never get involved with this type of
              > situation, but it must have been my trip and coming home seeing
              > this, so I responded short and to the point. I used my compassion
              > but I also used my mind. My intent came from a healing stand point
              > but I have a difficult time with the directness. I have studied
              > warriorship and I am wondering has anyone else and do they feel
              the
              > same? Do you find it difficult with compassion and directness. I
              > love the warriorship, I am going through a difficult custody
              > situation my children have been harmed and I have no problem
              drawing
              > my sword for them but with my peers it seems different. Any
              thoughts?
              > >
              > > Namaste,
              > > Danielle
              > >
              > >
              > > ---------------------------------
              > > See the all-new, redesigned Yahoo.com. Check it out.
              > >
              >
              >
              >
              >
              >
              >
              > ---------------------------------
              > Yahoo! Music Unlimited - Access over 1 million songs.Try it free.
              >






              ---------------------------------
              Do you Yahoo!?
              Next-gen email? Have it all with the all-new Yahoo! Mail Beta.

              [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
            • John Pellecchia
              Danielle, Please excuse the lateness of my response but, as my father-in-law used to say, I wanted to mull it over in my mind and collect my thoughts a
              Message 6 of 7 , Aug 3 5:03 PM
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                Danielle,

                Please excuse the lateness of my response but, as my father-in-law
                used to say, I wanted to "mull it over in my mind" and collect my
                thoughts a little before I responded.

                I read with interest you comments regarding others and how to deal
                with them. Each of us has, and continue to have, much the same
                problem. That's why we witness strife in this world of samsara. Just
                look at the Middle East situation as an example of the extreme.

                As a very wise person wrote (and I paraphrase), "It is easier to
                practice loving-kindness alone in a hermitage than with others in the
                'real' world." Try to view those who try your patience as being placed
                there to teach you to be more patient -- and we all know how difficult
                that may be.

                Maybe the following passage from the VietNam Buddhist monk Thich Nhat
                Hanh's book "Living Buddha, Living Christ" may help explain. "...look
                at the person we consider to be the cause of our suffering. If we
                practice looking deeply into his situation and the causes of how he
                came to be the way he is now, and if we visualize ourselves as being
                born in his condition, we may see that we could have become exactly
                like him. When we do that, compassion arises in us naturally, and we
                see that the other person is to be helped and not punished. In that
                moment, our anger transforms itself into the energy of compassion.
                Suddenly, the one we have been calling our enemy becomes our brother
                or sister....Looking deeply is one of the most effective ways to
                transform our anger, prejudices and discrimination. We practice as an
                individual, and we also practice as a group."

                Certainly, this is not easy to accomplish. We all fall at some point
                but that's why it is called a "practice." It's like watching an infant
                taking his first steps. We totter and fall but we invariably
                (hopefully) get back up and try again. Eventually we will succeed if
                we continue our practice.

                In regard to "right speech" -- this is generally done without anger
                but to point out to the person the error of his/her ways. It is not
                done in a haughty, self-righteous manner. To continue with our
                hypothetical child, it is done in the same manner of correcting an
                infant who has put him/herself in a dangerous situation. We would
                naturally correct the child -- not out of anger or to "prove a point"
                but to instruct the child in what is safe for the child's own
                well-being. It is done out of love; not anger.

                Some people frequently misinterpret "right speech" as "the right to
                speak." Nothing is further from the truth. "Right to speak" means that
                I may express my views freely whether they be "right" or "wrong." It
                puts the power in the "I."

                "Right speech" is much deeper and more subtle in its meaning. It is an
                instructional means relating to The Dharma; to instruct others
                according to The Dharma when they stray from the path. Not to prove
                that "I know more than you" but that "I love you and want to help
                you." It is the intent as much as the wording.

                I do apologize for the rambling and any errors contained herein are
                mine alone.

                May all be at peace.

                John
              • hairteazer2002
                I came across this and thought I would share this with you. I know that there was some confusion in regards to the sword comment and I hope this can
                Message 7 of 7 , Aug 21 6:33 PM
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                  I came across this and thought I would share this with you. I know
                  that there was some confusion in regards to the "sword" comment and
                  I hope this can enlighten you on the use of this phrase.



                  Friend Swee Boon wrote:

                  >I like your sword simile! Thanks!

                  Here extended:
                  Awareness is the eye that sees what should be cut.
                  Investigation is the sword that cuts through.
                  Energy is the arm that swings the sword.
                  Joy is the force that propels the sword.
                  Tranquillity is the hand that holds the sword.
                  Concentration is the stone that sharpens the sword.
                  Equanimity is the scabbard that protects the sword.

                  Namaste

                  Danielle



                  --- In Buddhism_101@yahoogroups.com, "John Pellecchia" <pellejf@...>
                  wrote:
                  >
                  > Danielle,
                  >
                  > Please excuse the lateness of my response but, as my father-in-law
                  > used to say, I wanted to "mull it over in my mind" and collect my
                  > thoughts a little before I responded.
                  >
                  > I read with interest you comments regarding others and how to deal
                  > with them. Each of us has, and continue to have, much the same
                  > problem. That's why we witness strife in this world of samsara.
                  Just
                  > look at the Middle East situation as an example of the extreme.
                  >
                  > As a very wise person wrote (and I paraphrase), "It is easier to
                  > practice loving-kindness alone in a hermitage than with others in
                  the
                  > 'real' world." Try to view those who try your patience as being
                  placed
                  > there to teach you to be more patient -- and we all know how
                  difficult
                  > that may be.
                  >
                  > Maybe the following passage from the VietNam Buddhist monk Thich
                  Nhat
                  > Hanh's book "Living Buddha, Living Christ" may help
                  explain. "...look
                  > at the person we consider to be the cause of our suffering. If we
                  > practice looking deeply into his situation and the causes of how he
                  > came to be the way he is now, and if we visualize ourselves as
                  being
                  > born in his condition, we may see that we could have become exactly
                  > like him. When we do that, compassion arises in us naturally, and
                  we
                  > see that the other person is to be helped and not punished. In that
                  > moment, our anger transforms itself into the energy of compassion.
                  > Suddenly, the one we have been calling our enemy becomes our
                  brother
                  > or sister....Looking deeply is one of the most effective ways to
                  > transform our anger, prejudices and discrimination. We practice as
                  an
                  > individual, and we also practice as a group."
                  >
                  > Certainly, this is not easy to accomplish. We all fall at some
                  point
                  > but that's why it is called a "practice." It's like watching an
                  infant
                  > taking his first steps. We totter and fall but we invariably
                  > (hopefully) get back up and try again. Eventually we will succeed
                  if
                  > we continue our practice.
                  >
                  > In regard to "right speech" -- this is generally done without anger
                  > but to point out to the person the error of his/her ways. It is not
                  > done in a haughty, self-righteous manner. To continue with our
                  > hypothetical child, it is done in the same manner of correcting an
                  > infant who has put him/herself in a dangerous situation. We would
                  > naturally correct the child -- not out of anger or to "prove a
                  point"
                  > but to instruct the child in what is safe for the child's own
                  > well-being. It is done out of love; not anger.
                  >
                  > Some people frequently misinterpret "right speech" as "the right to
                  > speak." Nothing is further from the truth. "Right to speak" means
                  that
                  > I may express my views freely whether they be "right" or "wrong."
                  It
                  > puts the power in the "I."
                  >
                  > "Right speech" is much deeper and more subtle in its meaning. It
                  is an
                  > instructional means relating to The Dharma; to instruct others
                  > according to The Dharma when they stray from the path. Not to prove
                  > that "I know more than you" but that "I love you and want to help
                  > you." It is the intent as much as the wording.
                  >
                  > I do apologize for the rambling and any errors contained herein are
                  > mine alone.
                  >
                  > May all be at peace.
                  >
                  > John
                  >
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