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Bhante Gunaratana on lovingkindness

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  • sharon werner
    The loving-kindness that we want to cultivate is not an ordinary love as it is understood in everyday application. When you say, I love such-and-such a
    Message 1 of 4 , Nov 16, 2012
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      "The loving-kindness that we want to cultivate is not an ordinary
      love as it is understood in everyday application. When you say, 'I
      love such-and-such a person' or 'such-and-such a thing', for
      instance, what you really mean is that you desire that particular
      person's appearance, behavior, ideas, voice, or overall attitude;
      either towards you in particular or towards life in general. If that
      person changes the things you like very much in him or her you may
      decide that you do not love him or her. When your tastes, whims and
      fancies or that of the other person change, then you would not say 'I
      love so-and-so'. In this love-hate duality you love one and hate
      another. You love now and hate later. You love when you wish and hate
      when you wish. You love when everything is smooth and rosy and hate
      when anything goes wrong with the relationship between you and the
      other person or thing. If your love changes from time to time, place
      to place and situation to situation in this fashion then what you
      call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire--
      not love by any means.

      The kind of loving-kindness that we want to cultivate through
      meditation does not have its opposite or an ulterior motive.
      Therefore, the love-hate dichotomy does not apply to loving-kindness
      cultivated through wisdom or mindfulness, for it will never change
      into hate, as circumstantial changes take place. True loving-kindness
      is a natural faculty concealed under the heap of greed, hatred and
      ignorance. Nobody can give it to us. We must find it out within
      ourselves and cultivate it mindfully. Mindfulness discovers it,
      cultivates it and maintains it."

      ~ Meditation On Loving-Kindness (Metta)
      by Bhante H Gunaratana

      http://www.bhavanasociety.org/articles/bg009.htm


      May this be of benefit.
    • Tep Sastri
      Hi Sharon, Antony - 1. ..what you call love is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire-- not love by any means. Absolutely! In other words,
      Message 2 of 4 , Nov 17, 2012
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        Hi Sharon, Antony -

        1. "..what you call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire-- not love by any means."

        Absolutely! In other words, metta is not what the deluded world knows as "love". So, why do we call it loving-kindness?

        2. "True loving-kindness is a natural faculty concealed under the heap of greed, hatred and ignorance."

        In other words, metta transcends <it is on the separate domain from> greed, hatred and ignorance !

        My one cent.

        Tep
        ===
        --- In Buddhaviharas@yahoogroups.com, "sharon werner" <sharonwerner@...> wrote:
        >
        > "The loving-kindness that we want to cultivate is not an ordinary
        > love as it is understood in everyday application. When you say, 'I
        > love such-and-such a person' or 'such-and-such a thing', for
        > instance, what you really mean is that you desire that particular
        > person's appearance, behavior, ideas, voice, or overall attitude;
        > either towards you in particular or towards life in general. If that
        > person changes the things you like very much in him or her you may
        > decide that you do not love him or her. When your tastes, whims and
        > fancies or that of the other person change, then you would not say 'I
        > love so-and-so'. In this love-hate duality you love one and hate
        > another. You love now and hate later. You love when you wish and hate
        > when you wish. You love when everything is smooth and rosy and hate
        > when anything goes wrong with the relationship between you and the
        > other person or thing. If your love changes from time to time, place
        > to place and situation to situation in this fashion then what you
        > call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire--
        > not love by any means.
        >
        > The kind of loving-kindness that we want to cultivate through
        > meditation does not have its opposite or an ulterior motive.
        > Therefore, the love-hate dichotomy does not apply to loving-kindness
        > cultivated through wisdom or mindfulness, for it will never change
        > into hate, as circumstantial changes take place. True loving-kindness
        > is a natural faculty concealed under the heap of greed, hatred and
        > ignorance. Nobody can give it to us. We must find it out within
        > ourselves and cultivate it mindfully. Mindfulness discovers it,
        > cultivates it and maintains it."
        >
        > ~ Meditation On Loving-Kindness (Metta)
        > by Bhante H Gunaratana
        >
        > http://www.bhavanasociety.org/articles/bg009.htm
        >
        >
        > May this be of benefit.
        >
      • antony272b2
        Hi Tep, Sharon - BG 1. ..what you call love is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire-- not love by any means. ... T Absolutely! In other
        Message 3 of 4 , Nov 18, 2012
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          Hi Tep, Sharon -

          BG> 1. "..what you call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire-- not love by any means."
          >
          T> Absolutely! In other words, metta is not what the deluded world knows as "love". So, why do we call it loving-kindness?

          Antony: In the following Dhamma talk Thanissaro Bhikkhu says that Metta is goodwill and Love is actually another Pali word pema which the Buddha said leads to sorrow, lamentation etc.:
          http://www.dhammatalks.org/Archive/120508_Unsentimental_Good_Will.mp3
          From: Unsentimental Goodwill by Thanissaro Bhikkhu (mp3 audio)

          With metta / Antony.

          --- In Buddhaviharas@yahoogroups.com, "Tep Sastri" <tepsastri@...> wrote:
          >
          >
          > Hi Sharon, Antony -
          >
          > 1. "..what you call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire-- not love by any means."
          >
          > Absolutely! In other words, metta is not what the deluded world knows as "love". So, why do we call it loving-kindness?
          >
          > 2. "True loving-kindness is a natural faculty concealed under the heap of greed, hatred and ignorance."
          >
          > In other words, metta transcends <it is on the separate domain from> greed, hatred and ignorance !
          >
          > My one cent.
          >
          > Tep
          > ===
          > --- In Buddhaviharas@yahoogroups.com, "sharon werner" <sharonwerner@> wrote:
          > >
          > > "The loving-kindness that we want to cultivate is not an ordinary
          > > love as it is understood in everyday application. When you say, 'I
          > > love such-and-such a person' or 'such-and-such a thing', for
          > > instance, what you really mean is that you desire that particular
          > > person's appearance, behavior, ideas, voice, or overall attitude;
          > > either towards you in particular or towards life in general. If that
          > > person changes the things you like very much in him or her you may
          > > decide that you do not love him or her. When your tastes, whims and
          > > fancies or that of the other person change, then you would not say 'I
          > > love so-and-so'. In this love-hate duality you love one and hate
          > > another. You love now and hate later. You love when you wish and hate
          > > when you wish. You love when everything is smooth and rosy and hate
          > > when anything goes wrong with the relationship between you and the
          > > other person or thing. If your love changes from time to time, place
          > > to place and situation to situation in this fashion then what you
          > > call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire--
          > > not love by any means.
          > >
          > > The kind of loving-kindness that we want to cultivate through
          > > meditation does not have its opposite or an ulterior motive.
          > > Therefore, the love-hate dichotomy does not apply to loving-kindness
          > > cultivated through wisdom or mindfulness, for it will never change
          > > into hate, as circumstantial changes take place. True loving-kindness
          > > is a natural faculty concealed under the heap of greed, hatred and
          > > ignorance. Nobody can give it to us. We must find it out within
          > > ourselves and cultivate it mindfully. Mindfulness discovers it,
          > > cultivates it and maintains it."
          > >
          > > ~ Meditation On Loving-Kindness (Metta)
          > > by Bhante H Gunaratana
          > >
          > > http://www.bhavanasociety.org/articles/bg009.htm
          > >
          > >
          > > May this be of benefit.
          > >
          >
        • Tep Sastri
          Hello my friend Antony - Thanks for your reply. It is a good one. Be well & happy! Tep
          Message 4 of 4 , Nov 18, 2012
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            Hello my friend Antony -

            Thanks for your reply. It is a good one.

            Be well & happy!

            Tep
            ===
            --- In Buddhaviharas@yahoogroups.com, "antony272b2" <antony272b@...> wrote:
            >
            > Hi Tep, Sharon -
            >
            > BG> 1. "..what you call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire-- not love by any means."
            > >
            > T> Absolutely! In other words, metta is not what the deluded world knows as "love". So, why do we call it loving-kindness?
            >
            > Antony: In the following Dhamma talk Thanissaro Bhikkhu says that Metta is goodwill and Love is actually another Pali word pema which the Buddha said leads to sorrow, lamentation etc.:
            > http://www.dhammatalks.org/Archive/120508_Unsentimental_Good_Will.mp3
            > From: Unsentimental Goodwill by Thanissaro Bhikkhu (mp3 audio)
            >
            > With metta / Antony.
            >
            > --- In Buddhaviharas@yahoogroups.com, "Tep Sastri" <tepsastri@> wrote:
            > >
            > >
            > > Hi Sharon, Antony -
            > >
            > > 1. "..what you call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire-- not love by any means."
            > >
            > > Absolutely! In other words, metta is not what the deluded world knows as "love". So, why do we call it loving-kindness?
            > >
            > > 2. "True loving-kindness is a natural faculty concealed under the heap of greed, hatred and ignorance."
            > >
            > > In other words, metta transcends <it is on the separate domain from> greed, hatred and ignorance !
            > >
            > > My one cent.
            > >
            > > Tep
            > > ===
            > > --- In Buddhaviharas@yahoogroups.com, "sharon werner" <sharonwerner@> wrote:
            > > >
            > > > "The loving-kindness that we want to cultivate is not an ordinary
            > > > love as it is understood in everyday application. When you say, 'I
            > > > love such-and-such a person' or 'such-and-such a thing', for
            > > > instance, what you really mean is that you desire that particular
            > > > person's appearance, behavior, ideas, voice, or overall attitude;
            > > > either towards you in particular or towards life in general. If that
            > > > person changes the things you like very much in him or her you may
            > > > decide that you do not love him or her. When your tastes, whims and
            > > > fancies or that of the other person change, then you would not say 'I
            > > > love so-and-so'. In this love-hate duality you love one and hate
            > > > another. You love now and hate later. You love when you wish and hate
            > > > when you wish. You love when everything is smooth and rosy and hate
            > > > when anything goes wrong with the relationship between you and the
            > > > other person or thing. If your love changes from time to time, place
            > > > to place and situation to situation in this fashion then what you
            > > > call 'love' is not true loving-kindness but lust, greed, or desire--
            > > > not love by any means.
            > > >
            > > > The kind of loving-kindness that we want to cultivate through
            > > > meditation does not have its opposite or an ulterior motive.
            > > > Therefore, the love-hate dichotomy does not apply to loving-kindness
            > > > cultivated through wisdom or mindfulness, for it will never change
            > > > into hate, as circumstantial changes take place. True loving-kindness
            > > > is a natural faculty concealed under the heap of greed, hatred and
            > > > ignorance. Nobody can give it to us. We must find it out within
            > > > ourselves and cultivate it mindfully. Mindfulness discovers it,
            > > > cultivates it and maintains it."
            > > >
            > > > ~ Meditation On Loving-Kindness (Metta)
            > > > by Bhante H Gunaratana
            > > >
            > > > http://www.bhavanasociety.org/articles/bg009.htm
            > > >
            > > >
            > > > May this be of benefit.
            > > >
            > >
            >
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