6/10:(Joke) Borowitz-Congress Hires Illegal Immigrants to Write Immigration Bill
- National Immigrant Solidarity Network
Please Come! July 27-29 National Grassroots Immigrant Strategy Conference, Richmond, VA http://www.2007conference.net
*to join the immigrant Solidarity Network daily news litserv, send e-mail to: isn-subscribe@... or visit: http://lists.riseup.net/www/info/isn
(Joke) Congress Hires Illegal Immigrants to Write Immigration Bill
Lawmakers Cite Cost SavingsThe Borowitz Report: Waste Someone's TimeWinner Of The First-Ever National Press Club Award For HumorJune 10, 2007
In an attempt to break the nagging logjam over immigration, congressional leaders announced today that they were hiring illegal immigrants to write the nation’s new immigration bill.
While some observers criticized the decision to employ illegals to draft the very bill that would regulate themselves, Sen. John Kyl (R-Arizona) said that the move was a “win-win” for the American people.
“No one understands the thorny issue of immigration better than the people who have been sneaking into our country,” Mr. Kyl said. “Plus, these folks work cheap.”
One outspoken critic of the plan was CNN’s Lou Dobbs, who blasted Congress for putting illegal immigrants in charge of the nation’s immigration laws.
“This would be the equivalent of CNN outsourcing my xenophobic rants to Bangalore,” Mr. Dobbs said.
According to the plan, which went into effect at midnight, the U.S. will bus illegal aliens across the border to work as “guest congressmen” to draft the nation’s new immigration laws.
The illegals will remain in the country long enough to write the new immigration laws, after which they will be permitted to run for election for permanent congressman status.
Juan Carmelo Gutierrez, 35, a former migrant worker who is taking advantage of the “guest congressman” program, says that while drafting the nation’s immigration’s laws is arduous work, he still prefers it to his previous job.
“Being a congressman is definitely easier than picking fruit,” says Mr. Gutierrez. “Plus, you get most of the year off.”
Elsewhere, the New England Journal of Medicine reports that people who play excessive amounts of Nintendo Wii may experience shoulder pain and may also never lose their virginity.=================================================================
National Immigrant Solidarity Network
No Immigrant Bashing! Support Immigrant Rights!
New York: (212)330-8172
Los Angeles: (213)403-0131
Washington D.C.: (202)595-8990
Please consider making a donation to the important work of National Immigrant Solidarity Network
Send check pay to:
National Immigrant Solidarity Network/AFGJ
Send check to:
ActionLA / The Peace Center
8124 West 3rd Street, Suite 104
Los Angeles, California 90048
(All donations are tax deductible)
*to join the immigrant Solidarity Network daily news litserv, send e-mail to: isn-subscribe@...
or visit: http://lists.riseup.net/www/info/isn
*a monthly ISN monthly Action Alert! listserv, go to webpage http://lists.riseup.net/www/info/isn-digest
The web page has been design by Activist Design Studio
Please visit: http://www.ActivistDesign.net
**Please join our following listservs:
Asian American Labor Activism Alert!
send-e-mail to: api-la-subscribe@...
or visit: http://lists.riseup.net/www/info/api-la
New York, New Jersey and Pennsylvania areas immigrant workers information and alerts
send e-mail to: nyc-immigrantalert-subscribe@...
or visit: http://lists.riseup.net/www/info/nyc-immigrantalert
US-Mexico Border Information: No Militarization of Borders! Support Immigrant Rights!
send e-mail to: Border01email@example.com
or visit: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Border01/
Immigrant Deportation and Detention Alert!
send e-mail to: isn-deportees-subscribe@...
See what's free at AOL.com.