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Fwd: The [ immigration reform ] comedy of tragedy

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  • Al Soto
    Tere Quezada wrote: From: Tere Quezada To: Subject: The comedy of tragedy
    Message 1 of 1 , May 31, 2006
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      Tere Quezada <tere_quezada@...> wrote:
      From: "Tere Quezada" <tere_quezada@...>
      To: <Undisclosed-Recipient:;>
      Subject: The comedy of tragedy
      Date: Wed, 31 May 2006 13:08:49 -0500

      The comedy of tragedy
      The thin line between tears and laughter

      Fecha: 2006-05-30 14:14:09por: Rami Schwartz  (rami@...)

      Mexico, Mexicans, Fox, Bush, the National Guard, the Senate. These were the laughing stock of all comedians last week. From CBS to NBC, from Fox to Comedy Central, the tragedy of millions was the comedy of America. This proves once more that the Greeks were absolutely right, that the line between tragedy and comedy is very thin, that what makes millions cry in despair makes other laugh in amusement.

      They need no introduction, they are the kings of late night comedy in the United States, Jay Lenno, David Letterman, Conan O’Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, Carlos Mencia. And they all made fierce jokes about all the border situation and the millions who fled Mexico in despair, unable to make a living for them and their families. Here are some of the cruelest, funniest jokes.

      "The President of Mexico, Vicente Fox, is here in the United States for four days. Yea, that's how it starts. Four days, then four weeks and then four months. ... Actually when he arrived, he was greeted in the traditional manner. He was immediately offered a job at Wal-Mart." --Jay Leno

      "President Bush said, "You can't take millions of people with deep roots in the country and send them across the border." Really? Mexico did it." --Jay Leno

      "On Thursday, the president will follow up his speech by going to the Arizona border, which is historic. It will be the first time he's actually ever shown up with a National Guard unit." --Jay Leno

      "Vicente Fox told reporters he opposes building a wall along the border because it will not solve the immigration problem. What does he care if we build a wall? I wasn't sure if building a wall would work either until I heard the president of Mexico said don't build a wall. Now, I want to build a wall." --Jay Leno

      "I guess Vicente Fox wanted to get here before we tighten the immigration laws. ... Even though President Fox has only been in the United States two days, today the INS said they have no way to find him." --Jay Leno

      "Mexican President Vicente Fox arrived in the U.S. today. So, it's official. He's the last one. Turn out the lights. They are all here now." --Jay Leno

      "President Bush signed a huge tax cut bill. He's hoping the tax cut for the rich will attract a wealthier, more affluent group of illegal immigrants." --Jay Leno

      "President Bush said today he has nothing but respect for Mexico and its people and he will always speak the truth to them. Here's my question: When can we get that deal?" --Jay Leno

      "President Bush called for the National Guard to patrol the U.S.-Mexican border. The guards will track down and find illegals. That's not their job. They're trained to defend our country -- not track down and find people. Let's be honest, the Guard couldn't even track down and find President Bush when he was in the National Guard." --Jay Leno

      "Have you noticed you don't see those Taco Bell ads anymore? Remember the ones that said, 'Make a run for the border?' For some reason those seem to have fallen out of favor." --Jay Leno

      "President Bush said that these troops will be at the border temporarily. You know, just until Mexico is ready to govern itself. Sound familiar?" --Jay Leno

      "President Bush also said last night we do not yet have full control of the border. Full control? If we had any less control, there'd be an easy-pass lane." --Jay Leno

      "The president of Mexico has arrived in the U.S., thanks to some nifty fence climbing. ... I thought this was encouraging. He offered to take President Bush's job for $3 an hour cash." --David Letterman

      "President Bush is sending troops to the Mexican border. He's going to have them look for tequila of mass destruction." --David Letterman

      "He says before immigrants can become citizens of the United States, they should be able to speak proper English ... except for the word 'nuclear.'" --David Letterman

      "The Bush administration is tightening immigration now. In order to cross the United States, you have to have legal documentation. If you want to get into the United States you have to have legal documentation or a 95 mile an hour fast ball." --David Letterman

      "The Mexican border will now have surveillance cameras and motion detectors. Our borders will be as secure as The Gap." --David Letterman

      "President Vicente Fox of Mexico is on an official visit to the United States. Fox has only been in the U.S. for three days, and he's already got a job and a Social Security number." --Conan O'Brien

      "Vicente Fox, the president of Mexico, arrived in the United States today for a state visit. Unfortunately, Fox was caught at the border and sent back to Mexico." --Conan O'Brien

      "Immigration is the big issue right now. Earlier today, the Senate voted to build a 370-mile fence along the Mexican border. ... Experts say a 370-mile fence is the perfect way to protect a border that is 1,900 miles long." --Conan O'Brien

      "Attorney General Alberto Gonzales says he's not sure if his grandparents entered the United States legally. As a result, President Bush has sent the entire Gonzales family back to Ireland." --Conan O'Brien

      "President Bush announced a plan to send 6,000 members of the National Guard to patrol the U.S.-Mexico border. When asked where we'll come up with 6,000 additional troops, the president said, 'Simple, we'll hire illegal immigrants.'" --Conan O'Brien

      “The only way to stop illegal immigration is to make Mexico a better country and that will only happen if I become President of Mexico and declare the war on the United States” – Carlos Mencia

      "President Bush also said in his speech that immigrants have to learn English. The immigrants said, 'Hey, you first.'" –Carlos Mencia

      There it is, Mexico, Mexicans, Fox, Bush, Mexico’s institutions, the US Senate,, the National Guard, all became the laughing stock in this human drama that affects millions of people and families.

      Buy Hydrogen/Hybrid (1,000+mpg) or a Hydrogen fueled only (100+mpg) or Hybrid only Vehicles (45-50mpg), not a Hummers ( 4 - 9 mpg).  The government and the NEWS should reflect, not determine, the desires of the people.The cable news is a melodrama of constant trivia. Government is always corrupt, civil liberties only protect us from them.  The people must lead to survive corrupt governments. Read the constitution. (In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, this includes information for research and educational purposes.)  Al Soto (c) 2006


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