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RE: [BackpackGearTest] Edit/Approval -GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters

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  • Kathy Waters
    Richard, Thanks for your edits and comments. You are right about the cap opening. I added a couple of pictures as well as an additional (short) mention of
    Message 1 of 6 , Sep 8, 2013
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      Richard,

       

      Thanks for your edits and comments.  You are right about the cap opening.  I added a couple of pictures as well as an additional (short) mention of the two-cap staging.  Fixed the other edits except for the “it’s me”.  “It’s I” while grammatically correct is just too stilted for my style of writing.  Guess it was a good thing I never completed my pre-law, eh? <g>

       

      I’ve uploaded in your newly-minted folder and deleted the test file.

       

      Kathy

       

      From: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com [mailto:BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of richardglyon@...
      Sent: Friday, September 6, 2013 9:09 AM
      To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
      Subject: [BackpackGearTest] Edit/Approval -GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters

       

       

      Kathy,

      Here are your edits in the standard EDIT/Edit/Comment format. After revising you may upload to http://tinyurl.com/l3t94tp

      Cheers (raise a glass/plastic cup for me), Richard

      ###* Two-stage cap opening - wider mouth for filling plus an upper cap for
      drinking ###
      EDIT: I think you owe our readers a bit more detailed explanation of this feature. I have one of these carafes and know what you mean, but I think your description of filling it and drinking from it would benefit from a sentence or two or a photo.

      ### I often like to enjoy a celebratory summit toast - even when we don't actually "summit" - ###
      Comment: I myself often toast the first Friday since Wednesday. It's always 5 pm somewhere.

      ### Temperatures have spanned 4 seasons now since receiving the carafe, ###
      Edit: This would read better if you spelled out "four." A good rule with single-digit numbers in text.

      ### It's not the carafe's fault - it's me! ###
      Edit: "it's I" is grammatically correct.

      ### I found if I blow strongly into the carafe before I start to fill it, the carafe will expand and the envelope bottom will change from knife-edge to a more stable shape I can then stand on a flat surface.###
      Edit: a "that" before "I can" would help readability.

      ### Two of the most notable features of the carafe are its soft sides which
      enable it to be packed in my backpacks more easily than a glass, plastic or
      metal container and its negligible weight. ###
      Edit: The two items in the predicate object [soft sides and weight] are of significantly different lengths. Adding a comma after "container" would set them off better and make this long sentence easier to read.

    • zachtb1976
      Kathy, I wonder if you could use the following: It s not the carafe s fault - it s mine. Your fault instead of the carafe s fault. This should be technically
      Message 2 of 6 , Sep 8, 2013
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        Kathy,


        I wonder if you could use the following: "It's not the carafe's fault - it's mine." Your fault instead of the carafe's fault. This should be technically correct, and it is a little more relaxed.


        Is this the correct way to make suggestions? Should I even make suggestions if I am not the editor? Still trying to learn the Yahoo Groups world. 


        Newbie who's loving reading these reviews,

        Zach 





        --- In BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com, <backpackgeartest@yahoogroups.com> wrote:

        Richard,

         

        Thanks for your edits and comments.  You are right about the cap opening.  I added a couple of pictures as well as an additional (short) mention of the two-cap staging.  Fixed the other edits except for the “it’s me”.  “It’s I” while grammatically correct is just too stilted for my style of writing.  Guess it was a good thing I never completed my pre-law, eh? <g>

         

        I’ve uploaded in your newly-minted folder and deleted the test file.

         

        Kathy

         

        From: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com [mailto:BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of richardglyon@...
        Sent: Friday, September 6, 2013 9:09 AM
        To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
        Subject: [BackpackGearTest] Edit/Approval -GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters

         

         

        Kathy,

        Here are your edits in the standard EDIT/Edit/Comment format. After revising you may upload to http://tinyurl.com/l3t94tp

        Cheers (raise a glass/plastic cup for me), Richard

        ###* Two-stage cap opening - wider mouth for filling plus an upper cap for
        drinking ###
        EDIT: I think you owe our readers a bit more detailed explanation of this feature. I have one of these carafes and know what you mean, but I think your description of filling it and drinking from it would benefit from a sentence or two or a photo.

        ### I often like to enjoy a celebratory summit toast - even when we don't actually "summit" - ###
        Comment: I myself often toast the first Friday since Wednesday. It's always 5 pm somewhere.

        ### Temperatures have spanned 4 seasons now since receiving the carafe, ###
        Edit: This would read better if you spelled out "four." A good rule with single-digit numbers in text.

        ### It's not the carafe's fault - it's me! ###
        Edit: "it's I" is grammatically correct.

        ### I found if I blow strongly into the carafe before I start to fill it, the carafe will expand and the envelope bottom will change from knife-edge to a more stable shape I can then stand on a flat surface.###
        Edit: a "that" before "I can" would help readability.

        ### Two of the most notable features of the carafe are its soft sides which
        enable it to be packed in my backpacks more easily than a glass, plastic or
        metal container and its negligible weight. ###
        Edit: The two items in the predicate object [soft sides and weight] are of significantly different lengths. Adding a comma after "container" would set them off better and make this long sentence easier to read.

      • Kathy Waters
        Zach, You are right! That will work fine and I am going to change it and re-upload. I was trying to be “cute” and paraphrase the classic relationship
        Message 3 of 6 , Sep 9, 2013
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          Zach,

           

          You are right!  That will work fine and I am going to change it and re-upload.  I was trying to be “cute” and paraphrase the classic relationship ending cliché “It’s not you, it’s me”, but since two people didn’t get it, I have to admit, the idea obviously didn’t come across.

           

          Thank you for your suggestion and you as a member can always comment or ask questions by making the subject of your post “MEMBER COMMENT – product name – your name”.  Just don’t make any comments until AFTER the editor/test monitor has posted his/her edits.

           

          Kathy

           

          From: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com [mailto:BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of zachtb@...
          Sent: Sunday, September 8, 2013 8:28 PM
          To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
          Subject: RE: RE: [BackpackGearTest] Edit/Approval -GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters

           

           

          Kathy,

           

          I wonder if you could use the following: "It's not the carafe's fault - it's mine." Your fault instead of the carafe's fault. This should be technically correct, and it is a little more relaxed.

           

          Is this the correct way to make suggestions? Should I even make suggestions if I am not the editor? Still trying to learn the Yahoo Groups world. 

           

          Newbie who's loving reading these reviews,

          Zach 

           

           



          --- In BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com, <backpackgeartest@yahoogroups.com> wrote:

          Richard,

           

          Thanks for your edits and comments.  You are right about the cap opening.  I added a couple of pictures as well as an additional (short) mention of the two-cap staging.  Fixed the other edits except for the “it’s me”.  “It’s I” while grammatically correct is just too stilted for my style of writing.  Guess it was a good thing I never completed my pre-law, eh? <g>

           

          I’ve uploaded in your newly-minted folder and deleted the test file.

           

          Kathy

           

          From: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com [mailto:BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of richardglyon@...
          Sent: Friday, September 6, 2013 9:09 AM
          To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
          Subject: [BackpackGearTest] Edit/Approval -GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters

           

           

          Kathy,

          Here are your edits in the standard EDIT/Edit/Comment format. After revising you may upload to http://tinyurl.com/l3t94tp

          Cheers (raise a glass/plastic cup for me), Richard

          ###* Two-stage cap opening - wider mouth for filling plus an upper cap for
          drinking ###
          EDIT: I think you owe our readers a bit more detailed explanation of this feature. I have one of these carafes and know what you mean, but I think your description of filling it and drinking from it would benefit from a sentence or two or a photo.

          ### I often like to enjoy a celebratory summit toast - even when we don't actually "summit" - ###
          Comment: I myself often toast the first Friday since Wednesday. It's always 5 pm somewhere.

          ### Temperatures have spanned 4 seasons now since receiving the carafe, ###
          Edit: This would read better if you spelled out "four." A good rule with single-digit numbers in text.

          ### It's not the carafe's fault - it's me! ###
          Edit: "it's I" is grammatically correct.

          ### I found if I blow strongly into the carafe before I start to fill it, the carafe will expand and the envelope bottom will change from knife-edge to a more stable shape I can then stand on a flat surface.###
          Edit: a "that" before "I can" would help readability.

          ### Two of the most notable features of the carafe are its soft sides which
          enable it to be packed in my backpacks more easily than a glass, plastic or
          metal container and its negligible weight. ###
          Edit: The two items in the predicate object [soft sides and weight] are of significantly different lengths. Adding a comma after "container" would set them off better and make this long sentence easier to read.

        • chcoa
          Same goes for this one Kathy, no date. Possibly the report writer is goofed up again? Jamie D --- In backpackgeartest@yahoogroups.com,
          Message 4 of 6 , Sep 9, 2013
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             Same goes for this one Kathy, no date.  Possibly the report writer is goofed up again?


            Jamie D



            --- In backpackgeartest@yahoogroups.com, <kathy@...> wrote:

            Zach,

             

            You are right!  That will work fine and I am going to change it and re-upload.  I was trying to be “cute” and paraphrase the classic relationship ending cliché “It’s not you, it’s me”, but since two people didn’t get it, I have to admit, the idea obviously didn’t come across.

             

            Thank you for your suggestion and you as a member can always comment or ask questions by making the subject of your post “MEMBER COMMENT – product name – your name”.  Just don’t make any comments until AFTER the editor/test monitor has posted his/her edits.

             

            Kathy

             

            From: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com [mailto:BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of zachtb@...
            Sent: Sunday, September 8, 2013 8:28 PM
            To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
            Subject: RE: RE: [BackpackGearTest] Edit/Approval -GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters

             

             

            Kathy,

             

            I wonder if you could use the following: "It's not the carafe's fault - it's mine." Your fault instead of the carafe's fault. This should be technically correct, and it is a little more relaxed.

             

            Is this the correct way to make suggestions? Should I even make suggestions if I am not the editor? Still trying to learn the Yahoo Groups world. 

             

            Newbie who's loving reading these reviews,

            Zach 

             

             



            --- In BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com, <backpackgeartest@yahoogroups.com> wrote:

            Richard,

             

            Thanks for your edits and comments.  You are right about the cap opening.  I added a couple of pictures as well as an additional (short) mention of the two-cap staging.  Fixed the other edits except for the “it’s me”.  “It’s I” while grammatically correct is just too stilted for my style of writing.  Guess it was a good thing I never completed my pre-law, eh? <g>

             

            I’ve uploaded in your newly-minted folder and deleted the test file.

             

            Kathy

             

            From: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com [mailto:BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf Of richardglyon@...
            Sent: Friday, September 6, 2013 9:09 AM
            To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
            Subject: [BackpackGearTest] Edit/Approval -GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters

             

             

            Kathy,

            Here are your edits in the standard EDIT/Edit/Comment format. After revising you may upload to http://tinyurl.com/l3t94tp

            Cheers (raise a glass/plastic cup for me), Richard

            ###* Two-stage cap opening - wider mouth for filling plus an upper cap for
            drinking ###
            EDIT: I think you owe our readers a bit more detailed explanation of this feature. I have one of these carafes and know what you mean, but I think your description of filling it and drinking from it would benefit from a sentence or two or a photo.

            ### I often like to enjoy a celebratory summit toast - even when we don't actually "summit" - ###
            Comment: I myself often toast the first Friday since Wednesday. It's always 5 pm somewhere.

            ### Temperatures have spanned 4 seasons now since receiving the carafe, ###
            Edit: This would read better if you spelled out "four." A good rule with single-digit numbers in text.

            ### It's not the carafe's fault - it's me! ###
            Edit: "it's I" is grammatically correct.

            ### I found if I blow strongly into the carafe before I start to fill it, the carafe will expand and the envelope bottom will change from knife-edge to a more stable shape I can then stand on a flat surface.###
            Edit: a "that" before "I can" would help readability.

            ### Two of the most notable features of the carafe are its soft sides which
            enable it to be packed in my backpacks more easily than a glass, plastic or
            metal container and its negligible weight. ###
            Edit: The two items in the predicate object [soft sides and weight] are of significantly different lengths. Adding a comma after "container" would set them off better and make this long sentence easier to read.

          • richardglyon@att.net
            Zach, Excuse my delay in replying to your query. The approved procedure for commenting on a posted Owner Review is as you have done - posting a suggestion
            Message 5 of 6 , Sep 18, 2013
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              Zach,

              Excuse my delay in replying to your query. The approved procedure for commenting on a posted Owner Review is as you have done - posting a suggestion AFTER the editor has posted his edits. The subject line in the post should begin "Member Comment" to flag it for the writer and the editor, followed by the product and the author. E g, "Member Comment - GSI Soft Sided Wine Carafe - Kathleen Waters."

              Cheers, Richard
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