Re: Edit/Approval - Sea to Summit eVent Compression Sack - Katie Montovan
- Thanks Richard!
I have completed the edits, uploaded the html and deleted the file from the test folder.
--- In BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com, "richardglyon@..." <montana.angler@...> wrote:
> Well done, you're good to upload after the minor edits and suggestions below. There's already a folder for this product, just be sure to click the "Owner Review" tab when you upload. Don't forget to delete your Tests/OR folder copy.
> Cheers, Richard
> <<Size: Small Listed weight: 4.5 oz (129 g)>>
> Edit: to accord with the format you use consider putting the Listed Weight on a separate line.
> <<This stuff sack combines the packability of compression sacks with the protection of waterproof dry bags. The bag is made from air-permeable eVent waterproof fabric that allows the air to escape when the bag is compressed while still maintaining the waterproof seals. The top of the bag has two stiff sections that must be mated and folded over at least three times to create an effective watertight seal. The lid is attached with 4 straps and sliders that can be evenly tightened to compress the whole stuff sack. There is also a strap on the bottom of the stuff sack.>>
> Edit: Consider modifying the third and fourth sentences as follows: "The top of the bag has a dry bag closure - two stiff sections that must be mated and folded over at least three times to create an effective watertight seal. Like a compression sack, the lid is attached with 4 straps and sliders that can be evenly tightened to compress the whole stuff sack." This is strictly style, so entirely up to you, but I think the additions would reinforce your conclusion in the first sentence.
> << I usually use this compression sack to hold my sleeping bag (a Marmot Womens Pinnacle). >>
> EDIT: Women's
> <<but I hate trying to carry large compression sacks that become basketball shape when compressed. >>
> EDIT: basketball-shaped [spelling and hyphen]
> << When I am kayaking, this compression sack containing my sleeping bag sits in my kayak all day in the half-inch (1 cm) or so of water that is nearly impossible to avoid. >>
> Edit: Another suggestion for clarity: "the half-inch (1 cm) or so of standing water in the bottom of the boat that is nearly impossible to avoid. "