Thank you for your Owner Review, your initial edits will follow. They will take the following format;
EDIT: must be changed
Edit: should be changed but will be left to your discretion
Comment: just that or something to think about
We don't suggest making something like a stove (or backpack, shelter, GPS, etc) your first review as they really have a lot that needs to be discussed. I will go ahead and start the process with this, but if you would like to begin with an easier item just post that you would like to put this on hold.
When you have made the changes please repost here with REPOST added to the subject line. Include your name also please.
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First thing you need is a title. It should be: Coleman Dual Fuel 533 Stove
Comment: you may want to "disguise" your email address to keep it from being harvested by spammers. I do rayestrella AT hotmail DOT com
EDIT: we need a bit more than this. While you don't have to put your city if you don't want, at least put the area (north western Utah) and USA
*** I enjoy taking boy scouts on monthly campouts
EDIT: Boy Scouts (needs caps)
*** I typically carry a 40-45 pound pack for a week long trip, and a 25-30 lb for an overnighter.
EDIT: all numbers need the metric conversions. Plus if you use lb for one use it for both. "Week-long" needs a hyphen
EDIT: it is actually The Coleman Company, Inc.
***Year of Manufacture:
EDIT: this is missing. If you don't know the year change it to year of purchase and list that.
EDIT: we link to the top-level URL only, so in this case http://www.coleman.com
EDIT: where are you getting this MSRP? I see it as $79.99
***Listed Weight: 14.5 oz (411 g)
EDIT: where are you getting this info?
***Other details: Burns White Gas or Unleaded Fuel
EDIT: OK, here is where you will need to take some time. You need a product description section explain just what all this stove is. Take a look at some other stove reviews and reports for examples of what we are looking for. There is a lot to talk about.
***I have used the Coleman Dual Fuel 533 on many backpacking trips ranging from an over nighter to a week long trip near Kings Peak in Utah.
EDIT: from "overnighters" to a "week-long trip" near Kings Peak in Utah.
***Usually on overnighters I am with 6-10 boy scouts
EDIT: Boy Scouts
***On longer trips I bring a MSR Fuel bottle and can make it last for a whole week.
EDIT: the first time you use a brand name abbreviation the full name needs to be used with the abbreviation in parenthesis. (This applies to state names too.)
***(it holds 1.1 Liters of fuel)
EDIT: Capitalize "It" plus it needs the Imperial conversion (ounces). This is info that should be in the product description.
***I have used this stove on backpacking trips up to 13,000 feet in elevation, and
in temperatures down to the single digits (F).
EDIT: all numbers, weights, temps, volumes, etc. need the metric conversions. A great one can be found here: http://www.backpackgeartest.org/convert.html
***I have never had a problem with it's function or use.
***It's also hard to tell how much fuel is left in the canister. With the Coleman Dual Fuel 533 I can easily fill it up with fuel before a trip and know that I can make it. With a canister, it's hard to tell how much is in a used canister so you either risk it by taking it, or you take a spare that you don't need, or you buy a new one for each trip (resulting in many half empty bottles in your garage).
EDIT: you need to rewrite this to put it all in the first person. As it is right now you are projecting your thoughts on the reader. Here is my canned explanation.
"When you tighten the laces on the boots, you pull the shoestrings in an out and upward motion. Then you tie it with a double knot and you are ready to go down the trail."
This is a very common way to write, but in doing so we just said what "other people" would do, not our self. This is projecting our thoughts onto the reader. We do not know how other people tie their shoes. We keep away from "you" and "your" in our writing.
We are writing a review of "our" gear based on "our" experiences. So we need to keep it in the first person. Here is how it should look;
"When I tighten the laces on the boots, I pull the shoestrings in an out and upward motion. Then I tie it with a double knot and I'm ready to go down the trail."
So you need to say, It's also hard "for me" to tell how much fuel is left in the canister. And change all the "you" and "your"s to "I" and "me"
*** I wouldn't recommend it if you are trying to do ultralight backpacking as it is on the heavy side.
EDIT: we just talk about how the gear works for us, not if we think it will or won't work for others. Please remove this.
*** So when it is used on uneven ground, you have to either dig in
EDIT: the "you" thing again.
*** I have had a few coleman stoves and after I had one dry up and crack (making it useless), I have replaced them all with leather plungers. They hold the oil better and create a better seal.
EDIT: "Coleman", and this is good information and really should be in the main body of the review