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EDIT/Approval - Extrasport HiFloat PFD - Slim Woodruff

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  • richardglyon
    Slim, Just a few nitpicks this time, in the same format as before. After revising you may upload at http://tinyurl.com/y8hx8om Be sure to delete your
    Message 1 of 1 , Oct 5, 2009
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      Slim,

      Just a few nitpicks this time, in the same format as before. After revising you may upload at http://tinyurl.com/y8hx8om Be sure to delete your Tests/OR folder copy.

      Congratulations on your second OR, the posting of which makes you officially a Newbie and able to apply for gear. To do this you must join our companion list, backpackgeartestERS, and keep your eye out for posts beginning with "Test Call." Apply early and often!

      I hope you will continue to submit Owner Reviews. This will hone your report-writing skills and score points with the managers who recommend people for tests and the moderators who make the selections.

      Cheers, Richard

      <I don't know how to find or create the tinyurl link.>
      Comment: Go to www.tinyurl.com and follow the directions.

      <Extrasport HiFloat B27 PFD>
      EDIT: Set off your title and add underneath "Owner Review by Slim Woodruff"
      Edit: Consider larger type for the title.
      Edit: See fifth following EDIT. Optional here.

      <Overnights are usually four to six days long and cover 8 to10 miles per day (12.8 km to16 km).>
      EDIT: Add a space after "to" in both places it appears in this sentence.

      <URL of website>
      EDIT: Please write out the web address: www.extrasport.com.

      <Sizes: S (36-38) M (40-43) L(45-48) XL (48-52) Chest size>
      EDIT: Please add which size you own (Example: Size: M (40-43 chest). Also available in S (36-38) M (40-43) L(45-48) XL (48-52).
      EDIT: Add metric conversions

      <In 2001, I obtained a permit for a private river trip through the Grand Canyon. I wore a rented type III PFD rated for whitewater rivers.>
      EDIT: It may be obvious to you, but probably not to all readers, that PFD stands for "personal flotation device." Change to "type III personal flotation device (PFD)" here, the first time you use the term in text. Consider changing your title to "Extrasport HiFloat B27 personal flotation device"

      <1.Slightly uncomfortable (but aren't they all?)
      EDIT: Add a space between the period and "Slightly."
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