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Re: EDIT - KEEN VOYAGEUR MID Hiking Boot - Paul Schilke

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  • richardglyon
    Paul, I agree with you. Consider that an Edit rather than an EDIT. Richard
    Message 1 of 3 , Sep 24, 2009
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      Paul, I agree with you. Consider that an Edit rather than an EDIT. Richard
      --- In BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com, Paul Schilke <swhiker@...> wrote:
      >
      > Hi Richard,
      >
      > I feel that listing the state where the cities are located is redundant when the first sentence lists all of the hikes as occuring in Northern Arizona.  I will go ahead and add the extra arizona references when I add the other changes.  Thank you for the time you have put into reading this review.
      >
      > -Paul
      >
      >
      >
      >
      > ________________________________
      > From: richardglyon <rlyon@...>
      > To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
      > Sent: Tuesday, September 22, 2009 4:30:54 PM
      > Subject: [BackpackGearTest] EDIT - KEEN VOYAGEUR MID Hiking Boot - Paul Schilke
      >
      >  
      > Paul,
      >
      > Much improved, though you didn't incorporate two of my EDITS from the first round. Here are my edits for your Owner Review of the Keen Voyageur hiking boots. Same format as before: EDIT (all caps) = required change; Edit (initial cap) = a suggested change; and Comment is just that, with no change required.
      >
      > After making the necessary revisions please repost the plain text version to this list, with REPOST, the product name, and your name in the subject line, AND also post an html version, with photographs, in the Tests/Owner Reviews folder on backpackgeartest. org. Include a tinyurl or snipurl link to the html version in your list posting.
      >
      > Cheers, Richard
      >
      > General Edit: Consider formatting the pictures with text adjacent to the photos.
      >
      > <Year of Manufacture: Purchased in early 2009>
      > Edit: You could simply state "Year of Purchase: 2009"
      >
      > <Sizes Available: Men's 7 to 17
      > Edit: You might note that these are available in half sizes through size 12.
      > EDIT: Men's US 7 to 17, for the reason given in my initial EDIT.
      >
      > <HYBRID.OLOGIES:
      > S3
      > Shock, suspension, stability â€" otherwise known as S3 â€" is engineered to support
      > the foot on impact, dissipate shock and reduce your odds of twisting an ankle.
      > METATOMICAL FOOTBED DESIGN
      > This internal support mechanism is anatomically engineered to provide excellent
      > arch support and cradle the natural contours of the foot.>
      > EDIT: This entire section is a quotation from KEEN's website and must be attributed (by using quotation marks or a note that this is a quote, as you do under "REVIEW").
      > Edit: It would help the reader if you explained KEEN's coined word â€" Hybrid.ology.
      >
      > <The first was a four day trip into Sedona's Red Rock/Secret Mountain Wilderness with a load weighing over 50 lb (22.7 kg). The final trip was a three day hike into the Blue Range Primitive Area with a pack weight of 50 lb (22.7 kg)>
      > EDIT: Need the states for the two hiking venues, for the reason given in my earlier EDIT.
      > Edit: I'd round off the metric conversion to 23 kg unless your pack weight was exactly 50 lb.
      > Edit: "four-day" and "three-day" [with hyphens]
      >
      > < As indicated in Image 2 , the second lace loop from top is routed under the ankle bone to an anchor point on the back of the heel.>
      > EDIT: Delete the space after "Image 2" before the comma..
      >
      > < The toebox is truly roomy and I never stubbed or bruised my toes while wearing this shoe, but I cannot say that I have ever stubbed a toe while hiking. However, the toebox is roomy and I have not felt the need to furiously trim my toenails after climbing thousands of feet>
      > Edit: My dictionary has "toe box" as two words.
      > Edit: You could delete "the toebox is roomy" in the second sentence; it's redundant.
      >
      > < The KEEN toe is still firmly attatched to both boots.>
      > EDIT: attached [spelling]
      >
      > < The shoelaces provided by the maunfacturer are too long.>
      > EDIT: manufacturer [spelling]
      > Edit: "too long for me" would be better, to avoid projection.
      >
      > <The Metatomical Footbed, shows the indentation of my feet.>
      > EDIT: Delete the comma.
      >
      >
      >
      >
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