Edit/Approval- Gregory Z30 Cheryl McMurray
- Cheryl, Thanks and good job. Just a few nits below, in the same format: EDIT is a required change, Edit a suggested change, Comment a comment. After revising you may upload to http://tinyurl.com/pbxadp Be sure to delete your Tests/OR folder copy. Cheers, Richard
< I have camped in snow, freezing temperatures, winds (once was gale force), but mostly fair weather encounters so far.>
Edit: Your meaning is clear, so no change required, but for proper grammar you should delete "encounters."
<The strap adjustments include side compression straps (two on each side), chest strap, waist belt, shoulder straps, load lifters, and hip stabilizers.>
Edit: What you call a chest strap is usually called a "sternum strap."
<It has two side elastic pockets that will carry a one liter water bottle and/or thermos of coffee>
Edit: one-liter [with a hyphen]Look for this elsewhere in your review if you decide to change.
< There is also a zipper on the upper inside main compartment through which one can access the frame but is very small.>
EDIT: but it is very small
<This day hike was 14 mi (22.5 km) and 4,400 ft (1300 m) elevation
EDIT: Add a period at the end of this sentence.
< Due to the curved mesh backing of the pack, it produces a curve inside the main compartment that makes accessing items in the lower area difficult when using a 3 liter hydration bladder.>
Edit: This sentence is a bit awkward. Consider "The curved mesh backing of the pack produces a curve inside the main compartment . . ."
<I have used this day pack on every 3 season hike I have taken since my purchase in 2007.>
Edit: 3-season [with a hyphen] As above.
<I don't use this in winter as I feel it is too small for extra winter clothing, ice axe, crampon, and possibly snowshoes.>
EDIT: crampons [plural]