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74067Re: [BackpackGearTest] UPLOADED (and BIP) - OR - Bull Frog Quick Gel Sunblock - Mike Curry

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  • theMiddleSister@usaring.com
    Aug 1, 2007
    • 0 Attachment
      Mike,

      Thanks for the heads-up on the upload. I checked it out and the OR is just fine and dandy now. Thank you for so graciously taking my edits/comments.

      Kathy
      OR Editor

      ----- Original Message -----
      From: Mike C.
      To: BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com
      Sent: Wednesday, August 01, 2007 1:52 AM
      Subject: [BackpackGearTest] UPLOADED (and BIP) - OR - Bull Frog Quick Gel Sunblock - Mike Curry


      Kathy,

      Edits have been made, and HTML uploaded per your instructions at
      http://tinyurl.com/36cf7r (with a whole hour and ten minutes left in
      the July OR call!).

      I believe I got everything, but I'm pretty exhausted after my trip
      so if you wouldn't mind giving it the once-over, I'd appreciate it.
      I will tomorrow either way.

      Thanks again!

      Mike C.

      --- In BackpackGearTest@yahoogroups.com, "theMiddleSister@..."
      <TheMiddleSister@...> wrote:
      >
      > Mike,
      >
      >
      >
      > I have been assigned to edit your OR. It sounds like you are a
      very experienced user of Bull Frog. You answered any questions I
      had about the product (well, you WILL have answered when you are
      done with my edits!).
      >
      >
      >
      > My list of edits follows. Let me know if you don't understand
      anything I've
      > written.
      >
      > Conventionally the following terms are used in the editing process:
      > *** EDIT: you must fix this to comply with BackpackGearTest
      standards
      > [because the Editor says so!]
      > *** Edit: you should seriously consider fixing this in some way
      [unless you
      > seriously object with good reason]
      > *** Comment: usually just that, although you might want to make a
      change of
      > some sort as a result.
      >
      >
      > After you correct these you can go ahead and delete the file from
      the test folder and upload to the folder at
      http://www.backpackgeartest.org/reviews/Health%20&%
      20Safety/Sunscreens/BullFrog%20Quik%20Gel%20Sunblock/
      >
      > Thanks!
      >
      > Kathy Waters
      >
      > OR Editor
      >
      >
      >
      > ________________________________________________
      >
      >
      >
      > EDIT: The product name according to the manufacturer's website
      is "BullFrog Quick Gel Sunblock" with no space between Bull and Frog
      and a space between Quick and Gel with Gel capitalized. Also, since
      there are more than one BullFrog sunscreen product on the market, it
      would be more specific if you used "Quick Gel" instead of "BullFrog"
      in places where you don't want to spell out the whole product name.
      Please correct. A quick "find and replace" will help you here.
      >
      >
      >
      > Manufacturer: Bull Frog
      >
      > EDIT: The manufacturer is actually Chattem, Inc. BullFrog is
      just one of their brands.
      >
      >
      >
      > Manufacturer's Website: <<HYPERLINK GOES HERE -
      > "http://www.bullfrogsunscreen.com/quik.html" LINK TEXT
      > = "http://www.bullfrogsunscreen.com/quik.html">>
      >
      > EDIT: The URL should be the main website URL in case pages change
      within the site. Please change to "http://www.chattem.com/".
      >
      >
      >
      > Listed Weight: None
      > Measured Weight: Varies with use
      > Other details: The most recent bottle of the product tested was a 4
      > fl oz (118 ml) bottle. It is now sold in 5 fl oz (148) bottles.
      >
      > Edit: This is a bit awkward. I think you would be best off just
      listing the Listed Weight as "5 fl oz" with the metric conversion -
      this part is an EDIT - and delete the rest (Measured Weight and
      Other details) out. The product is only available in the 5 fl oz
      size currently and since you are talking about the "fl oz" and not
      the weight of the container, etc., I don't think it adds to the
      report in anyway. *** If any other editor wants to "weigh in" on
      this .
      >
      >
      >
      >
      > I laugh when I look at the bottle where it says, "dries instantly.'
      >
      > EDIT - Change the single quote mark at the end of the sentence to
      a double quote mark.
      >
      >
      >
      > Bull Frog not only can stand up to my sweat, but it will take all
      the stream or river fords I can find and swims in alpine lakes in
      stride.
      >
      > Edit - While I get what you are saying here, this sentence reads
      in a confusing manner. Right now it sounds like the BullFrog "swims
      in alpine lakes in stride" which bull frogs probably do J
      >
      > Maybe if you reword this into two sentences it would make more
      sense to me.
      >
      >
      >
      > One suggestion regarding using this product while backpacking: I
      am always very careful to wash this stuff off with soap and water
      before turning into my sleeping bag. The stickiness factor, combined
      with its dust-magnet properties, make it tough for me to sleep (and
      messy!) if I don't wash it off. Soap is an absolute requirement to
      remove the product, so I suggest carrying soap and washing it off
      before turning in for the night.
      > Edit - I "suggest" to avoid projection you remove the
      words "suggestion" and "suggest" and have this paragraph only
      reflect your extensive experience. Personally, I'd just delete the
      first sentence and change the last to read ".so I carry soap and
      wash it off before."
      >
      >
      >
      > *High sun protection factor (SPF)
      >
      > EDIT - And the SPF is ????? Since you don't mention it anywhere
      in your review, you might add it here. COMMENT - This would be a
      good spec to put in the "Other details" section up top, too.
      >
      >
      > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
      >





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