X-Book 4 -- Of Politics, Tacos and Other Things that Give You
Chapter 22: Secret Lair Laugh
Rating: PG-13 (violence, language)
Genre: Crossover (with anything I can squeeze in), SPOILERS FOR X2
Summary: See prologue to book 4
Disclaimer: I own nothing in regards to the Marvel characters or
any character from a previously published source portrayed in this
Reviews: Any feedback would be great and is appreciated!
A short while later, Pyro was sitting on a bed in one guest room,
still looking a little stunned by the unexpected decision to allow
him to stay in New York. He had only brought one travel bag with
him, which had not contained much else besides a change of clothes
and a few CD selections he had shoved in there as an afterthought.
He was snapping his lighter repeatedly against his hand, unsure of
what he was supposed to do next.
He was sitting in an awesome house, close to one of the biggest
cities in the world, and he was going to be training with another
pyretic, one mutant who could manipulate glass and one vampire...
"Too weird, man," he mumbled to himself, as a grin spread over his
Pyro jumped a little as someone knocked on his door.
"Um..." he said, surprised at the courtesy, "Come in?"
The door opened and he grinned again, as Sid walked in carrying an
armload of spare blankets and towels. The look on Sid's face was
irritated, and Rebecca was following directly behind him, talking
quickly and frowning.
"I don't care..." she said loudly and Sid rolled his eyes, "We're
not taking him to the Council training room in the city. That place
is barely up to Slayer code, let alone fireproof..."
"Well, it's not like the basement gym is up to par here either," Sid
shot back, dropping the pile of blankets next to their new
boarder, "Where else is there to go that's nearby? What...you wanna
take the kid to one of the Underground's training rooms?"
"No...not yet," Rebecca answered, "But...that really would be the
best place! No one knows how to handle fire like they do..."
"What's the Underground?" Pyro asked, and the twins glanced at him.
"Shh..." Sid said with a grin, and glanced out in the hall before
pushing the door shut, "It's sort of a club...they've got one in
almost every city in the world."
"It's where most of our friends stop by when they're passing
through," Rebecca added, "They're not really people Sebastian likes
us associating with, but he deals with it."
"Other mutants?" Pyro asked.
Sid nodded, "Mutants...humans...miscellaneous."
"Miscellaneous?" Pyro asked, "You mean more like your uncle?"
"And then some," Rebecca said, and then gave him an amused
frown, "This stuff's not freaking you out, is it?"
Pyro shrugged, "I'll tell you after I meet the miscellaneous."
"That won't be right away," Sid said, "Maybe in a few weeks...once
Bas gets used to having you around."
"Cool..." Pyro replied.
"Until then..." Sid said glancing back at his sister, "We're gonna
have to clean out the basement so we can use that for training. Or
out in the back lot..."
"First," Rebecca interrupted him, "We need to go get something to
eat. How do you feel about Taco Bell, kid?"
Pyro frowned, "Kid? I feel fine about it...old woman..."
Sid burst out in laughter as Rebecca glared at the teenager in
"Sorry," Pyro added, "But you're not that much older than me, right?"
Sid was still laughing, "The kid's gonna fit right in..."
"Oh, ha ha, Sid," Rebecca replied, "But maybe you shouldn't be
laughing. We do share a birthday, you and I. So I'm going to take
Pyro's `old woman' comment to actually be a reference to an `old
man' comment directed at you. We pyretics are clever with our
"Whatever you wanna tell yourself, Bec," Sid replied.
"Whatever..." Rebecca said, grabbing him by the lapels, "Let's just
go eat for, God's sake. Tacos would be ideal, but you may want to
watch your old man waistline, old man..."
Pyro stood and followed them out of the room, "Hey, those are good
code names for you guys."
"Yeah," Rebecca agreed, "Old woman is a great code name for Sid."
"Jesus, Bec, you've just gotta keep being the instigator, right?"
Sid said back, throwing his hands into the air with mock disgust.
Rebecca laughed, "Yes, I do."
As they entered the living room, they spotted Magneto sitting in one
large chair, reading a local news paper quietly. At least...it had
been quiet. Toad was crouching near the front door and Mystique was
seated near their leader, both silently watching the others as they
walked out of the back hall
"Hey, maybe that can be my secret code name..." Rebecca chimed
"What...The Instigator?" Sid asked.
"YES!" Rebecca said dramatically, grabbing a jacket from a coat rack
and using her good arm to throw it around her like a cape.
Sid and Pyro had to take a step back as the injured young woman
stepped up onto an ottoman and stood at attention. Magneto watched
them curiously over his book, trying not to look amused.
"I am the Instigator!" Rebecca announced grandly, "Fear my words!
For I will pick a fight with anyone about anything for absolutely no
reason at all! Welcome to my secret lair! MwaaHaHaHa..."
Sid gave her a scoffing grin
"What the fuck was that?" he asked her with a laugh.
"What..." she replied with annoyance, "What was what?"
"That..." he started, "That last bit. That 'mwahahaha.' What was
"What do you mean?" she said, sounding hurt at her brother's
questioning, "Everybody with a secret lair does that. You know,
it's in all the movies. 'Welcome to my secret lair! MwaaHaHaHa!"
Sid scoffed again, "No, they don't."
Rebecca frowned angrily, "They do so. Anyone with a secret lair
"Bec, I'm sure not everyone with a secret lair says 'MwaaHaHaHa!"
"I'm telling you they do!"
"No, they don't."
"Yes, they do!"
Erik rolled his eyes, deciding their conversation was far too silly,
and interrupted their dialogue by clearing his throat loudly.
"Ahem. I have...never....made that noise," he announced, quite
commandingly, but struggled not to grin.
Sid looked quite pleased and smug and Rebecca rolled her eyes in
"Alright," she said, "Alright, not EVERYONE with a secret lair makes
that noise. I apologize, Mr. Lensherr, for feeding stereotypes.
Fine...Sid, you were right..."
"Ha," Sid chuckled victoriously, but by the look on her face, Erik
doubted Rebecca would let her brother win so easily.
"However," Rebecca announced loudly, "That does not mean that I will
not say it! Now...I hunger. Sid...Pyro...Let us go to my secret
"D'you mean Taco Bell?" Pyro asked with a wicked grin.
"Yes!" she continued in the mock deep voice, "To Taco Bell! My
secret lair lies south of the border! MwaaHaHaHa!"
"Becca!" Sebastian's voice echoed from somewhere, "Get off the
"Jeez..." she mumbled, stepping down carefully, "You people are no
Rebecca led Pyro and Sid out of the room in a much more subdued
manner and Erik shook his head and sighed.
Toad glanced over at him, a bewildered glared on his face.
"You sure you want to leave Pyro here?" he asked and Magneto could
only chuckle quietly in response.
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