TITLE: Party Songs (Or A Westchester Mall Experience)
SUMMARY: Shopping with Jubilee is always an experience, but shopping with Jubes, Kitty, Rogue, Bobby, St John *and* Logan is chaos!
RATING: G - PG
FEEDBACK: Is craved like chocolate.
DISTRIBUTION: The Data Annex. Anyone else, ask and ye shall receive.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own 'em people. Well actually I own Katya, everyone else belongs to Marvel and 20th Century Fox. I'm not making any money from this, if I were, do you think I'd still be dragging my 'not morning person' butt out of bed at an ungodly hour of the morning to go to school? No, didn't think so.
Author's Notes: This story hasn't been betad, so any mistakes are my own. Also this is my first fully X-Men fic, so I'd love lots of feedback. This initially started as a scene in another story I'm writing but it soon took on a life of it's own, so now it's a stand alone. Oh, and I don't own the songs. I'm not entirely sure who does, but it ain't me.
The local radio station has a lot to answer for.
At least in my opinon. I'm fairly certain that Logan would agree with me on this. In fact, all of the teachers at Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, would agree with me on this.
All week the station had been playing the 'Top 500 Party Songs of All Time', culminating with the top 100 on Saturday night. That in itself wasn't bad, in fact most of the music had been pretty good, with a lot of stuff from the 80's and 70's. I'd enjoyed it, and the impromptu party that the kids had thrown, discovering music that I hadn't heard before. Now I wish that I'd never heard it at all. And I most certainly wish that the kids had done something else, anything else, other than hold that party. The least they could have done was listen to another station.
It's now Monday. Did I mention that they had taped 'The Top 500 Party Songs of All Time'? All of Sunday the kids (although I really shouldn't call them that, the youngest of 'The Group' was now twenty) had been playing some of the novelty songs over and over again. Which was fine the first time or two...or five that I heard them. However by the 20th repeat I was ready to throw their tape players out one of the windows.
Today, after lunch, familiar music had begun to echo throughout the mansion. Professor Xavier had, in a moment of desperation -- there were no classes scheduled for that afternoon -- suggested that the culprits, AKA 'The Group', go shopping to get Katya, a newly arrived student, some more clothes. They'd agreed of course, anything to get out and cause a bit of chaos. (Actually, they never meant to cause chaos, it's just that it seemed to follow them. Possibly due to Jubilee, whose middle name was...you guessed it...chaos.) How both Logan and I got talked into this was completely beyond my comprehension. One moment I'd been agreeing with the Professor that it was a good idea, the next I was appointed chaperone.
They were twenty year olds, they didn't need a chaperone! Both Logan and I, with backup from the people in question, had pointed this out to Xavier, only to be told that 'I'd just feel better if you all went.' So we did.
Now I'm questioning two things. The first being whether or not it had been wise to let Jubilee buy, let alone ingest, that much rock candy; the second being my whole position on the 'They're twenty, they don't need a chaperone' stance. Because this really proved that they did.
It should be pointed out here, that shopping with Jubilee is always an...um...interesting...experience. When Jubilee is on a major sugar high, and the rest of 'The Group' is in a playful mood, it's chaos.
Upon entering the Westchester Mall, Jubilee and Kitty had headed in one direction, dragging Rogue and Katya with them to the nearest pharmacy, while Bobby and St John had headed in another as they'd discovered a new computer software store. After Logan and I had finally dragged both groups out of their respective stores and informed them that they were here to buy clothes, and just clothes, Jubilee had looked at us both with her patented 'for-such-a-smart-person-you-really-are-dumb' look, and informed us that they also needed a few 'necessities'.
I'm sure that I went bright red when I realised what she meant, and judging from Rogue's smothered chuckles, so had Logan. After that everything had just gotten progressively more out of hand.
Stopping in at every clothing store they passed, they'd tried to find something for Katya to wear. Normally this wouldn't have been a problem. But Katya and Jubilee had very different ideas on clothing. Jubilee went for 'expensive and somewhat outrageous' while Katya went for 'cheap, shapeless, colorless and fade-into-the-shadows'. By the tenth store, the only piece of clothing they'd bought was a brown woollen sweater that Rogue had found.
"Why not just head for a department store?" Logan had asked, and Jubilee had protested but eventually agreed. She still insisted on checking out every clothing store between here and the nearest department store however. And there were hundreds of them! Fortunately most were boutique stores, that Katya took one look at and kept walking.
Maybe I should explain something here. Katya is from a very strict, very old fashioned, very catholic background. You know the type, whether from history books or real life. Father ruled the family, the women should be seen, not heard. The men worked, the women were only good for keeping a man's home...etc.
If Katya personifies the result of this style of ubringing, I've got to say, I hate it. She startles easily and has no self-confidence at all. Of course that could have something do do with being called a demon when her mutantcy manifested, and she started to turn red and have flames shoot out of her fingers when she got worked up. And I don't mean red as in normal human blush. I mean red like a fire engine.
Despite her lack of self-confidence however she does have an incredible amount of stubborness and grit, as Remy discovered when he turned on the charm and got a little to close. (Three days later, he's still using the bruises to wrangle pity out of the younger girls.) I think it took all of her grit to stand up to Jubes on the clothes issue, rather than let Jubes deck her out. Which had led to the next problem.
Sometime around the 6th rejected store, Jubilee and Kitty had started singing.
//"Open the door, get on the floor
Everyone walk the Dinosaur!"//
Logan growled, I groaned. We'd gotten out of the mansion to get away from this song. So of course Rogue, Bobby and St John joined in.
There are a few things you get used to when you're a mutant. One is being stared at. And everyone was staring at them, and by association us, as they passed.
Next to me Logan growled low in his throat and mumbled something that sounded vaguely like 'mmph grmmd diiisss'. Despite having taught at a school for teenagers for a few years and having first aided my fair share of '<Insert Person Here> whacked me in the mouth', I couldn't understand what he'd said, although if it was anything along the same lines as my current thoughts, it would involve muzzles, gags and leashes.
Finally we managed to get the (still singing - Agado by now) group into the department store and into the teen section.
Bobby and St John took one look at the look on Jubes' face, knew we'd be here for awhile, and dissapeared. Logan followed suit.
Katya took one look at the clothing, and headed for the menswear department. Kitty caught her arm before she'd gotten more than a few steps. "What's wrong?"
"It's pink!" she exclaimed horrified, as she gestured to the section.
In fact it wasn't just pink. It was Pink. With a capital P. I have to wonder at designers. And store buyers. Ok, so pink is the *in* color for this season, but does everything in the department have to be that color? What about the people who don't look good in pink? Or those who just hate the color?
"Not all of it." Jubilee held up a black skirt. "This isn't pink."
"Jubileeeee." Rogue groaned as she examined the skirt. "She won't wear that! Heck, *you* wouldn't wear that. Hemlines have to fall *below* the knee, not just below the waist, remember?"
"You guys are no fun."
And so it continued. Jubilee kept suggesting clothing that Katya found unacceptable, and Jubilee found most of the clothes that Katya did like drab. It was left up to Rogue and Kitty to mediate their arguments. I'm sure the manager would be very happy with them if he had any idea how many times they'd managed to calm both Jubilee and Katya so that they wouldn't accidentally set fire to a rack of clothing.
Eventually they got what they needed and headed for the dressing rooms. I was relieved. It was almost over. Then they took a detour through the lingerie department.
I decided that it was a good time to check out that new tool set I've had my eye on, and told them to meet me at the checkouts in half an hour.
After the half hour was up I headed for the cashiers. Now to get to from the Hardware department to the front registers you pass quite a few departments. Auto Care, Sporting Goods, Photographic, Books, Stationery, AudioVisual...
That's all it took to stop me dead in my tracks. I knew that voice. More importantly I knew what those words and that tone, in that voice mean.
Bobby had frozen something. And someone had seen it before he could undo it. And he was in trouble. Once I found Bobby, I found out why.
An entire rack of DVD's were frozen solid. Not just the normal light coating of ice that you can snap things out of -- thick 'I haven't defrosted my freezer in a year' frozen.
And the salesperson was staring at both Bobby and the rack in disbelief and growing anger. Ok so it wasn't a good situation. But we could have handled it. Bobby or St John could have melted the ice, we might have had to pay for any damaged DVD's, but we could have resolved the situation just fine.
So of course that's when Logan arrives.
And of course the salesperson doesn't react well to an intimidating looking man glaring at him. So he starts to create a scene. Which attracts the attention of several people, including Jubilee, Kitty, Rogue and Katya.
By then Bobby is trying unsuccessfully to undo his little accident, and instead only making the problem worse. Have I mentioned that when he's nervous or scared his control goes a little ca-ca?
I'm trying unsucessfully to calm Fred (that's who his nametag identified him as) down. Rogue and Kitty, who both have been doing the mediating all afternoon also try to calm him down.
St John has taken over the defrosting duties, which only further freaks out Fred and the surrounding gawkers. Katya quietly slipped through the crowd, and moved to help St John, and a quietly freaking Bobby.
I offered to pay for the damage and pulled out my wallet. Fred took it the wrong way and stepped back, as if he was afraid that I was going to pull a gun on him, and stumbled over an empty box lying on the floor. Rogue stepped forward to steady him, and he violently shrugged her off, accidentally brushing her face with his fingertips.
She jumped back in shocked alarm, he fell unconscious to the floor. No permanent damage, he wasn't touching her long enough for that, he was just unconscious.
Now, I know that Logan is usually more bark than bite. He growls alot, he stalks around the mansion intimidating most people, and he talks a tough game. But usually that is about as rough as he gets outside of the Danger Room or on a mission. There are of course exceptions to this. And someone touching, or hurting Rogue is one of them.
As Rogue jumped back from the by now unconscious Fred, Logan growled loudly -- <SNIKT> -- his claws popped out and suddenly we were in the presence of the Wolverine.
Just what we needed.
Of course the crowd reacted badly and began to yell and throw things at us. A few of the more courageous of the crowd actually tried to get in a few punches; only to be thwarted by Jubliee, who took offense at people hurting her friends, and let fly with a stream of bright fireworks aimed at their feet.
The crowd jumps back in shock. And in keeping with our run of luck, that's when Security arrived, followed by the manager of the store.
Long story short, they threw us out. We are now banned from the store. They even escorted us out of the Mall.
And that is why I'm currently sitting in the gutter with six of my students and seven of my friends. Logan is checking over Rogue, making sure she's alright, and that Fred didn't actually pass any of his oh-so-charming personality on to her. I don't think he did. But I'm glad that she is being taken care of.
Katya and Jubilee are trying to comfort Bobby, who is feeling extremely guilty about starting the whole thing, albeit accidentally.
Kitty and St John are grinning. In a way that makes me extremely nervous. Last time I saw that look, I later found my helmet being used as a bowling ball in an impromtu game of ten pin bowls on the main driveway.
"We tried to tell them." Kitty shrugged.
"They wouldn't listen." St John added.
"Wouldn't listen to what?" Logan growled.
Rogue began to laugh. She gestured to the pile of clothes in Kitty's hands and the DVD in St John's. "Remember paying for those, Fearless Leader?"
I groaned. Everyone else began to laugh. What do they find so funny about this? Now I'm going to have to go back and pay for them.
Or maybe not.
As soon as I stepped foot in the Mall, and burly security guard glared at me and began to stalk in my direction. Sighing I turned around and rejoined the now standing group of current and future X-Men.
"Let's go home."
As we trekked towards the SUV Jubilee, Kitty and Rogue began to sing.
//"It's astounding, time is fleeting
Madness takes it hold.
Well listen closely, not for very much longer,
I've got to, keep control."//
Bobby and St John joined in. By the second line, so had Katya.
//"I remember, doing the Time Warp
dreading those moments when,
The blackness would hit me, and the voice would be calling,
Let's do the Time Warp again."//
I groaned, Logan growled.
The local radio station has a lot to answer for.
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