JEST FOR KIDS 04-02-08
Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old
What do you call a horse that is born on the first day of the fourth
An April Foal. (James Ertner)
What do Unicorns call their father?
Why do some sausages have meat at one end and corn meal at the other?
Because it is hard to make both ends meat.
What did Frankenstein say after his brain transplant?
I think I changed my mind,
What bird never goes to a barber?
A bald eagle
What does a dancer usually drink?
What would happen if pigs could fly?
Bacon would go up.
While stealing from a blood bank, the thief was caught red handed
To many girls the word 'marriage' has a nice ring to it.
A family of skunks was trapped in a thicket, surrounded by a pack of
hungry wolves that were edging even closer. The Mother skunk calmly
instructed her young "Quickly children, let's put our heads together!"
After they obeyed, forming a circle, she continued, "Now, let us spray!"
I misplaced my dictionary. Now I'm at a loss for words.
A band director is one person who is not afraid to face the music.
People who fly look down on people who don't fly.
John had spent a week visiting with his much younger brother, Bill.
Bill had asked to accompanied him to the airport for his flight back
home. After verifying the seat number assigned, John re-joined Bill
and explained he'd have to wait another two hours for maintenance.
"Why do you have to wait?" asked Bill. "My plane's been grounded,"
said John. "Grounded?" Bill said puzzled. "I didn't even know
airplanes had parents!"
Years ago, there was an old tale in the Marine Corps about a
Lieutenant who inspected his Marines and told the "Gunny" that they
smelled bad. The Lieutenant suggested that they change their skivies.
The "Gunny" responded, "Aye, aye, sir. I'll see to it immediately." He
went into the tent and said, "The lieutenant thinks you smell bad and
he wants you to change your skivies. Smith, you change with Jones,
McCarthy, you change with Witkowskie, Brown, you change with
Our manager at the restaurant where I worked was a much beloved,
jovial man. But there was one subject you didn't dare discuss in front
of him -- his height. Or, should I say, his lack of it. One day, he
stormed through the door and announced angrily, "Someone just picked
my pocket!" Most of my fellow waitresses and I were speechless, except
for the one who blurted out, "How could anyone stoop so low?" (Bette
Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!
OLD BAKERS never die, they just stop making lots of dough.
Confucius says... "Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion!"
I used to work in an orange juice factory, until I got canned. Yeah,
they put the squeeze on me, said I couldn't concentrate. You know,
same old boring rind over and over again.
"I'll meet you at the corner," said one wall to the other. (Evan Esar)
In a funeral parlor: "Ask about our layaway plan.
Headline: Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge