I apologize if I sounded whiny and
complaining in my last post. To give you
some background -- I have done a lot of
work forgiving myself when my mind strays
during meditation and other times and I
don't believe I have expectations of any
particular thing happening. I've
deliberately stayed away from reading any
accounts of "what's supposed to happen"
just so I wouldn't fall into a trap of
I was diagnosed with sleep apnea last
fall and it does not seem to be entirely
under control -- I go for another sleep
test in a couple of weeks. So I think a
lot of my frustration and discouragement
is over the fact that it's taking so long
to sort out a lot of health issues. And I
am tired and foggy from lack of sleep.
Anyway, that's kind of where I'm at. As
soon as some breakthrough occurs, I will
let you know.