[Oh Happy Day! It's Positivity Wednesday and we have a special treat. None
other than our hero and a personal friend, "UltraJohn" Price, has (just this
past Thursday) completed a SOLO and UNAIDED Transcontinental Run across the
entire United States from California to Virginia, touching his toes (hell,
full body swim at the finish!) in both oceans--first the Pacific at Venice
Beach and then, some 87 days later, the Atlantic at Virginia Beach. And
then just this past weekend he showed up to run yet another footrace!!
Nothing short of spectacular, huh? It's really and truly why John truly and
really REALLY deserves today's TMIMITW honor. Here. Read all about it
("just the facts, ma'am"):
In a time known to be generally faster than Amtrak takes, he covered the
entire country, from coast to coast, entirely on foot.
By the time he finished, his complete chromosomal balance had been totally
scrambled. Nothing about his being--at the start--was still with him at the
finish. Even his "Gopher" had to be replaced.
His wheeled little mechanical carry-all was called the "Gopher"--not his pet
His new wheeled golf-cart-slash-baby-buggy allowed him to carry a full set
of clubs, and enter and win several major PGA tournaments along the way.
Not only did he speed his way across the country, but he also had the
presence of mind to stop occasionally and write about it...and to take
pictures. His photos were so good and in demand, they eliminated any
further need for paparazzi.
His pictures have been run on the front page of every tabloid in the
country, including on television by TMZ.
Ever the selfless modern-day hero, all monetary proceeds from the sale of
his pics have gone to charity, which is no small donation. Because of his
generosity, cancer, diabetes, and the common cold have all been cured.
Blisters, however, continue still to be a problem plaguing medical science.
But he assures everyone that THAT's next.
He has not only run across the country, but the way in which he got from the
East Coast to the West Coast in the first place was by flying across the
country. He admitted--although privately--that his arms were very tired,
and that's why he reasoned he could rest them by using only his legs on the
He is THE MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD.
"I don't always run or fly alone across America; but when I do, I prefer to
be by myself. Stay flapping, my friends."
( 00 )
See (and hear) some originals:
[and thanks to UltraJohn Price--whom this pale travesty of an honorarium is
now all about--for supplying this in place of that former long and
("an 800-year-old yap-flapper himself, as well as your lute-plucking French
song-and-dance-man whose first cross-country sojourn was at Tierra Del
Yankee Folly of the Day:
Arnold Schwarzenegger had asked John to smuggle his "love child" inside that
baby-buggy and deposit him in Hyannis Port somewhere on the Kennedy
compound, but thankfully our hero refused.