On Thu, 2003-12-04 at 18:02, Michael Helsher wrote:
> Thank you for a very concise post, this part of which really
> speaks to the essence of why I fell in love with the POF. I
> have experienced some of the "trial by fire" you mentioned,
> which started with the writing of my first "searching and
> fearless moral inventory". I went on to ponder what it might
> mean to have my so called "defects of charactor" removed, only
> to find that they get removed by a transformation prosess that
> involved (for me)an excrutating amount of what I can only call
> raw self awareness, where for a time, every little action was
> accompanied by the thought of - "what in God's name am I
> doing?" It was like watching myself playing a part in a stupid
> movie. So here I would guess is what you would call "meeting
> the double".
> This painful process went on until I started to ponder what it
> might mean to really "make ammends" for all the stupid stuff
> that I had done. When this ammends process actually started to
> happen for me, I experienced the first glimps of a working
> inner reality present within myself. Next came the process of
> taking a daily inventory (which Steiner reccomends). Then came
> the pondering of what it might mean to have "conscious
> contact" with "Knowledge of Gods will, and the power to carry
> it out". This idea brought me from being a God fearing
> athiest, to having reverence for the idea of truth, as I have
> experienced it. I then relapsed back into painful awarness for
> a while until I realized that "carrying the message" didn't
> mean that I had the one-and-only right idea about what the
> truth might be.
> So all this happened and I really did not have a practical way
> of understanding it until I found the POF.
> I used to think that I had a shitty life, and that if only I
> had a time machine... Now a days I wouldn't change a thing
> (well, maybe just one of those really pretty girls that got
> Truth and Love
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Joel Wendt <hermit@...>
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