WOSSNAME -- MARCH 2006 -- PART 4 OF 4 (continued)
7) WINTERSMITH -- ADVANCE PEEK
At 9, Tiffany Aching defeated the cruel Queen of Fairyland.
At 11, she battled an ancient body-stealing evil.
At 13, Tiffany faces a new challenge: a boy. And boys can be
a bit of a problem when you're thirteen.
But the Wintersmith isn't exactly a boy. He is Winter itself --
snow, gales, icicles -- all of it. When he has a crush on Tiffany,
he may make her roses out of ice, but his nature is blizzards
and avalanches. And he wants Tiffany to stay in his gleaming,
frozen world. Forever.
Tiffany Aching is a trainee witch - now working for the seriously
scary Miss Treason. But when Tiffany witnesses the Dark Dance --
the crossover from summer to winter - she does what no one has
ever done before and leaps into the dance, into the oldest story
there ever is, and draws the attention of the Wintersmith himself...
As Tiffany-shaped snowflakes hammer down on the land, can Tiffany
deal with the consequences of her actions? Even with the help of
Granny Weatherwax and the Nac Mac Feegle - the fightin',
thievin' pictsies who are prepared to lay down their lives for their
'big wee hag' ...
It's going to be a cold, cold season, because if Tiffany doesn't
survive until Spring -- Spring won't come.
Publication date: US October 1, 2006, price $16.99
UK September 28, 2006
8) DISCWORLD QUIZ
Discworld Multiple choice quiz ye Seconde
Being a modest selection of Disc-related brain-ticklers and memory-
by Annie Mac and Steven D'Aprano
1. What device or artifact did Tiffany Aching employ to overcome
a) kung fu
c) an 8-inch frying pan
2. Who introduced Cohen the Barbarian to "dine-chewers"?
a) the Chieftain of the Horse People
c) Farrah Fawcett
3. What first tipped Vimes off that Corporal Littlebottom was female?
a) her high-heeled iron boots
b) her sparkly green dress
c) her lipstick
4. In Maskerade, Salzella claimed that all musical instruments are
"incredibly expensive to repair" with one possible exception:
b) MacFeegle mousepipes
c) the spoons
5. The Dwarf in charge of printing The Times was called:
a) Gimlet Grimfodder
b) Gunilla Goodmountain
c) Worsel Gummidge
6. Name three poisons commonly (or snobbishly) used by the Assassins'
a) Mur, Nig and Eniru
b) Darestim, Daturon and Iocaine
c) Bloat, Lord Downey's mint humbugs, and Wasp Agaric
7. The Agateans' deadly explosive device is known as a:
a) Flaming Dragon
b) Screaming Mimi
c) Barking Dog
d) Barbarian Vampire Ghost
8. In "The Seventh Wife of Greenbeard", according to Malicia Grim,
Mrs Greenbeard stabbed her husband in the eye with:
a) an umbrella
b) a frozen herring
c) dangerous beans
9. When Albert was working as a Hogswatch pixie, he called himself:
a) Old Man Trouble
b) Fairy Peaseblossom
c) Uncle Heavy
10. The notice over the Gates of Hell in "Eric" reads:
a) "You don't have to be 'damned' to work here, but it helps!!!"
b) "It's not where you stand, it's which way you face!!!"
c) "Rooms available!!! Apply at desk!!!!!"
11. The Spouter breed of swamp dragon tends to:
a) Piddle reginic acid when excited
b) Explode in the presence of mint
c) Drop its scales at the first sign of danger
d) all of the above
12. What were the most vital ingredients in Mrs Gogol's gumbo?
a) snakes' heads and ladies' fingers
b) parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme
c) dried prawns and gris-gris
9) LIMERICK CONTEST
Alas, our call for limericks seems to have fallen on deaf ears.
Are there no poets among us?
Even I can produce one:
There once was a fellow named Rob
Who they say was a bit of a slob
He married the Kelda
(Who was somewhat his elda)
And got a more lucrative job.
Annie Mac is a limericks dynamo:
Said His Grace, the Duke Samuel Vimes
"We're solving most violent crimes
"I'm glad of the hype
"But I've one major gripe:
"They got my age wrong in The Times!"
Moist Von Lipwig, Postmaster of wiles
Offered stamps in some true-to-life styles
"Quirm Reals" - no misnomer!
Their pungent aroma
Preceded deliv'ry by miles.
Littlebottom, a Dwarf of the Watch
Has raised her race-profile a notch
She excels at deduction
But, if there's a ruction
Gives good Dwarfish kicks to the crotch!
File Rust under "citizens, leading"
He's a man of impeccable breeding
But though he can muster
Rude upper-crust bluster
His true "inner chin" is
The Captain called Carrot's phlegmatic
Dependable; never erratic
Though some think him "slow"
He dupes them, y'know:
There's far more than dust in *his* attic.
A fabulous fellow is Death
He dances without drawing breath
His phizogg's quite fearful
But is he e'er cheerful?
"The anther," says Igor, "ith YETH."
Mistress Ogg is a witchsome old nanna
She's quite good at managing mana
But I sadly must tell:
She's not yet found a spell
To stop spelling banananana.
O, praise the most marvellous Clacks!
Now messages travel in packs
Are prone, though, to errors
When semaphore mangles the facts...
Magrat, stressed-out Highness of Lancre
For simpler times does oft hanker:
No national notions
Just brewing up potions
For folks who remember to thank 'er.
The scrumptious cuisine of Brindisi
Kept Henry Slugg's kitchen staff busy
Though he hates to eat it
We all know his secret -
He's no real Brindisian, is 'e?
I guess we'll just have to hold the contest open until April 25th.
Please send all entries to:
10) YES VIRGINIA, THERE IS A SENIOR WRANGLER
Senior Wrangler: not just an Unseen University position!
by Steven D'Aprano
At the University of Cambridge in the United Kingdom, a wrangler is a
student who has completed the third year (called Part II) of the
Mathematical Tripos with first-class honours.
The highest-scoring student is named the "senior wrangler"; the second
highest-scoring student is the "second wrangler"; the third highest is the
"third wrangler", and so on. Last is (or was) the wooden spoon.
Senior wranglers have included some of Britain's most brilliant
mathematicians and scientists, including John Herschel, George Stokes and
Lord Rayleigh and J. E. Littlewood. John Couch Adams scored so well, that
there was a greater gap between him and the second wrangler than between the
second wrangler and the wooden spoon.
Interestingly, there are some equally if not more famous names associated
with the rank of second wrangler (such as James Clerk Maxwell, J.J. Thomson
and Lord Kelvin). Legend has it that Kelvin was so confident that he had
come top of the exam that he asked his servant to run to the Senate House
and check who the second wrangler was. The servant returned and informed
him, "You, sir!". It is also suggested that the final exam required the
students to write a proof of a theorem (which Kelvin himself had provided
the proof for, earlier in the course); unfortunately, because he had created
it, it hadn't occurred to him to learn it, and he spent a lot of time
working it out from scratch - while the student who achieved Senior Wrangler
put it down to having committed the proof to memory.
The first woman to top the maths list, albeit unofficially, was Philippa
Fawcett, who took the exams in 1890. At the time, women were not officially
ranked, although they were told how they had done compared to the male
candidates, so she was ranked "above the senior wrangler".
Copyright 2006 by Klatchian Foreign Legion
If you did not get all 4 parts, write: jschaum111@...
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