Thank you Melinda for your beautiful honesty.
My mind has also been torturing me for the last few days; not with
anger, but with other things.
I too find that sometimes my mind is so stubborn that it has to be
forced to read Guru's writings as well. I've stopped feeling bad
about it. As long as I do the right thing, what my mind thinks is of
Tonight I had the experience of once again going through mind
torture, and I had to give a class tonight. I struggled to make my
mind quiet and meditate before the class, then I opened up Beyond
Within, and like a fresh breeze, Guru gave the answer that I needed,
and I was able to go and have a wonderful class.
I think the key is to pray for forgiveness past present and future,
and don't be too hard on yourself when the mind rears its ugly head.
Self flagellation only makes it worse. Remember that we are the soul
and not the mind, and it's just that the mind has not been
sufficiently touched by the soul yet, and it will just take time.
Hope you are feeling better, and that everything is finally settled