Dear members, I am trying to help my daughter to find her biological siblings. I am her biological mother. I had a 2 month fling with a man much older than IMessage 1 of 1 , Sep 20, 2008View Source
I am trying to help my daughter to find her biological siblings. I am her biological mother. I had a 2 month "fling" with a man much older than I am. I was young and naive. When I found out I was pregnant, he ended it and offered to pay for an abortion. He, being older had children who were close to my age at the time! I was not aware of the many secrets he had kept from me. The last time I saw him was the night I told him about the pregnancy, and the last time we spoke was when my daughter was 3 months old. I sued for child support and he called to say good luck and have a nice life.
Back then, paternity testing was not being used, so it was impossible to prove he was her father. He was though , as I was seeing nobody but him at that time. So I raised my baby girl without any help from him.
My step mother, who is into geneology, did some research for me and what she did find out was rather shocking. We found out some truth about the man that I thought I knew. She found him through death records in California and found out he had passed away,shortly before my daughter's 18th birthday. She found out he had been married nearly 50 years!
When we were involved, he had a condo in Newport Beach, which is the city I was living in. He had pictures on the wall of his children, a boy and a girl. He told me he was divorced, but I am assuming he must have been separated from his wife at the time.
My daughter started asking about him when she was about 3. I told her as much as I thought a 3 year old could bear. Over the years, she pressed me for more information about him and when she was 16, I finally told her the whole truth as I knew it to be at the time. She was devastated, and I did'nt know if I should have told her the truth.
At the time, I regretted it and wished I could have made up some lie to tell her, something that would have been less shocking than the truth, that her father did not want her.
When we found out about his death, she wanted to find her brother and sister. I could only picture that reunion! Out of the blue a young woman comes into their lives , claiming to be the sister they never knew about! I could not bear the thought of more heartache or rejection for her and discouraged her from it. I thought finding out that her father was dead, would be the closure she needed. But she has tried to find them, but with no success.
That is our story in a nutshell.
What I DO know about her father:
His name was Wilfred Gene Caldwell, he went by "Bill".
He lived in New Port Beach, CA in 1980 and 1981 after those years I do not know where he lived.
He was a patent atttorney, and worked for Rockwell International.
His mother's first name was Pansy.
His wife's name was Gertrude.
I never knew his SSN.
I believe his daughter's name is Jean.
I do not recall his son's name.
He collected mexican pewter.
Liked to sing and play the organ.
He loved fresh seafood.
He was about 5'9" tall.
He had blue eyes.
He was quickly going bald.
He had a stocky frame.
He drove a Datsun 240 Z.
He had a great sense of humor and loved joking around.
He was given pictures of my daughter when she was a newborn and at 2 months old. When we last spoke, he said he had her pictures still.
It is late, I can't call my step mom for the city he died in, but it was in California.
My daughter is now 27 and has a daughter of her own. She still wants closure.
We have been unsuccessful in finding out anything about her siblings.
I just remembered, I believe her brother's name is Craig, but I'm not 100% sure.
I realize the info is sketchy, but maybe someone will read this and it will all come together. For my daughter's sake.
I am now 50 years old, his children would be around that age or a few years younger.
Any help or advise would be appreciated.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.