SCREAM OF THE CROP JOKES & QUOTES
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Quotes:
Just because two people argue,
It doesn't mean they don't love each other.
And just because they don't argue,
It doesn't mean they do love each other.
Either you control your attitude or it controls you.
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You Might be a Leprechaun if.......
Submitted by J, L, CR & TJ Morrison
You snicker uncontrollably all the way through "Darby O'Gill And The Little People."
Your record collection is stocked only with very short artists, Paula Abdul, Sheena Easton, Prince, Phil Collins.
When you see a rainbow, you get a greedy little look in your eye. (Arrrr, there's me pot o' gold!)
In your cupboard there is nothing but Lucky Charms cereal.
Every time you get your paycheck, you convert it into gold coins and bury it somewhere.
You insist on dancing a jig on your way to work each morning to the embarrassment of all your friends.
You've been under a rock for the past few years.
You just despise fairies. ("Wing Envy" if you ask me!)
You try to pick up women by saying "Ah, lassie, you have dazzling kneecaps, you do."
When you eat good food, you say it is "magically delicious."
And the number one way you can tell you might be a Leprechaun:
You're three feet tall, Irish, have red hair, cuss, drink and wear green a lot!
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From Laura:
WINTER BLONDE
As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out
of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door.
The trucker lowers the window, and she says "Hi, my name is Heather
and you are losing some of your load."
The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street.
When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again.
She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door.
Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if they've never spoken, the
blonde says brightly, "Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some
of your load!"
Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street.
At the third red light, the same thing happens again.
All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door. The trucker rolls down the window. Again she says "Hi,
my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"
When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light.
When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs
back to the blonde.
He knocks on her window, and after she lowers it, he says...
"Hi, my name is Mark. It's winter in
SALT TRUCK!"
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