Carolyn Perz,

I've worked briefly at a Catholic school and therefore I took the basic
Virtus training for protecting children from sexual abuse, as required.

I may work again and so I do stay current with the required monthly Virtus
Online training quizzes.

Sexual abuse by people in authority is a real issue and a common issue.
As I learned, one in three people has been sexually abused as a child, one
in seven people is sexually attracted to children, and one in thirty has
sexually abused a child.

However, as a Catholic, I must speak up to say that I feel the Virtus
Online system of one-way online interaction is pathological.

The authority of the church was used to dismiss, discount, ignore, allow,
sanction and even exalt sexual abuse by priests. Now that same authority
is used to steer or ram people into proper thinking.

This is certainly not Christ-like. It is Satan-like.

Our Church needs to be accountable to God. We need to speak to each other
about all matters of faith and life. I have no such two-way public forum
in Our Church for engaging others, whether lay or clergy.

Instead, the weight of the Church and of the Economy and of Psychology is
combined to force me to consent to this one-way assault. It's like being
forced to watch television.

Our Church reveres Mary, mother of Jesus, who was presumably engaged at
the age of twelve, as was the norm in those days, and shortly thereafter
impregnated, not by her wish but with her consent. In what sense is she
the model for Catholic sexuality?

Or when David and Johnathan kiss passionately in the Old Testament, what
was the scope of that passion? and how old where they?

Or where are the positive role models today of attachment, intimacy, arousal?

I suppose that the strangest aspect of "Virtus Online" is that it is
written as if for "normal" people. But the statistics show that there
aren't any such people!

Of course, there's no practical discussion within Our Church of what to do
if you have inappropriate feelings or others have them for you.

"Virtus Online" is a symptom of the inability of Our Church to have
healthy community. It's going to teach us through a plate glass window.
And it's not interested to learn. It's a sick church.

Thank you for posting your email...

I write my letter so that in good conscience I could continue to
participate in this charade and be qualified for employment as it may
arise.

I expect that my writing such a letter would be first of all taken as a
warning sign that there is something wrong with me.

I suppose that Virtus Online may be effective in protecting children from
sexual abuse. I report to you how it affects me. Much of my feeling
comes from the lack of positive space in Our Church.

I share my letter with my online group, "Living By Truth"
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/livingbytruth/

Andrius

Andrius Kulikauskas
ms@...
(773) 306-3807
http://www.selflearners.net