in this issue
Who to Avoid at a Christmas or New Year's Party
12 Signs at the Christmas Party
Why Santa Clause
Ganesh, the Celestial Leader
Guru Tattva Yoga


Happy Winter Solstice. Yuletide Greetings. Happy Chanukah. Happy Kwanzaa, Merry
Christmas, Happy New Year! I wish you great blessings and fulfillment in 2012.

I offer you this newsletter to enhance and deepen your experience of Vedic
Astrology. In these newsletters, expect to find a combination of helpful
articles, book reviews, Jyotish links and more. The purpose of this newsletter
is to educate and titillate the Jyotish-loving public. The opinions given within
are solely those of the author.

In this issue, Jyotishi Alison Berker and I lighten the mood with three humorous
astrological articles for the holidays. Andrea Pflaumer offer a major article on
the elephant-headed Ganesh, and Alison Berker discusses the Guru Tattva Yoga.

Please visit my website, www.Jyotish.ws at your convenience. The best articles
from these newsletters are archived on this site. I offer access to an excellent
yagya program.

- Michael Laughrin (michael@...)

Who to Avoid at a Christmas or New Year's Party
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Michael Laughrin (michael@...)

This is a humorous, short guide that should help the reader avoid boredom, anger
and potential flare-ups at parties this Holiday season.

I am assuming that you, dear reader, know your own Jyotish chart. If so, then
you will know that certain signs are anathema to you and you want to avoid those
unfortunate individuals who have malefics in that sign and/or other terrible
afflictions to that sign or its ruler.

Afflicted sign and how the potential "disaster" person may act:
1. Aries - turns red in the face and looks of anger, depression and fear
alternate on the face of one with a severely afflicted Aries. Give this person
sweets! Or, better yet, just avoid him altogether.
2. Taurus - laughs too loud, keeps glancing lustfully at the buffet table. Stay
away from the beastie when it is eating.
3. Gemini - engages in 100-word long run-on sentences. Bad case of extreme motor
mouth. Cannot sit still. This creature is a tremendous danger on the dance floor
due to its unnatural twitching, shaking, and spasms. No, do not call 911.
4. Cancer is especially dangerous in its afflicted female form. She will want to
mother you to death - whether you are male or female - and will psychically grok
onto you like a small jellyfish.
5. Leo -There is a strong chance that you will fall asleep listening to this
loser talk about himself/herself. The only cure for an afflicted Leo person is
to utterly and entirely ignore them! They thrive on unneeded attention. Don't
give it to them.
6. Virgo's talk of gardening may make you feel like a weed. The antidote for
their sappy talk is to tell them an extremely off-color and obnoxious joke. This
will make them angry and they will march away, leaving you alone to enjoy the
party.
7. Libras want to share - to communicate - to be together. Arrange for your
significant other to call you after three minutes in the company of this
non-entity. Or, better yet, set the alarm on your cell phone to go off at the
touch of a button. "Oh, gotta go, important call to make. Big client. Bye."
8. Scorpios give special meaning to the phrase passive/aggressive. Their eyes
burn with the fires of their hidden evil plans. Shower them with love and
extra-toothy grins and they will get bored and look for someone else to resent
and argue with.
9. Sagittarius' will want to move, move and move. Therefore, the cure is to
feign exhaustion and just sit down and close your eyes. Pretend that you are
either asleep or are in a deep meditation and they will bop away and try to
"move" somebody else.
10. Capricorn's doom and gloom and dull clothing and dull talk will depress any
normal soul. Jump up and down, talk a mile a minute (but do not try to be
logical). Act like you are on drugs and the Capricorn and his dark cloud will
try to rain on somebody else's parade.
11. Aquarius tries to impress you with how smart they are and what a deep
thinker they are. Talk about your obsession with buttons or tomatoes or wines or
tobacco and they will give up, thinking you too shallow to bother with.
12. Pisces will talk about the vibrations and the essences and the psychic this
and the ethereal that. Tell them about your investments or the mechanical
innards of your vehicle or the latest stock car race you watched on TV. Do not
discuss mantras, meditation, or anything New Age. Be earthy and practical and
they will float away to the next victim.
Hopefully this little guide will help you survive the holidays intact without
any neurotic new "friends."


12 Signs at the Christmas Party
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Michael Laughrin (michael@...)


Office holiday parties can bring out the best -- and the worst -- in your
co-workers. With this humorous list, you can identify the twelve signs at your
office holiday party:
• Bragging about all her great successes. --> Leo.
• Tasting everything and saying, "This is the best ---- I ever ate." --> Taurus.
• "Can't stay. Gotta go. Two more parties to go to." --> Sagittarius.
• "Tell me all your problems." --> Cancer.
• Tries to tell a joke in Klingonese. --> Aquarius.
• Cold, surly and wears dark colors. --> Capricorn.
• Pushy, arrogant and constantly picking fights with different people. -->
Aries.
• Jabbering away in three languages and sometimes speaking all three in one
sentence. --> Gemini.
• Youthful, quiet, with alluring big eyes. --> Virgo.
• Fits in like a chameleon with whatever group he's with. --> Libra.
• "Oh, the vibrations are too much. I've got to get out of here." --> Pisces.
• Exercising maximum sex appeal with a strong undertone of danger. --> Scorpio.

Cheers!


Why Santa Clause Is:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Alison Berker (premavratini@...)

Why Santa Claus is an:

Aries - He wears red. He has a super fast vehicle and he doesn't wear a helmet.
Taurus - He's fat. He loves milk and cookies.
Gemini - He is playful. He loves toys.
Cancer - He stays at home 364 days a year.
Leo - He is the boss.
Virgo - He is extremely organized.
Libra - He keeps tabs on who is naughty and who is nice.
Scorpio - No one has ever seen him or been to his house.
Sagittarius - He accomplishes the impossible.
Capricorn - He is never broke.
Aquarius - He gives to everyone regardless of race, caste or creed.
Pisces - He is a totally impractical visionary.


Ganesh, the Celestial Leader
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Andrea Pflaumer (www.andreapflaumer.com)

In yoga studios worldwide, would-be yogis and yoginis chant kirtans to Him. In
the West, His image is seen on everything from t-shirts to bumper stickers. But
Shri Ganesh, the benevolent elephant-headed god with the pudgy man/child body is
much more than the happy-go-lucky deity invoked for good luck and removal of
obstacles along life's path. Ganesh is considered the Gatekeeper to the Vedas.

Ganesh gained this status after engaging in a race with His brother, Murugan, to
see which could circumambulate the universe fastest. Murugan dashed forth,
leaving the pudgy Ganesh behind. But Ganesh won the race by simply circling His
parents, Shiva and Parvati, the source of the entire universe, three times. As
with many of the Ganesh tales, this one demonstrates why He is invoked at the
start of any endeavor, i.e., if one wants success, he must acknowledge the
highest value first.

There never was a religion identified as 'Hinduism' until the British Raj
determined that the beliefs and practices of the Hindu people - gleaned from
millennia of collective wisdom, rather than from a single sage - constituted a
religion. In fact, the Hindu people clearly recognize only one transcendent God
from which all creation emanates. They simply identify their myriad devatas -
major and minor deities - as embodiments of individual qualities and attributes
who instruct or offer assistance to those seeking knowledge and a moral life.

Additionally, religious scholars explain that in both the East and West - from
the Greek Dionysian cults to the monotheistic religions - these same 'beings'
exist under another name: 'angels.' In several traditions angels represent the
male and female counterpart of similar principles to those of the devas. Because
Ganesh's parents, Shiva and Parvati, represent the male and female power in the
universe that brings forth all of the Creation, it's no wonder then that Ganesh,
is considered the leader of all the celestial beings.

If, as the Bible states, we are made in the image of God, there is one very
striking similarity between the image of Ganesh and our human body. As noted by
neuroscientist Dr. Tony Nader (now known as Raja Raam, and author of Human
Physiology, Expression of Veda and the Vedic Literature), the lobes, brainstem
and spinal cord of the human body bear a remarkable resemblance to Ganesh's ears
and trunk

He is the most beloved and frequently invoked of the Hindu pantheon, and His
worship unites all sub sects throughout Indian culture. Among His many qualities
and appellations He is known as the Remover of Obstacles, although He will also
hold back a devotee if the time is not auspicious or the devotee is not yet
'ripe' for fulfillment of a request. He is also called the protector of women,
the Lord of meditation and the protector of the weak.

He associated with the mystic symbol OM or AUM, the primordial sound used at the
beginning and end of meditation, which is why He is invoked at the beginning of
any new endeavor. Hindu children are taught a prayer to Ganesh, the source of
all knowledge, before learning any subject, and He is also associated with the
first word, Vaak, the sound whispered in the ear of a newborn to ensure the
child will be endowed with sweet speech. Astrologically, as the chief God for
Knowledge and Wisdom He is the overlord of the planet Ketu, known as the first
planet, which some say is the most powerful planet among the all the nine
planets as Ketu governs wisdom and liberation.

Although known as a folk deity worshiped by and recognized in sects throughout
India as early as 1200 BC, the image by which we know Him did not become widely
evident until the fourth century A.D. when story of His birth first appeared in
the Puranic literature. That story varies depending upon the oral history of
each culture that tells it, but they share some common themes. In one tale,
Parvati greatly desired a child, but Shiva wanted no part of the householder
life. Distraught, she pulled a thread from her dress and from it fashioned a
child. Shiva proclaimed such a flimsy birth inauspicious, at which the child's
head fell off, leaving Parvati grief-stricken. A voice from the heavens told
them to find someone whose head was facing north (a recurring theme from all the
Ganesh origin tales) and Nandi, Shiva's bull, discovered Indra's elephant,
Airavata, lying with his head facing north. The bull cut it off, Indra attempted
to stop him and in the process cut off one of His tusks, but Nandi persisted,
and the head was brought to Shiva, who placed it on the child. Ganesh was
restored and His re-birth declared auspicious.

In another tale, Parvati desires privacy at her bath and so constructs Ganesh
out of a combination of the dirt on her body and perfume, and asks Him to guard
the entrance to her chamber. When Shiva approaches Parvati's chamber, Ganesh
refuses him entrance at which Shiva chops off His head. Here again, to assuage
Parvati's grief he sets his ganas - the hordes of ghosts and ghouls who
accompany him -- out to find the first being whose head is facing north, which
is an elephant. In yet another Puranic tale, He was created by Shiva at the
request of the minor devas to protect them against the demons. Parvati, besotted
with the beautiful child, drew Him to her lap and declared that no endeavor
would be successful unless Ganesh was honored.

In many Eastern countries, all elephants are thought to represent Ganesh. By
analyzing the qualities represented by the elephant and identifying some of the
many tools and objects Ganesh holds or that are associated with Him, we can
better understand why He is considered the gatekeeper to higher knowledge. An
elephant can trample anything in its path but its efficient and flexible trunk
can pick up even the tiniest object. It can be slow, graceful and elegant or
rapid and fierce. Its large ears imply the ability to hear everything and its
small eyes imply concentration and focus. His large stomach digests all - the
good and the bad - of life. His conch summons all to come and pray, and His goad
prods the slothful. He holds one of His four hands in the pose of blessing to
protect those on the spiritual path. His ax and other weapons cut away whatever
harm might lie ahead and whatever wrongs might engulf the mind. A plate of
laddus near Him invokes the rewards of living a wise life. The lotus flower
represents beauty arising from the mud below. His conveyance is the lowliest of
creatures, the rat who can carry Him into the smallest of places and whose
senses (and ours) are kept under Ganesh's control.

One of the most provocative images of Ganesh is that at the feet of Veda Vyasa,
using His broken tusk to write (one story says He broke it off to use as His
pen) the world's longest epic, the Mahabharata. Under the advice of Brahma,
Vyasa asked Ganesh to be his scribe under the condition that He understood every
thought and word completely before writing it down. Thus, even the telling of
the story offers the wisdom that the Mahabharata should be listened to and
understood slowly, to absorb and digest the full meaning.

There are numerous mantras associated with Ganesh, each calling forth a
different attribute which the invoker desires to propitiate. Although all mantra
meditation requires some formal initiation it is particularly important when
practicing a Ganesh mantra as these mantras are for developing specific siddhis
or powers, and must not be invoked lightly or taken for granted.

Finally, one of the most charming and instructive tales about Him involves
Ganesh Chuthurti, the celebration beginning on the fourth day of the waxing
moon, usually between mid-August and the end of? September, when Ganesh makes
Himself available for all His devotees. The story is told that Ganesh rode His
mouse to Chandra loka during the full moon but the mouse was frightened by a
snake and bolted, tumbling Ganesh , at which the Moon burst out laughing. Ganesh
became furious and pronounced a curse: ". . Because of your pride, no one may
look at your face on Ganesh Chathurthi lest he be falsely implicated in slander
and will lose his good name." Shattered, the Moon became humble, asking for
forgivenenss: "Forgive me in my ignorance - please take back the curse," but
Ganesh explained that once a curse is given it cannot be taken back. However,
what was important was the destruction of the Moon's pride and as he had
realized his fault - all those who are subjected to false accusations and lose
their good name will be restored if they listen to this story. The Moon thanked
Him humbly and Ganesh left Moon loka.

And this perhaps is the most significant teaching of the Ganesh tales: that He
will bless our endeavors and grant our requests if we first ask with
thoughtfulness, humility and obeisance. Jai Ganesh!


Guru Tattva Yoga
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Alison Berker (premavratini@...)

Guru means, among other things, teacher. Some texts state that "gu" means
"darkness" and "ru" means "light," making the "guru" the "dispeller of
darkness," darkness being spiritual ignorance. A tattva is a pervasive essence
or element. In the West, people are most familiar with the term "tattva" in its
application to the pancha mahabhutas or five elements - space, air, fire, water
and earth - tattva representing a state of limited being, not a particular
thing. For example, fire includes all metabolic processes and other processes of
transformation. However, the pancha tattva are only the densest of the tattvas.
Advaita Vedanta describes 25 tattvas and Kashmir Shaivism describes 36.

From densest to subtlest these are:

Pancha mahabhutas: Five Great Elements

prithvi - earth
jala - water
tejas - fire
vaayu - wind
aakaasha - ether

Pancha tanmaatras - Five Subtle Elements

gandha - smell
rasa - taste
ruupa - form
sparsha - touch
shabda - sound

Pancha karmendriyas - Five Organs of Action

upastha - creative
paayu - elimination
paada - foot
paani - hand
vaak - speech

Pancha jnaanendriyas - Five Organs of Cognition

ghraana - nose, organ of smelling
rasanaa - tongue, organ of tasting
cakshu - eye, organ of seeing
tvak - skin, organ of touching
shrotra - ear, organ of hearing

Antahkaranas - Three Inner Instruments

manas - emotional mind
buddhi - intellect
ahamkaara - ego connected with objectivity

prakriti - nature
purusha - ego connected with subjectivity

In Advaita Vedanta, the tattvas end at purusha. Kashmir Shaivism describes 11
more. They are:

Sat kancukas - Six Coverings

niyati - limitation of place
kaala - limitation of time
raaga - limitation of attachment
vidyaa - limitation of knowledge
kalaa - limitation of creativity
maayaa - limitation of individuality

Shuddha tattvas - Pure Elements

shuddha vidya - Iness in Iness, Thisness in Thisness
iishvara - Thisness in Iness
sadaashiva - Iness in Thisness
shakti - Iness
shiva - Being

There are some philosophical differences between Advaita Vedanta and Kashmir
Shaivism which the enunciation of additional tattvas help to illuminate, but
their differences are not the focus of this writing. I am only listing the
tattvas to help the reader grasp the concept. Kashmir Shaivism does not take its
list of tattvas as absolute, emphasizing that tattvas can be further enunciated
or shrunk. Rather, they are a meditational tool for understanding the manifest.
They can be shrunk to as little as three, Shiva - the Absolute, Nara(man) -
Duality, Shakti - the fulcrum between duality and non-duality.

A tattva can be understood as an essential element of the manifest universe. The
guru tattva could best be described as the tendency of God to Self-liberate.
Just as the manifest universe becomes more dense as it comes into being, ending
with earth, the densest state of matter, there is an opposite tendency as well,
the tendency of that which has been separated to rise and return. The guru
tattva is everything that encourages this process of rising and returning to
God. It reaches its pinnacle in the Sat Guru - the being who will grant you
"final liberation." However, before you meet the Sat Guru, you will meet many
gurus who are useful on the path to ultimate liberation.

In Kali Yuga in the West, much confusion persists over what the nature of, and
relationship to, guru ought to be. People yearn to do the right thing and go by
proper procedure, but under-informed in the philosophies, the texts and the
mores of the culture to which they are appealing, they go astray willy nilly.
They are convinced they need to locate their sat guru before they have even
learned to sit in a proper meditational asana for the needed length of time, or
they abjectly surrender to the first person labeled "guru" that comes along and
then blindly closing their eyes to any further information that might be helpful
in advancing them spiritually. Fortunately, God is able to use even these
mistakes to encourage the process of liberation in sincere individuals, although
it doesn't usually end looking anything like the imagination declares it to look
like.

A further investigation reveals several things about guru. While it is declared
that a guru is absolutely essential along the path, what form or forms guru
takes will vary from person to person. If a person is desirous of liberation and
unable to locate a guru, one very valuable suggestion is to take Lord Shiva as
one's Guru and then trust that whatever shows up is an emanation of Him. Lord
Shiva is the Adi-Guru, the root guru of all gurus. If you self-initiate in this
way and sincerely envisages whoever shows up as an emanation of Lord Shiva, you
are very likely to be protected even if the being that shows up still has
substantial limitations. Those very limitations may, in fact, inform and aid
your enlightenment process.

Gurus can come in many forms. Dattatreya, the father of Aghora, who was supposed
to be a triple incarnation of Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva had 24 gurus, none of
whom even knew that they functioned as his guru. Just so, a person may receive
spiritual help and guidance from many different beings. Sincerity is all that is
required and God will locate the ways and means for transcendence to take place.
A guru may come to teach you for a while and then be on its way, or you may be
on your way. As one of my teachers used to say, "You don't need to defecate in
the living room to have a reason to get up and go to the kitchen." Your further
evolution may take you away from a guru that helped you. Nonetheless, you can
remain grateful even if their limitations drove you away.

It is not necessary to get in a big entanglement over loyalty issues, because
everything proceeds from the One and returns to it. It is true that at a certain
point on the path, it may become necessary to limit incoming data since it may
only confuse the dedicated mind, but this should be after adequate understanding
is obtained, not before. Otherwise, one runs the risk of developing a needless
fanaticism and of propagating a dogmatic conviction that may be very limiting
for other beings. In general, any system that is unwilling to embrace the
validity of other systems, is probably limited. As the saying goes, "It takes
one to know one."

In the final analysis, surrendering to guru is absolutely essential in order to
achieve liberation, because how can you let go of you? Like Chinese handcuffs,
in which the process of trying to extricate yourself binds you more tightly in
the handcuffs, there comes a point on the spiritual path where all effort
amounts to a further exercise in Chinese handcuffs and surrender is essential.
However, such surrender will only work when it is appropriate. Such a surrender
is both monumental and utterly natural and arrangement for its occurrence will
be handled by Nature in the due course of time. In the meantime, in the words of
Teddy Roosevelt, "do what you can with what you have where you are." It is sure
to be enough.

Relationship to guru can be analyzed by looking at the ninth house and lord, the
fifth house and lord (ninth from the ninth) and Jupiter, although you may have
to do a broader analysis of the chart to determine whether there is enough
spiritual inclination for the person to have an active path.
Here are some examples.

See the charts below or visit:
http://jyotish.ws/materials/chartad.html

Anandamayi Ma
Anandamayi Ma was born illumined. She was conscious of, and had accurate recall
of, her entire life even her birth and infancy. She was prone to falling into
trance states. In her twenties, she gave her own self mantra diksha and repeated
the mantra. She also went through a period of self directed sadhana that lasted
a couple of years. She described it as jnana masquerading as ajnana - one day it
came to her what it would be like to be a sadhaka and she began to perform
sadhana. Her lagna lord is Jupiter who is exalted in the fifth house suggesting
her ability to function as her own guru. Her ninth lord Mars is in the twelfth
house with Rahu indicating how unconventional she was. It is unconventional to
self-initiate but also she initiated female devotees into the Gayatri mantra and
into the sacred thread ceremony amongst many other unconventional acts. Victory
to the Saint, Anandamayi Ma

Swami Niranjan - Bihar School of Yoga
Swami Niranjan, who inherited the Bihar School of Yoga from his guru, Swami
Satyananda, demanded that his parents take him to the ashram when he was four
years old, where he has lived ever since, except for traveling to teach. His
ninth lord is Sun, in the third, aspecting back into the ninth which contains
the full moon. Jupiter is in the lagna in its own sign with Saturn, Venus and
Mars forming a pravrajya yoga. His entire life so far has been spent with his
guru.

Professor KN Rao
KN Rao is a very famous Indian astrologer. He took formal initiation with a
guru. He also had a jyotish guru and was privileged to meet many very great
yogis in India. His ninth lord is Mercury exalted in the 12th with Ketu and the
Sun. This is a very good spiritual combination. His Jupiter is exalted in the
tenth as well. Because both the ninth lord and Jupiter are exalted, he has had
many tremendously good experiences with the yogis of India.

---------------------------
Website: http://www.Jyotish.ws

Michael Laughrin - Michael@...

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