I wish to preface this essay with a statement that I have many theosophical leanings toward both pagan and Gnostic I know there are many people so stung by Christian hypocrisy that any mention of the words; Christian, Bible, faith, or even God is enough to drive you away. Please bear with me. Gnostic Christian beliefs vary wildly from accepted doctrine. It is a faith I now believe J.K. shares. I will include links to further sources of information where needed.

    For any Christians who find my views blasphemous and wish to flame me for it? Flame away, but I will flame back threefold *evil delighted grin*. This is not directed at all Christians, only those self-righteous ones who are terrified of new ideas and wish to completely silence them. If you think that that isn't you, it probably isn't.

   "You will become the apostle cursed by all others, Judas, you will sacrifice this body of man which clothes me."

    ---From the Gospel of Judas


    Severus asks, "And my soul, Dumbledore, mine?"

    Dumbledore replies, "You alone know whether it will harm your soul to help an old man avoid pain and humiliation…"

    ---From Deathly Hallows

    The figure of Severus Snape has a called a large and rabidly devoted following all is own. Go and look and you will find countless resources on and offline for those who adore Snape. You will also find that in the wake of "Deathly Hallows" there is a ton of outraged grief being expressed over Snape's tragic end in the book.

    I was one of the louder proponents of that outrage myself… at first. Then I *got* it.

    Most of those who rage over Severus's treatment in DH, believe J.K. hated Snape as a character and treated him like refuse. Killing him swiftly and without warning and leaving him there on the floor of the shack.

    I had my own inner Snape to deal with, and I raged and grieved with the angriest of them.

    Then one night the truth of what she has done with Snape's journey hit me full force.

    There have always been people whose lives have been decidedly harder than other. People whose earliest experiences of the world are fraught with suffering, betrayal, and loss. This is the path of Gnostic Judas and of Job. It is not a path given to those despised by God, but to those he has the greatest confidence in.

   "When I looked for good, then evil came unto me: and when I waited for light, there came darkness.

    My bowels boiled, and rested not: the days of affliction prevented me.

    I went mourning without the sun: I stood up, and I cried in the congregation.

    I am a brother to dragons, and a companion to owls.

    My skin is black upon me, and my bones are burned with heat.

    My harp also is turned to mourning, and my organ into the voice of them that weep

    ---Book of Job chapter 30 verses 26-31

    If your life has been/is full of pain. If you have little reason or inclination to love or trust anyone. If you delicate heart has been shattered again and again, it does NOT mean God hates you, the fates aren't picking on you, you are NOT the butt of a cruel cosmic joke! And I'll tell you why.

    In the bible Job is in the end redeemed and given the highest rewards directly from God's hand. This comes about because Job in spite of his extreme suffering maintains his faith in himself and in God. The great tragedy of the prince's tale is not that Dumbledore didn't trust Snape, but that Snape didn't trust himself. Misery is the crucible in which the strongest most blessed and powerful souls are forged, or as in the sad case of Severus lost forever.

    Jo could have shown us a version of Snape where he does have faith, is redeemed and lives on to become a great spiritual teacher.

    So why didn't she give us that example?

    I believe she did so deliberately. Those of us with Snapely dispositions are notoriously hard to reach. By striking Severus down she has struck us as well, hard! She has hurt us deeply and made us angry. Why would she wish to do such a thing? Because those who are angry and hurt tend to ACT. What action might she be anticipating? For us to do what Snape could not. You see those of us who life has most wounded we see Snape as ourselves. When we love him we learn to love ourselves. When we grieve for him we feel the darkness that surrounds us deeply and turn from it searching for light.

    Who better understands the true nature of evil than those of us who have experienced it first hand? Cruelty, indifference, neglect, intolerance and hate… These are the Voldemort's of our world. I believe that those who have suffered these thing the most are the chose warriors destined to fight them. Snape succeeds brilliantly in this, sacrificing himself so that Voldemort may finally be destroyed. He only fails in trusting himself, in his own goodness and forgiving himself for his misguidedness and past confusion. Even some of the words and actions that people cite as proof of Snape's evil are actually proof of his good heart.

     "How extraordinarily like your father you are, Potter," Snape said suddenly, his eyes glinting. "He too was exceedingly arrogant. A small amount of talent on the Quidditch field made him think he was a cut above the rest of us too. Strutting around the place with his friends and admirers ... The resemblance between you is uncanny."
    ---From Prisoner of Azkaban

    He continually challenges Harry, on being arrogant, sneaky, and for lying. This is presented in the books as meanly as possible so that we will at first overlook his true intent. To make Harry think, weigh his actions more carefully, and become a better person. Often he is quite right in his challenges, in spite of being denied tons of information by people around him. In the instances where is is absolutely in the wrong regarding Harry it stems from his inability to forgive James and let go of the past. To forgive James, he would have to understand that James was just a kid, with little life experience or empathy to guide during the time that he was being suck a jerk. Why can't he grasp this simple truth? Because in doing so he would also have to accept that he was only a boy similarly lacking in wisdom when he joined the death eaters and sealed his own and Lily's fate. He cannot believe he deserves forgiveness, and so cannot give it to anyone else.

    Jo's challenge to us, is to open our eyes and embrace the good in ourselves, trust our instincts and fight for what we believe is right. To forgive those who have wronged us, and try to understand them. To see the darkness in ourselves, but instead of condemning it and calling ourselves weak, broken and unworthy to forgive there too. We should acknowledge our mistakes, lest we repeat them. There is no use in sticking there and wallowing in them.  As long as we do so we fail to become all that we might be. There will always be people who call us warped for our unique views, people who think us bleeding hearts for sticking up for others, and even call us indecisive wamblers for reconsidering and agreeing with an opposing viewpoint. So what? Let em taunt and laugh. If we start standing up for ourselves and each other in numbers... What might the world be then? Snape was more than equal to the loathing of others, it was his own loathing of himself that defeated him. We're meant to see this, meant to be outraged, and meant to avoid the same mistake. If only Snape could have saved Snape...Then only you can save you.