A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to...
She was so blonde... She tried to drown a fish. http://jokesfunny.wordpress.com/ She was so blonde... If you gave her a penny for intelligence, you'd get...
 YOU CAT LOVERS ARE GONNA LOVE THIS ONE!!!!!!  ________________________________  ...   FREE  KITTENS   My friend's cat had kittens, and she...
Buford bought a deodorant stick today. He'd never used one before, so he read the instructions. They said  'Remove top and slowly push up bottom' ...
1 Sardar: I hav'nt slept all nite in the train. Friend: Y? Sardar: Got upper berth. Friend: Y did'nt u Xchnged? Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 Xchng in the...
.......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... George Bush in a School George Bush goes to a primary school to give a speech. After his talk he...
# Women especially love a bargain. The question of 'need' is irrelevant, so don't bother pointing it out. Anything on sale is fair game. # Women never have...
If Men Got Pregnant http://home.att.net/~quotations/funny.html Maternity leave would last two years....with full pay. There would be a cure for stretch marks. ...
A man being mugged by two thugs put up a tremendous fight! Finally, the thugs subdued him and took his wallet. Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the...
A man has been banned from getting drunk anywhere in England and Wales for the next seven years after a string of drunk and disorderly offences. David Peers,...
The following is an ad from a real-life newspaper which appeared four days in a row - the last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day's mistake. ...
Two Men and Two Fish, actually. "Two men were in a restaurant and ordered fish. The waiter brought a dish with two fish, one larger than the other. One of the...
An engineer, a physicist, a mathematician, and a mystic were asked to name the greatest invention of all times. The engineer chose fire, which gave humanity...
Here's one that's been going around the 'net for some time but hey ... it still makes for thought provoking stuff. At least it looks to me like she, ...
A man is meeting a friend at a bar? When entering the bar he noticed two women sitting at the bar and one looked his was and said "nine" to her friend. ...
Funny Jokes http://www.lifestorywriting.com/ Driving Through Texas Two guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The...
THE ORIGINAL VERSION: If you love something, Set it free... If it comes back, it's yours, If it doesn't, it never was yours.... THE PESSIMIST VERSION: If you...
A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of...
ROMEO AND JULIET Net Txt Version ... Login: Romeo : R u awake? Want 2 chat? Juliet: O Rom. Where4 art thou? Romeo: Outside yr window. Juliet: Stalker! Romeo:...
The following are new Error Messages planned for Windows Vista: <h2><a href="http://jokeoftheday.wordpress.com/" title="Funny Joke">Funny Joke</a></h2> 1)...
Dad at the Mall I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 92). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was...
A scruffy young man was questioned by one of New York's finest for peddling dirty pictures. "But you're mistaken," said the kid. "These pictures aren't dirty."...
