There was this man in a bar, who ordered 5 glasses of rum. He drank them out quite quickly and then he ordered 4 glasses. After swallowing these, he wanted 3...
A fellow came into a bar and ordered a martini. Before drinking it, he removed the olive and carefully put it into a glass jar. Then he ordered another martini...
My Wife sez I drink too much. In reality though it really only takes one drink to get me totally plastered. It's either the fifteenth one or the sixteenth one,...
A policeman calmly interrupted a wayward drunk trying to get his door keys to fit into the street lamp. "I guess no one's home", said the policeman. The drunk...
Our Twelfth Step--carrying the message--is the basic service that the A.A. Fellowship gives; this is our principal aim and the main reason for our existence. ...
A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are...
One day a drunk walked into a bar and ordered a gin and tonic. He drank half of it and poured the rest on the bartender. The bartender got angry, grabbed the...
What unites alcoholics, what makes it possible for one alcoholic to learn from another, is that the foundation we share is not a strength but a weakness; each...
An inebriated lady got on the double-decker bus in England and sat in the bottom deck close to the driver. She started rambling on and on, so the driver...
A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I bet you fifty dollars that I can bite my right eye." The bartender says, "Yeah, right. I've never seen...
Chuck: "What in the world makes your tongue so black?" Chick: "I once dropped a bottle of whisky on a freshly tarred road." A.S.A.P. Always Say A Prayer...
A cowboy walks into a bar in Texas, orders three mugs of beer and sits in the back room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he...
A drunk ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces." A.S.A.P. Always Say A...
Open meetings are for anyone with an interest in alcoholism; closed meetings are limited to those who have a problem with alcohol. A.S.A.P. Always Say A Prayer...
A fellow with a bit to much to drink entered a florist shop and asked for most beautiful and best bouquet to go with a lame excuse. A.S.A.P. Always Say A...
A few A.A. members were tying up the meeting by talking so long. A voice in back of room said, "If I don't get to share can I get my money back." A.S.A.P. ...
One of my favorite slogans,thanks ..If you feel comfortable tell us about yourself where do you live (City) how you came to AA whats it like today.....its...
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