Have you ever gotten ready for work and forgot whether you put on your
deodorant? There are many things we do automatically--like personal grooming
when getting ready for work; many aspects of driving; preparing meals; the list
goes on and on.
One of the things we do automatically is "self-talk." That's when you see
something you'd like to purchase and part of you says something like, "you can't
afford that;" or, it says, "If you put that on the credit card, you won't have
to pay for it all at once." Never mind that the credit card is nearly maxed out
and you'll pay more for the item in the long run.
All that self-talk is the ego which is trying hard to keep you in its comfort
zone. For the majority of people, it is most comfortable staying in a mediocre
space. It generally wants you to be much like everyone else--hanging in the rat
race, busting butt to get nowhere. At least, for most of us, that is what the
ego has been taught to do.
But, what if you could change that self-talk? What if you could change your life
to allow everything that you desire? Would you do it?
Right about now, your ego is saying something. Is it, "Yeah, right, like that
will ever happen," or, something similar?
Let me suggest something really radical. Your ego likes to be in control. It
likes to tell you that if you don't struggle for everything in your life it's
not worth having. These are things it's been taught since you were a child.
Family, friends, teachers, siblings and co-workers have re-enforced this view
because that's what they were taught.
Now, what if you took control of some of the self-talk and had a chat with your
ego? Just imagine if you could talk your ego into supporting your desire for
change! What couldn't you do?
Remember that your ego is "human," so the trick to enlisting its help is to list
the benefits of changing.
For instance, say you want to change your thinking about having abundance in
your life, but you don't want to work 60+ hours a week to do it. Talk to your
ego. Tell it all the benefits working less, but making more would have.
Things like less stress, more time for healthy pursuits, more time with your
family...there are lots of benefits you should be able to come up with. Write a
list of them that pertain to your situation, then, "discuss" them with your ego.
In the recent past, affirmations were a large self-help thing. The problems was,
if your ego wasn't engaged in what you were affirming, nothing changed.
Instead of saying affirmations your ego is against, develop affirmations with
your ego that it can get behind. Discuss the best affirmations for you and
you'll find that when you can come into agreement, your affirmations will work
much better.
Another thing you can do to help your ego help you is to focus on the aspects of
your life you're grateful for. Reminding your ego that there are already many
wonderful things you've acquired or achieved will plump up its "self-esteem"
(a.k.a. your self-esteem).
When you focus on what is wonderful in your life, your ego will get enthused
about ensuring more wonderful things come into your life. And that's the basis
for bringing more abundance into your life.
In his book, "The Attractor Factor" (which I highly recommend), Dr. Joe Vitale
talks about getting "clear" on what you don't want and what you do want in your
life.
One of the ways to "clear up" things in your life is to discuss them with your
ego. Let it tell you about things from your past that might be obstructing the
changes you want to make.
By discussing these things in self-talk with your ego, you enlist the aid of one
of the most powerful aspects of your personality.
No one has to know about your self-talk discussions with your ego. You can do it
silently when you have a spare bit of time. These moments can occur frequently
during your day--when you're waiting for a report to print, when you're placing
a phone call and it rings a long time, when you're waiting for your computer to
complete an action, in the shower.... There are many moments during every day
that you can utilize for these little "chats" with your ego and make a huge
difference in your life.
One last thing to keep in mind, as your ego comes into alignment with your
desires and changes start happening in your life (i.e., you start becoming more
"true" to yourself), people in your environment may start giving you some grief
about changing.
You are welcome to share this information with them so they, too, can begin to
improve their own lives. If they aren't interested in improving their lives, ask
your ego the best way to handle the situation and let it help you deal with
them. It may even be that it suggests you ignore some people and just take care
of your own life. Follow that advice and watch how many of those who don't want
to change remove themselves from your life or leave you alone. However, in the
words of Hippocrates, "First, do no harm."
Here's wishing you the very best in your life.