The best way for any company or organization to improve is for their
clients to be able to give them feedback. But in this case, their
clients are AFRAID to give feedback about problems--with specific
counselors or with the items promised in the book that aren't
delivered on (such as counseling for the birthfamilies)--because if
they do complain, well maybe they won't get a baby, right?

If they had something set up where clients could give their feedback
anonymously, the agency could 1) address the concerns, 2) publish
these concerns/address them in the newsletter or via email to current
clients, and 3) give frustrated clients a way to feel a little better
by giving them the ability to vent--and happier clients means good
business, right?

I have stories to share but can't at the moment due to anonymity
concerns. However we too, decided that the low percentage of failed
adoptions cited perhaps was only referring to cases where adoptive
families had physical custody of the child, and the birthfamilies
hadn't signed paperwork yet and changed their minds. That indeed
would be a low number. We believe that the percentage of unmatches
without the adoptive parents ever having physical custody is
substantially higher. That is not the agency's fault, but the agency
would do better to set expectations more honestly, to keep clients
more satisfied both throughout the process and in the end. Plus, this
lie makes it doubly shocking when it does happen--if you were more
prepared that this was a common occurrence, perhaps it would be
easier emotionally.

We checked out many agencies and other ways to adoption, and in our
opinion, none of them are perfect. This agency still seems the best
of what's available. Adopting just isn't easy. BUT the agency has to
be losing customers by word of mouth, and may be leaving itself
liable, by failing to define what a failed adoption is honestly, and
by not keeping the promises in the binder. Not to mention what
setting high expectations does to families emotionally, who are
shocked to have their adoption fail.

Perhaps one thing we can help them with (the agency will undoubtedly
read these posts, so perhaps we have provided them with the anonymous
feedback mechanism they sorely need), is to define for them what we
consider to be a failed adoption. And to ask for stats on different
degrees of failed adoptions. I'll take a stab at it to start a
discussion:

* Stats on adoptions where adoptive parents have physical custody of
the baby but the birthparents haven't signed yet, and the
birthparents rescind

* Stats on adoptions where there is a match for (how long a period?
24 hours? a month??? input?) ____ and the birthparents unmatch before
the birth of the baby

* Stats on adoptions where there is a match and the adoptive parents
meet the baby but never take physical possession, and the
birthparents keep the baby

I think it's important to define what we're talking about. Anybody
else have any input?